Corrupt A Wish

Post Reply New Topic

Granted! They ban all movies, TV, internet, books, video games, and all other sources of entertainment

I wish to not soak up cesium.

Don’t give them any ideas!

Granted, you won’t soak up cesium, just a little strontium 90.

I wish for no entertainment and no animal to banned here.

Granted! All food is now banned in Norway.

I wish to not soak up strontium 90, or any other radioactive thing.

Granted, you won’t soak up any radioactive thing. (Cough! Background radiation! Cough!) But now you get cancer and could need radiation treatment, but alas that can’t be provided since you don’t wanna soak up radiation on any form.

I wish for food to not be banned here. I may have food issues but I still need the dang thing.

Granted! Food isn't banned, but every beverage with the exception of water is.

I wish to get to the end of my life without ever having cancer.

Granted!

I wish to have legal access to more beverages than water.

Granted! Grass jelly soda and aloe vera tea are not banned. In fact it is now the law to have to drink them everyday in addition to water.

I really really wish I could beat level 147 on Candy Crush. I've been stuck on that level since last year. Seriously! What gives?

Maybe you’re just not that good at it?
Granted, you beat level 147 but you’ll be sued by the developer of Candy Crush for using the word candy without permission. He has trademarked it after all.

I wish to never have to drink grass jelly soda and aloe vera tea.

Such rudeness.

Granted. You don't have to drink it. All food and drink goes straight into your intestines through a tube.

I wish to not be sued by anyone at any time in my life.

Haha, sorry

Granted, you won’t be sued, but you’ll be banned from playing Candy Crush since you still use ‘candy’ without permission. Candy Crush level 147 will remain the one that got away.

I wish to not be fed through a tube.

Granted! You are spoon fed by your mother like a baby.

I wish to not get banned from CCS.

Granted! You won’t get banned from it. But guess what? You still won’t beat that level either.

Grr, I wish to never be spoon fed by anyone.

Granted: You are never spoon fed by anyone. Issue is that you end up with a partner that purees everything in the blender and now you are fed everything via a straw.

I wish to be much better at time management so I can get things done.

Granted! Now everyone hates you because you won't give them tips on time management skills.

I wish to be the richest person in the world!

Granted, but now you can't go anywhere without security because you are now a huge target.

I wish my dryer dried clothes faster.

Granted. It also shrinks them to a tenth of their original size

I wish it wasn't so cold outside