do you get taken advantage of?

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It just seems to be the thing with autism and aspergers
People see weakness and see what they can get out of you.
and It's something to do with not being able to tell when people are lying and not knowing what their intentions are.
and I sort of have an "oh well" attitude to money and when I lend it out I don't really care If i get it back of not.

I can easily tell when someone is lying to someone else, but can never tell when someone is lying to me, unless it's my husband. I can tell with him easily too. I get taken advantage of a lot, or used to. I get revenge though. I've gotten a reputation as fairly mean when it comes to that, so people have stopped taking advantage of me. I've also developed a cynical outlook about others.

Frances

This is true. I am very vulnerable here, because I always end up being used and taken advantage of and I don't know how to prevent it. It doesn't have to be anything serious, but I always end up being a doormat. I was raised to be this way, because my mother interpreted my behavior as being rude, so she encouraged me to think about my needs less and to accommodate other people. It means I don't know how to say no or sometimes not even how to express my opinion. This all leads to people using me and taking advantage of me. Not knowing when they lie doesn't help.

I'm not particularly revengeful. But I just had to learn the type of situations that never bring anything good. One telling sign is when a person who was previously mean or cold to me starts acting nicer and more sympathetic towards me and when (s)he starts giving me compliments. Nine times out of ten, it ends up with them trying to make me do something for them or use me in some way. So I learned to say no here (well, not all the time, but often), and I've noticed that people actually respect you more when you do it. It makes no sense to me, but it's like that.

Yep, they sure do. I have an incredibly hard time saying no to anyone who wants my help. Also, peole tend to find out right quick that if they start yelling at me, I will shut down and either cave in or run away.

I used to make some of my living from recording bands and screen printing posters and album covers (I'm incredibly good at repetitive tasks like printing), but I had an incredibly hard time getting people to pay for their work. Eventually, the recording gear started breaking and I couldn't afford to fix it because my "friends" thought they didn't have to help support the studio. Likewise with the printing, I ran out of ink, emulsion and paper eventually. I eventually got rid of both studios. Then most of my "friends" stopped wanting to talk to me when I was no longer useful to them.

I switched to smaller, more personal crafts like bespoke hand sewing. When I tell them it would take me 70 hours to make them a skirt, they stop asking for one.

I hate when people ask me for advice but when I ask them for some, they don't know what to say or don't care. Maybe because I like giving and they don't, or maybe I'm simply being used..

Ahhhhhh i know this to well...

You really put yourself out there to help a friend out... whether its just emotional support or maybe a few pointers with whatever they want help with... take the time to make sure they get all your genuine concerns... but as soon as you need someone to do a small favor for you... just doesnt happen... eveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer

I know this feeling! I am constantly Talking people through hard times, then when I'm having a bad day they don't want to know.

I'm completely unmanipulable. I sometimes think that people try stuff with me more, probably because they don't get the usual interaction info, so I have easier kinds of trickery to deal with than other people. But only honesty has any chance of making me feel anything. Fakeness feels nothingy so it can't affect me. Not sure why I'm different from other aspies on this. I find myself possibly grateful to my parents for being so damaged because it gave me instincts about boundaries. Hard to suppose that others here didn't have similarly damaged parents.

I am a doormat too, its like I give off this naive vibe. It was bad when I was a child. In high school I was 6 1/2 feet tall, played (Canadian/American) football, and was unpredictaby violent, so it wasn't really a problem then, user's seem to know what to avoid. Now I am in university so the whole intimidating barbarian front doesn't fly, and I found that certain people here also take advantage of me.
My biggest problem is that I always give people the benefit of the doubt. I can't wrap my head around the idea that a person can be okay with taking advantage of another person, especially when the victim is not (completely) aware of it, so I never make the assumption or form the suspicion that this may be the case with me. Example would be when I was 10 and another child stole my bike by saying "hey, nice bike, mind if I try it out?" Not only did he "try it out", he rode away with it, and I walked home.

I used to get bullied and beaten for being awkward at school. Around the second grade however, whilst in a bullying session (I was being kicked and punched and generally beaten up,) I broke my bully's nose and made him cry, never again was I bullied. I've learned to be a little paranoid when people approach me to avoid being taken advantage of. Also I guess my appearance helps that as well, (I look like I would kill you in a heart beat )

It's not that I can't tell other people's intentions and when they're lying, because I am good at telling those sort of things with people. It's just that I find I am ''too nice'' and that when I do feel I'm being convinced or took advantage of, I sort of let them continue because I'm afraid to stand up for myself. I really don't know what's so ''scary'' about standing up for myself. Maybe it's because I fear conflict with friends, I don't know. So inwardly I already know that I'm being took advantage of, but I'm too timid to stand up for myself because I'm afraid of saying the wrong thing or causing an atmosphere (for example in a work environment). I just get too sensitive to things.

Not anymore. They did when I was a kid and kids still tried to when I was in middle school and high school. Now I am not around people enough for them to try and do it. It be rare now if anyone tries.

I have been taken advantage of over and over again in my life and it will continue for a long time to come-I cant tell how people feel about me and if they like me for me or for what I can do for them-it can be troubling but I cant tell.

My policy is to say No. I don't have to think about it or tolerate long-winded emotional appeals because my pre-determined policy is to say No. Sometimes, when I've had a chance to consider the matter at leisure in a non-manipulative environment, I'll change my No to Yes, but very seldom. I'm almost always sorry I have, but I'm willing to accept the consequences because this way it is truly my decision.

my parents raised me the same way, whether they thought i was rude or i don't know what. they have weird ideas... never mind. i don't know when people are mean or cons, can't read a situation, can't read expression and meaning behind others' actions. and i don't know the right thing to say or do when i realize someone is bullying or lying or whatever.
the plumber took three hundreds dollars from me for his work and i realized too late i was coned. many years ago, someone preteneded to be an immigration officer and showed me a fake badge. he flashed it so quickly i couldn't see a thing and he was dressed like a bum and they're supposed to come in couples... i figured it out finally, but it took me a while to realize that - and realize who sent him... long story. but i'm lucky i didn't get killed.
there was a cop i saw in the train station every time i took the train to work who talked to me and gave me compliments and seemed really nice - untill he offered me money to sleep with him as if i was a hooker. (i said no, just in case you're wondering)
aspies should learn self defense.
anyway, i was talking about noise my neighbors were making at night and my parents said, don't call the police, they wouldn't do anything anyway, and don't say anything to the neighbors. when i was a kid my cousin used to hit me without the slightest provocation and i wanted to learn self defense and my mother wouldn't let me. and if someone hit me and i hit back she got mad at me. i told her the neighbor's kid was picking on me and she said it's my fault because i didn't make friends with the kids in the neighborhood, stuff like that... so i understand what you're saying. i've been there too.
when people ask me to do something my automatic response is to agree, so now i disagree with what people ask me to do sometimes just for practise.

It's so bad for me since my special interest is psychology so I love talking about it. I've memorized stats to go with the theories and I love telling people them, though my counselor repeatedly tells me I'm being used. I am in a bad situation.