NT-ness and NT-Intonation. Curbing your sayings!

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Hi all,

I hope I dont get dive-bomed by members with this post, but I've been finding myself tripping over words and casual sayings as I realise many aspies (in RL) will take things the wrong way.

I think it's mostly to do with intonation of what you say, a bit like sarcasm.

eg: "I do love you (name), your such a character" with a tone of fondness and a shake of your head.

This small sentence can mean many things, in the context I mean, its like saying several sentences such as:

"Your great girl/guy, and I find you great to be around"
"You're so amusing, you make me laugh"
"I dont believe you said that, but its still funny"

eg 2: "God, you are a nutter!" spoken with a smile/chuckle.
Again is sort of like "I dont believe you just said that, but its still funny" or "I dont believe you just did that, you've got balls!"
It is a fond expression, when I hear things from someone, which is funny/amusing/slightly silly.

This is totally platonic in nature, but if the Aspie you are talking to can't distinguish the tone in which your speaking it can become a problem. Which is where I find myself about to say things like I would to friends/family and I abruptly have to stop anything from leaving my mouth and feeling a bit out of sorts as I dont want anything to get out hand and I dont want to have to explain a casual saying in 3+ sentences.

Anyone else have this problem? Curbing your instinctual reactions? I have to be careful what I say, as it's within a work situation, pretty informal, but a work situation none-the-less.

Replies from Aspies and NT's for their points of view would be great. Its just nice to get this out and off my shoulders!

Weary,

Juli

I think the easiest way to approach the situation of talking to an Aspie to avoid misunderstanding is to speak the words you would use if you were on the internet and you couldn't use emoticons.

Rocky:

This sounds like a good approach. I think my friends might sometimes do this around me whether they know it or not.

Yea, I get what you're syaing, but what are those words?

I'm not a crazy netter

What am I going to say "like these?" Very Happy Shocked Smile Confused

Help!

Very happy: "HA HA HA That's so cool!"
Shocked: "Oh my!"
Smile: (ummm... can't you just smile?)
Confused: "I'm a bit confused!"
Unhappy: "That sucks."
I dunno what the other one is...

goat

"I'm happy for you." or "Nice to meet you." or "I'd like to be friendly."

I think I've been misunderstood.

I get the emoticons part, but it still doesn't convey half of what I want to say when I say the sort of small comments I gave examples for.

I think what I may have to do, is make up a very short version and keep practising them so that I dont make mistakes!

Thanks for the help,

J