Corrupt A Wish

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Granted, you are converted to stone

I wish for ten thousand wishes.

Granted! but they all must relate to blood pressure cuffs!

(can i still feel the pressure as a stone)

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As stone you are just a lifeless statue, so feel nothing.

I wish my motorbike was working and legal to use in France so I could go for a blast around the country lanes.

Granted! but you total it and kill yourself crashing into a routemaster!

i wihs i were not stone and able to feel the pressure without dying

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When in doubt, ask an autistic. Chances are, they're obsessed with what you need to know.

Autism Speaks will NEVER speak for me

CLASSIC AUTISM

OH MY GOD! I did actually total a motorbike once crashing into a bus!! ! I ended up unconscious lying on the road. As I regained consciousness I saw a sea of faces looking down at me and a hysterical woman shouting "He's dead I think he's dead!" but I couldn't speak or move to tell her I was still alive. A little while later I could talk and move again and was bundled into the back of an ambulance.

Granted, you perhaps could feel the pressure but you would probably suffer from the bends and die. (I wonder what deep sea divers feel pressure wise?)

I wish I knew everything

GRANTED! YOUR BRAIN EXPLODES FROM IT!

(water pressure feels different though)


I wish i didnt get the bends and had anti-bend oxygen to breathe

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When in doubt, ask an autistic. Chances are, they're obsessed with what you need to know.

Autism Speaks will NEVER speak for me

CLASSIC AUTISM

Granted, but you become trapped and starve.

I wish it was easier to understand people's emotions.

Granted! but you only understand other autistics

I wish i had a endless G-Tube feeding supply within my giant blood pressure cuff

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When in doubt, ask an autistic. Chances are, they're obsessed with what you need to know.

Autism Speaks will NEVER speak for me

CLASSIC AUTISM

Granted, but there is a power cut and nothing works any more and you die.

I wish my dog didn't catch little birds.

Granted! he catches big ones!

I wish i had an endless battery on there

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check out my website at {redacted by admin - domain taken over and points to a porn site}

When in doubt, ask an autistic. Chances are, they're obsessed with what you need to know.

Autism Speaks will NEVER speak for me

CLASSIC AUTISM

Granted, but thieves break in and steal all the copper wiring and copper pipe leaving you helpless where you die.

I wish my dog didn't find awful stinky stuff to go rolling in.

Granted! he goes and rolls in battery acid and dies

I wish no one stole all the pipe and wiring

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check out my website at {redacted by admin - domain taken over and points to a porn site}

When in doubt, ask an autistic. Chances are, they're obsessed with what you need to know.

Autism Speaks will NEVER speak for me

CLASSIC AUTISM

Granted, but a cleaner comes along and unplugs the electrical supply to your oxygen machine while she vacuums the building. She plugs it back in again an hour later but too late... you've turned blue and very dead

I wish my dog didn't chase cars! (He really does that given the chance)

Granted he chases semi-trucks and gets squished by 18 wheels in a row! making him a very very dead dead dead dog...

i wish my oxygen machine had a battery supply

_________________
check out my website at {redacted by admin - domain taken over and points to a porn site}

When in doubt, ask an autistic. Chances are, they're obsessed with what you need to know.

Autism Speaks will NEVER speak for me

CLASSIC AUTISM

Granted, but due to an unseen and continuous electrical discharge in your air supply you get overdosed on ozone and die.

I wish my dog wasn't stupid.

Granted! your dog makes more money than you kicks you out of your house and makes you llive in the doghouse

I wish my thingy was ozone proof

_________________
check out my website at {redacted by admin - domain taken over and points to a porn site}

When in doubt, ask an autistic. Chances are, they're obsessed with what you need to know.

Autism Speaks will NEVER speak for me

CLASSIC AUTISM