Do people stare at you?
Sometimes when I'm out, I notice that girls (more often than guys) stare at me and I usually assume it's because of the way I'm dressed or something. It could also be my facial expressions, I don't really know. At any rate, I find it pretty rude. And other times, when I'm having one-on-one conversations with people, I feel like I get a weird glance from them.
That's awesome.
Huh?
Your backpack. Good on you for being you.
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Into the dark...
I don't have anything that really sticks out about me. I'm kind of plain and blend in. I don't dress wacky or have weird colours in my hair or anything like that. I don't have an unusual walk, but yet, girls always stare at me. Usually teenagers or women in their early 20s. I've also noticed that it's usually a particular type of girl that looks at me. Usually the ones with died hair, make-up, very fashionable usually in groups of 2-4. I don't wear makeup or dress highly fashinable, but I always look presentable to go out and I buy clothes from typical stores that most teens/young women do, so it's not like I wear clown suits to go out in.
I can be doing anything or nothing and they still stare. If I'm shopping, they stare, if I'm crossing a road, they stare, if I'm sitting on a bench, they stare. I don't get it. If I'm on my own they stare, if I'm with someone they stare. When I look at them, they look away.
My AS is very mild. Whenever I mention it to people they're always surprised telling me they'd never have noticed or that I "look normal". Some people don't even believe I have it, so I don't think people who've never met me can guess I have AS or that I'm a little weird just by a few seconds of looking at me. What makes them even stare in the first place? Maybe if I was doing something to catch their attention, sure, but I just go about my business like everyone else. I've asked people if I do anything weird when I'm walking and they always say no, so I don't get it.
Does anyone else get this? Any idea why or what they stare at?
I don't need to write a post on this subject because you've said exactly the words I would have put. I've got exactly the same trouble as you. I'm a 20 year old female, and I go out looking trendy and presentable. I even have a fashionable handbag. And I'm slim aswell, and I don't walk odd either. I walk up straight, and at an ordinary pace. I try not to look at other people, but I can sometimes sense that somebody's looking at me, and when I do glance at them I notice that they are staring at me - just as I assumed.
In the corner of my eye, I even see people turn their heads towards me to give me the usual stare, and this even happens when I'm walking near a brick wall and there's nothing else for people to look at but me. So I always know that they've turned their head just to look at me. I take it personally too, because I look around at all the people I see, and I see some acting really stupid and they don't seem to get looks. Once I saw this strange-looking man stumbling about on his own, muttering to himself, and he looked all dirty and smelly too, but nobody gave him looks like they do me. I looked carefully at people passing him, and I knew they were all looking ahead.
I don't get stared at if I'm with somebody as much, but when I'm on my own, people stare at me like I'm the Elephant Man.
Blindspot149
Veteran
Joined: 7 Oct 2009
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,516
Location: Aspergers Quadrant, INTJ, AQ 45/50
Lets see I have had people do the following:
Stare at me
Pull their purses closer to their body
Pull their children closer to themselves
Lock car doors as I walk by
Walk to the other side of the steet as I pass by at night
I had a guy stare at me while riding a bike who ended up wiping out over the curb
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There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. Some kind of high powered mutant never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die -Hunter S. Thompson
Jellybean, this part of your post made me want to ask others here: does anyone else find that even when you try to keep a certain distance from people (random strangers, not people whom you're speaking to), they insist on closing it? Such as, when walking along a very wide pavement - wide enough that fifteen people could walk abreast - no matter how great a space you try to keep between you and someone passing in the opposite direction, they alter their course so that they pass as close to you as possible, sometimes to the degree that you almost brush against each other? And that, if you do manage to maintain the space, they look at you angrily?
I just thought this was very peculiar and wondered if anyone else experiences it.
Jellybean, this part of your post made me want to ask others here: does anyone else find that even when you try to keep a certain distance from people (random strangers, not people whom you're speaking to), they insist on closing it? Such as, when walking along a very wide pavement - wide enough that fifteen people could walk abreast - no matter how great a space you try to keep between you and someone passing in the opposite direction, they alter their course so that they pass as close to you as possible, sometimes to the degree that you almost brush against each other? And that, if you do manage to maintain the space, they look at you angrily?
I just thought this was very peculiar and wondered if anyone else experiences it.
I can totally relate to this! I haven't managed to work out yet whether it's deliberate so that they force you to change trajectory as a way of asserting dominance or whether they just aren't concentrating on where they're going. If a person actively changes their route so that they are walking directly towards me and would walk right into me unless I moved, I will maintain my route and the other person never fails to change track at the last moment. You have to call these peoples' bluff basically. Why should I move out the way of a person who has deliberately decided to walk right into me??
Jellybean, this part of your post made me want to ask others here: does anyone else find that even when you try to keep a certain distance from people (random strangers, not people whom you're speaking to), they insist on closing it? Such as, when walking along a very wide pavement - wide enough that fifteen people could walk abreast - no matter how great a space you try to keep between you and someone passing in the opposite direction, they alter their course so that they pass as close to you as possible, sometimes to the degree that you almost brush against each other? And that, if you do manage to maintain the space, they look at you angrily?
I just thought this was very peculiar and wondered if anyone else experiences it.
I can totally relate to this! I haven't managed to work out yet whether it's deliberate so that they force you to change trajectory as a way of asserting dominance or whether they just aren't concentrating on where they're going.
Although I have had a few people who I'm sure did the former, who would have certainly collided with me unless I moved, in the case of most, it just seems that they want to pass you, but at very close range. If you try and keep a distance from them, they don't seem to like it.
It's like people in queues who insist on standing so that they are virtually pressed up against you, and if you try to move a little further away, they just close the gap again.
It's like people in queues who insist on standing so that they are virtually pressed up against you, and if you try to move a little further away, they just close the gap again.
Interesting that you write about this; I have this experience all the time, and I thought it was *just me*. I dislike it immensely- (I don't like to be touched by random strangers). I also take it personally, because I feel the people are invading my space, so I just assumed that my presence was somehow so minimal that people acted like I wasn't there at all. I also get *run over* a lot with shopping carts and baby strollers.
Oh, and the thing about strangers passing me in the street: I've been bumped into a lot! Unfortunately, I'm smaller than most people, so if I DON'T get out of the way, I'm the one who will be run over.
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"death is the road to awe"
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