Objects Put to Strange Uses

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I'm sorry you have a hurt foot. I hope it heals quickly.

Here's some plastic grocery bags to tie over your feet. And a hockey stick to fight off the weirdo dog.

Now I need some more coffee but I broke my favorite mug.

Aw. Sorry about your mug. I hate when that kind of thing happens. Here's a kid you can mug for his shoes. You can pour your coffee into one of them. Think of it as "flavored" coffee.

I need an extra hand for petting my cat while I try to type. Otherwise, I'm not petting her enough, so she tries to "help" me type by head-butting my hands and making me enter typos.

My cat does the same thing. Here's a scarecrow that can serve as a cat petter.
I would go to sleep early but it is far too bright outside and the spiders are too big to want to sleep in the basement.

Whoa! You have spiders you nap with, but they're so big they don't feel comfortable trying to fit in your basement? Uh... Here. Try using this airplane hanger for nap space. Nite-y-nite!

Might be good to have a flashlight for when it does get dark. I forgot mine. Some help?

Here, take this: , , and .

I need a nap, but I forgot my earplugs.

Here, break off the fingers from this mummified hand and stick them in there.

MindWithoutWalls: Upon getting a refreshing rest, I realized how my comment could have been read as the spiders not wanting to sleep in the basement instead of myself showing apprehension towards sleeping in the basement on account of said large spiders. My mind functions more poorly than I thought on 30 minutes of sleep over a 48-hour period.

I figured you'd meant something other than what it sounded like. I do that sort of thing, too. I hope my response was okay with you. I just thought it was funny to deliberately go with that misunderstanding. It made for a very funny image! Anyway, glad you had a refreshing rest. Here, have a glass of rocket fuel. I'm out of orange juice, but this should get you going!

Now, I need something to help me get well. I may be coming down with a cold. My throat is sore.

Being courteous, I poured half of it into a glass for you to drink as well. It works better than OJ.

I am making a servo kitty using a cat's skeleton (not one of my pets) I recovered under the porch and a powered exoskeleton. My friend wants his rail mount back (to be put on his AirSoft gun) and that leaves me with nothing to mount the cameras on. Now how is this thing supposed to navigate the house without crashing into a wall?

Here, give it this Garmin. It's brand new.

Well, I got that cold for sure. But it's getting better now. All I have to do is get some rest. But my cough keeps me up, as well as my runny nose. What can I do about that?

Here is a mattress for you to get some sleep.

Now my head hurts. Can you give me something for the pain?

Here's a tree to fall a sizable distance from. That should get your mind off your head!

I need to find a way to get food besides eating out. What to do?

Here's some rat traps. Let your dinner come to you!

I keep forgetting my reading glasses. Any suggestions?

Why not use this staple gun to attach them to your sleeve. Then just hold your arm up to slide them onto your face. You'll never lose them again.

My dog needs a good brushing of his fur, but I can't find the brush. Got anything I could borrow?

Here's a grill brush to use instead. Not only is it a good brush, it also scrapes off the burnt crunchies on the grill.

I ran out of GreenStuff to sculpt figures for Warhammer 40K and need to make a custom servitor for a friend.

Here. Have some green clay.

Anyone have suggestions for cutting my hair?

If you don't have any scissors, try folding it in half and taping it. That way, if you change your mind, you don't have to wait for it to grow out.

Darn. All my perfume is used up. Now what?