as a child, did you use friends' names?

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trappedinhell
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21 May 2011, 3:58 pm

When talking directly to a friend I would sometimes use their name, but when talking to parents or others, I would never use a friend's name, but would just say "my friend." Using their name with others seemed rude and intrusive to me, as if I was betraying their privacy. Also it added a whole layer of complexity that I could not cope with: I could barely cope with the me<->friend relationship. To make a me-friend-friend triangle, or worse, a me-child-parent-parent's contacts tangled net, was just too much.

Did anyone else feel that way?



blackcat
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21 May 2011, 4:06 pm

I always said "my friend" as well. I do not know why, though.


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Phonic
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21 May 2011, 4:06 pm

it's weird but i did the same, when I had friends that is.


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21 May 2011, 4:14 pm

With me for some reason it is hard for me to address people by name unless I know them really well.......I actually still have this issue. A lot of times people don't notice to much because I usually just reefer to people as 'dude' when I talk to them but this only works in informal situations.



TenPencePiece
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21 May 2011, 4:16 pm

Sweetleaf wrote:
With me for some reason it is hard for me to address people by name unless I know them really well.......I actually still have this issue.

Much the same here, though less so now. I don't know, I always tended to avoid addressing people by name for some reason.


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Zen
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21 May 2011, 4:24 pm

I still often refer to people that I know as "my friend", regardless of whether they're actually my friend or not. Depending on the situation, either their identity isn't important to what I have to say about them, or the person I'm talking to doesn't know them anyway, so it's pointless to say their names.

I also have a hard time addressing people by name. I think the only person I call by their name is my cousin who raised me.



Meow1971
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21 May 2011, 4:41 pm

Same here... I only would use my friend's name after my mother repeatedly got angry with me for using pronouns or 'my friend'. I still have the issue of not naming people and when I do it is usually only as a point of reference.



CockneyRebel
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21 May 2011, 5:06 pm

I used my friends names as a child.


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Todesking
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21 May 2011, 5:12 pm

I noticed a lot of people when I was a kid called me by my lastname. I guess I was not good enough to be addressed by my first name. It was weird my brother Dennis was always called by his first name.

I always called my friends by their names when I was a kid. I still have trouble with eye contact so I have to say their name otherwise they don't know who I am talking to.


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SPKx
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21 May 2011, 8:08 pm

I rarely or never use a person's name when addressing them.



ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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21 May 2011, 8:16 pm

trappedinhell wrote:
When talking directly to a friend I would sometimes use their name, but when talking to parents or others, I would never use a friend's name, but would just say "my friend." Using their name with others seemed rude and intrusive to me, as if I was betraying their privacy. Also it added a whole layer of complexity that I could not cope with: I could barely cope with the me<->friend relationship. To make a me-friend-friend triangle, or worse, a me-child-parent-parent's contacts tangled net, was just too much.

Did anyone else feel that way?

I would use my friend's name but never wanted to use the name of their parents or other adults unless it was Mr or Mrs __________________ . I had no problem calling an Aunt or Uncle by their name with Aunt or Uncle in front. The most uncomfortable thing for me was calling an adult by their first name. I wanted to put Miss or Mr or Mrs and use their last name.
I must have got used to calling adults by their last names at school and couldn't adjust to calling them by their first names with no title in front.



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21 May 2011, 8:33 pm

As a child, and as an adult, I always avoid saying people's names.

I dislike using names because I always worry about using the wrong name - even if I've known the person well for years I still worry about using the wrong name. I also rarely call someone 'my friend' - I will not address them as friends because I'm always scared, no matter if they address themselves as my friend and I've been friends with them for years, that they'll actually not consider themselves to be friends of mine.


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21 May 2011, 8:40 pm

Nope but then again I barely said anything.

Now I only say someone's name if I need their attention (although sometimes I don't even then) or I have some sort of respect for them, like if they are in a band. I only ever say someone's name if they are in a band. Then I don't stop.


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ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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21 May 2011, 8:50 pm

That reminds me of this time I was trying to get someone's attention and I had a friend with me so I tried to catch up to them yelling "Hey...HEY!! !!" My friend was mortified I would dare address someone with "hey," but I didn't know who they were. She said, "I don't address people with 'hey'." I asked her why and she said it was rude. I was puzzled. It just seemed like a way to get the person's attention before they were out of earshot.



littlelily613
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21 May 2011, 9:43 pm

I ususally refer to people when I am speaking of them by their first and last name if I know them.



kahlua
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22 May 2011, 4:23 am

I never use people's names to address them. No idea why, I just feel like I can't say it