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Joined: 21 Feb 2009
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 113

01 Mar 2009, 2:00 am

Has anyone else ever been able to predict them just based on observable behavior and speech patterns? Especially online for instant messaging and even texting. After getting to know them fairly well that is. If so, can you explain it at all?

For me, the main thing to follow is the speech patterns. In person it's A LOT harder to use. Online, however, is far easier. As people tend to talk most openly and normally when you first start talking. When they talk about good things or themselves, and when they are having good days. Once you get that pattern memorized in its variances, you can work on when they are bored, when they are annoyed, when they are unimpressed, when they are distant or not being truthful, when they are being irrational, etc. I look for little ques and hints like emoticons, responses when I mention things they like, or try to get them to talk about themselves, how they say goodbye, how they respond to something similar to something you said when they were happy or normal, and all kinds of crap like that. Things to be careful of are if you're the reason for their moods or not... I tend not to say anything in regard to them seeming one way or another. When I do it tends to be really innocent and in question form... to which I try to sound like I care.

I dunno, it's just a big pattern that I just sort of know with people whom I am familiar with. Another thing to note is that I never really know the exact reasons as to why they are upset, which isn't good, but at least I can somewhat tell whats going on.

P.S. I was just talking about how I do it... not giving advice. Don't try any of this to judge moods or accuse people of anything. It's taken me seven years to get fairly good at it, and I am still wrong fairly often... but yeah, I'll put emphasis on the trial and error part. As my girlfriend broke up with me today, and since phone conversations weird me out and mess with my head... instant messaging/texting is all we did apart of seeing each other in person. I knew something was wrong, and when it started to go wrong, but I had no idea why, as always.

P.S.S. I don't feel anything, bad or good, about the girlfriend thing... so don't worry about that as anything other than an example of why not to do this if you haven't started by yourself.


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Joined: 14 Jun 2007
Age: 57
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,678
Location: Middle East

01 Mar 2009, 1:36 pm

It's an excellent idea, I think. I do it, but quite intuitively/automatically. I don't think about it. I'm not bad at getting the hints from people. What I'm terrible at is deciphering what makes humans tick and how and why and when and how much. At age 47 I'm still learning and blundering.

So-called white lies are like fake jewelry. Adorn yourself with them if you must, but expect to look cheap to a connoisseur.