Are you open to friends about your Autism?

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We were talking about Autism in Science and for some reason I decided to not mention I had it. I'm not sure why, but the person knowing someone who had sitting next to me might have put me off, because there's a lot of stereotypes on them. I guess I don't want people to be mean to me too(I've told people before and they've used it against me).
I'm just wondering how open people are about it.
EMZ=]

I have little problem telling people about autism or asperger's and the traits I demonstrate.

My problem is having people to tell, of which there are not many, which is due to the aforementioned asperger's traits.

I tell no one there is no point.

Sometimes it doesn't come up. But it will eventually come up whenever I get to know anybody past the acquaintance level, at which point they're probably wondering why I'm so weird, so I tell them. I'm more likely to say things like, "Loud noises drive me really crazy," than try to lecture on sensory overload, though, because I know most people don't know much about ASDs in the first place. I used to lecture, but when even I am able to see confusion on someone's face, you know things aren't getting across. Doesn't help that I forget, mid-lecture, that most people don't know the jargon of psychology and neurology. Oops!

Really though, when somebody needs to know something, or they'd be less confused or hurt if they heard it, it gets said. One of the first things I say, often times, is, "I'm probably going to forget your name. It doesn't mean I don't care... I'm just horrible with faces. I can remember you have three cats, but learning what you look like is probably going to take a while." That's to explain face-blindness and hopefully stop people from getting offended that I "don't remember them". Many people can relate to being bad at remembering names, and you don't have to say "prosopagnosia" or "face-recognition" to explain it.

My circuits prof, after I'd made my second embarrassing unintended insult in his class, got told, "Ugh, I'm sorry, I have, like, NO social skills..."

I find it easier to explain whatever specific trait has popped up than to try to give a two-hour lecture on what autism is and how it affects me. Most people would zone out after the first few fifteen-letter words anyway.

Well.. I am undiagnosed so that makes it a little more difficult. But I have mentioned it briefly to a couple of people and they were both like: uh.. ... >.> <.<
And I find it very difficult to explain the reasons why I believe I am autistic. Especially since most people do not know any of the symptoms associated with it aside from being 'out of touch with reality' as in LFA.

So I'm probably not going to tell anyone again.

I don't think there should be any shame in telling people. I don't understand why there has to be some sort of taboo...I would rather have people know so that might have a better understanding of other people that they come across who are on the spectrum.

That being said, I know I am "not supposed" to tell people, but I end up doing it anyway...Just so they understand my weird behavior and whatnot.
Unfortunately, it does not seem to help them understand any more than they already do. It just makes me seem even weirder I guess. ...and then the misconceptions rear their heads..People who I have told a.don't believe me...or b. think I am supposed to be good with numbers or have some database in my head of random information...

My question is..if I am not supposed to tell them about AS, then what AM I supposed to tell people, when i inexplicably start having a meltdown in front of them...or what-have-you...?

I let them think I'm weird, I mean, I guess I am weird, fancy reason they don't understand or not.
EMZ=]

My experience is similar to Callista's. Sometimes telling people only makes it MORE confusing. Sometimes I WANT to be able to tell people more, because it explains more, but that can be good or bad. If you are really struggling with a certain social dynamic, it might help people understand the root of your behavior if you tell them about autism/AS. But then, it gives people a label to put on all of your behavior, and then, your unique personality ends up being viewed as a syndrome or a handicap or something. I consider AS FUNDAMENTAL to my quirky personality. But it really really is MY personality, not some defect on a normal brain, like if you were born blind or crippled. Of course being blind or in a wheel chair WILL affect who you are and how you define yourself, but those things in themselves don't. Like, if you are blind and so you go to a blind school and deal with blind person issues and have blind friends at school, well, your blindness has affected your expression of your self, but it does not define your personality.

Autism on the other hand, is intrinsically part of who I am, as a SPECTRUM not a disorder or syndrome. There have been aspects OF the spectrum which can be called a disorder, such as sensory overload or social blindness, but the reason I sometimes have those is the same reason I am able to analyze art or excel at language. It's not like I happen to have some disabilities and in some coincidence I got some gifts to balance them out----no, if my brain was able to filter stimuli more, I'd be better at complex social settings, and worse at learning and analyzing. I can't be both, because its not about brain power, but brain structure.


So anyway, autism is part of my identity, not something I want to hide. Just like being male, American, Christian, an adult, a friend of certain people, is part of my identity. And I don't want to hide any of those things, but unfortunately, telling people about autism can do more harm than good. It would be like if you speak a different language, in which 'male' means 'criminal' or something. If you pointed to yourself and said, 'male', well, the person now knows less about you. I want to have more close friends whom I can tell about my autism, but as it is, the people I am developing relationships cannot relate to me very well on my interests, sense of humor, or anything. They like me, they just think I'm odd. Half my jokes they laugh at, the other half they look at me funny. I don't want to explain the odd half by saying they are the result of bad social skills or some 'syndrome' of the brain called autism, and thus damage the image of my good half. But hopefully, if I get to know someone for a long time and then tell them, they will look at autism through the lense of ME, not me through the lense of autism.

I'm not really.

I told one and told another how I had traits (before the diagnosis), but there are friends who outright said 'no, you can't have that'.

So I left them in the dark (didn't tell them) about my ASD diagnosis.

I tell them about my 'differences' though, because I can't avoid explaining about overloads, routines and such as they're too obvious and disordered to go unnoticed.

But my friends want to believe I don't have 'that' so whatever. For the time time being it isn't important.

I tell people if it happens to come up in conversation or if I need to, like when I meltdown then after I explain.

I've never told any of my mates I have AS, I've never bothered telling them because I just get in with it.

I don't tell anyone.

I don't feel like educating anyone, and I'm cool with people just thinking I'm weird.

What difference does it make, really? Either they like me or they don't. If they do, no problem. If they don't, why would they be more likely to just because I have issues?

I tend not to tell people. Some of my school friends know because either they have it or they have other friends that have it.
I have never told an out of school friend or aquatence, there's not much need as it's not obvious, I can come across as annoying at times but meh they don't care.
If they ever did find out I wouldn't mind so much, I'd just explain and not mention it again

I told some one for the first time back in January. I am glad that it was not a friend with whom I would be continuing a relationship because it fundamentally altered the way I was treated. The person, who had been treating me like everyone else for nearly an hour, suddenly began to help me a little bit too much and repeated things specifically to me that were not repeated to anyone else. I decided that, for me, their ignorance is my bliss.

On the other hand, I suppose it depends as much upon the nature and education of the person you tell as anything, right? Maybe I'll try again sometime.