Corrupt A Wish

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(the dvd is used and from korea )

granted, a nice cup of beetle juice.

i wish i had a hobby.

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most people think i'm a bit strange, even abnormal. normal is the majority, the average, what is most frequent. if you lived around here, you'll see the positive of not being normal

Granted, your new hobby is collecting house flies

I wish there was a good movie on the TV this evening.

granted, it''s a shame there's a powercut at the same time.

i wish i had a decent multigym.

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most people think i'm a bit strange, even abnormal. normal is the majority, the average, what is most frequent. if you lived around here, you'll see the positive of not being normal

Granted, you have the best multigym in the world. It costs £100,000 and you borrow the money off a man called Mr Shark. However, you are late with a payment and Mr Shark ties you into the multigym and ... well use your imagination. Horrible.

I wish I had a bottle of beer.

Granted, you have a bottle of the best bear in the world. The only thing is that it is a 200 microlitre bottle.

I wish that I had a pen which would write floating in thin air without me having to hold it in my hand. This would be to making writing less of an effort.

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Health is a state of physical, mental and social wellbeing and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity I am not a jigsaw, I am a free man !

Diagnosed under the DSM5 rules with autism spectrum disorder, under DSM4 psychologist said would have been AS (299.80) but I suspect that I am somewhere between 299.80 and 299.00 (Autism) under DSM4.

Granted, floating in thin air... Hmmm that sounds an awful lot like you are floating in space. You remembered the pen and paper but forgot your space suit. Oops!

I wish my computer was faster.

Granted, you now owe a lot of money for stealing Area 51's supercomputer. You don't have the money and you are sentenced for life.

I wish for a model airplane.

Granted you get a paper plane model kit, including materials and instructions.

I wish I was a pilot (jet pilot).

Granted... On your first solo, you try to advance throttle and inadvertently retract the landing gear (while still on the ground). You are now reassigned to desk work.

I wish I were a secret agent.

Granted, you now are an agent for the Paranoia RPG SecSoc, Psion. Please enjoy recruitment.

I wish I could get tunes stuck in others heads with a simple wave of my hand.

Granted, but every time you do you also get that tune permanently stuck in your own head. Having one tune stuck in your head for a while is annoying, but you will have many tunes overlapping forever.

I wish I could find this song I know the tune to but can't remember the name of.

Granted, you remember the name of the song. Unfortunately, it's "Never Gonna Give You Up" by Rick Astley. You've been mentally Rickrolled.

I wish I could time travel.

Granted, you can travel 5 seconds forward or backward in time.

I wish I could draw things into reality.

Granted the first thing you draw that comes to mind, is a giant man eating gorilla, (who fancies you as a snack).

I wish I lived by the Sea.

Granted, you move to the coast one week before a horrible tsunami (heh, I am nice, I gave you one week).

I wish I could miss the Java exam, which I am going to fail horribly, without getting into trouble and without it being counted to my mark.

Granted, you miss the Java exam and get full marks. However, your family are then kidnapped and you are forced to finish a Java program. You can't do it and so your family die !

I wish I had more stuff to do.