Corrupt A Wish

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Granted, you'll never have time to be bored again because the UN appoints you as a special envoy to solve the world's problems.

I wish I could stand in the rain without getting wet and without needing an umbrella or thick hooded overcoat/mac to do so.

Granted. Your skin dries up because of the lack of moisture.

I wish for a Happy Easter.

granted- everyone you hate is having a ball all around you

I wish I will think of a great april fools trick?

granted- everyone you hate is having a ball all around you

I wish I will think of a great april fools trick

Granted. You will not be able to utilize that trick though.

I wish all pushy sales people only went after each other with their sales pitches.

Granted. However, it turns out they had some great deals. You missed out!


I wish I could move to Alaska

Granted. But North Korea is going to attack it soon.


I wish to be immortal.

Granted. Hundreds of years later you live to regret it.

I wish for spring weather.

Granted. Springs are made by coiling metal in a hot oven. So get yourself ready for extremely hot weather to experience the same action.

I wish to live in a fortress.

Granted. But the fortress is in Atlantis which disappeared under the oceans many centuries ago. Wear your swimming suit.

I wish I had my own day of the week (not one of the seven days everyone has).

Granted. But your day of the week is in another plane of existence, in the 5th Dimension, where you live alone without any human companionship, because only your DNA is compatible with the space-time matrix of that Dimension.


I wish to have the power of time travel.

Granted, but you can only travel .0001 second forward.

I wish that someone would do my taxes for me.

Granted. You owe the government $100,000,000.

I wish someone who really knows Italian food would go to The Coliseum Restaurant at 16608 El Camino Real in Houston, Texas near the Johnson Space Center and tell me how to make their "Chicken Ala Mama" dish. I haven't been there in over twenty years and there isn't a month go by that I don't have an urge to make a 1,500 mile round trip just to eat it.

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I don't know if this has been posted or not, so in case it hasn't:

Granted. You are told how to make it but anytime you make it, it will be taken away from you before you can eat any of it.

I wish to be invisible with a force field around me so i don't get harmed.

Oh dear, you suffocated because the force field was impermeable to oxygen and you were not able to breathe. They could not reach you as they could not see you and because the force field prevented them from getting there anyway...


I wish for the ability to safely walk on walls and ceilings.

Granted, but now you can't walk on floors or ground, making life harder for you.

I wish I could get into somehting that's big already and catch up very easily on it.