Board index › Off Topic Discussion › Off the Wall: Forum Games, Quizzes, Roleplaying, etc.

The Really Bad Advice Thread

Page 24 of 107 [ 1711 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1 ... 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27 ... 107  Next

Previous topic | Next topic

LupineSnowstorm
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Dec 2013
Gender: Female
Posts: 577
Location: Devon, UK

30 Dec 2014, 10:28 am

Cactuses often get lonely out in the desert. Try giving one a hug for moral support.


_________________
"Don't worry. You're just as sane as I am." ~ Luna Lovegood
"Have I lied to you? I mean...in this room?"~ GLaDOS
"Is there any time when how you look doesn't affect how you're judged?" ~ Daria Morgendorffer


Sokoro
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

User avatar

Joined: 25 Dec 2014
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 21

30 Dec 2014, 11:15 am

Do not do anything unless it is really necessary, and try to stay safe at home.

If you want to increase digital space on your HDD, then loosen the screws on the top side of the disk.

The best way how to fix any problem of your computer is to reinstall its OS, it also helps you to learn a lot about computers.



Spiderpig
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Apr 2013
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,893

30 Dec 2014, 12:01 pm

Nah, computer problems are best solved with a hammer.


_________________
The red lake has been forgotten. A dust devil stuns you long enough to shroud forever those last shards of wisdom. The breeze rocking this forlorn wasteland whispers in your ears, “Não resta mais que uma sombra”.


Jules_Bonnot_1912
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 22 Dec 2014
Age: 57
Gender: Male
Posts: 146
Location: location location .... that's what it's all about

30 Dec 2014, 12:48 pm

Spiderpig wrote:
Nah, computer problems are best solved with a hammer.

And don't let them accuse you of destruction ... the correct term is 'percussive maintenance' ...


_________________
I'm REALLY good in bed: I stay on my side and rarely steal the covers ...


Syd
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Dec 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,280

30 Dec 2014, 4:18 pm

Inserting youtube clips of popular sci-fi and fantasy movie quotes into your posts is a great way to strengthen your arguments in forum debates.



Jules_Bonnot_1912
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 22 Dec 2014
Age: 57
Gender: Male
Posts: 146
Location: location location .... that's what it's all about

31 Dec 2014, 6:18 am

If you're a window washer on the 44th floor, step back to admire your work.


_________________
I'm REALLY good in bed: I stay on my side and rarely steal the covers ...


ajpd1989
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Sep 2014
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 808

01 Jan 2015, 3:30 am

I someone says "have a nice day" to you, say "don't tell me what to do"



CosmicRuss
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 30 Apr 2010
Age: 159
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,101
Location: Location:Location

11 Jan 2015, 5:59 pm

Don't waste money buying dental floss. Just collect all your cat's dropped whiskers and carefully handwash them first at 60°C to sterilize them.


_________________
"Been there, done that, got the t-shirt"
- CosmicRuss


Nambo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 31 Aug 2007
Age: 66
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,882
Location: Prussia

11 Jan 2015, 7:32 pm

If you meet a nice girl at the disco and you want to "play safe" when she invites you around the alley out back, by the dustbins, well, if the chemists are closed, an empty crisp packet makes a good substitute.




(Our American friends possibly call them Chip packets).



seeslivepeople
Butterfly
Butterfly

User avatar

Joined: 29 Nov 2014
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 13

13 Jan 2015, 4:49 am

When competing over volumes of alcohol consumption, it is always a good idea to drink the entire fifth in the first attempt, alleviating concerns over the other persons possible consumption.



jrjones9933
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 13 May 2011
Age: 56
Gender: Male
Posts: 13,144
Location: The end of the northwest passage

24 Mar 2015, 7:14 am

Push straight to the front of any line. People will recognize your innate superiority.


_________________
"I find that the best way [to increase self-confidence] is to lie to yourself about who you are, what you've done, and where you're going." - Richard Ayoade


dossa
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Aug 2009
Age: 48
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,590
Location: The right side of my couch...

24 Mar 2015, 3:36 pm

If you should somehow lose the cap on an aerosol can, do not fret. All you need to do is get a hammer and nail and create a new hole in the side of the can.


_________________
"...don't ask me why it's just the nature of my groove..."


naturalplastic
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Aug 2010
Age: 70
Gender: Male
Posts: 35,189
Location: temperate zone

25 Mar 2015, 4:49 pm

When in doubt while driving ALWAYS make the middle finger salute to other motorists. It will always improve the situation.



ThetaIn3D
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Mar 2013
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,343
Location: Seattle

25 Mar 2015, 5:57 pm

Never use words when armpit farts will do.



SKSFox1999
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 25 Mar 2015
Age: 25
Posts: 108
Location: Abilene, Texas

25 Mar 2015, 6:09 pm

When you have a bent fork, douse it in water and stick it in outlet

When you are loading an M1 Garand, push down on the clip with just your thumb and don't hold the bolt back



mr_bigmouth_502
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Dec 2013
Age: 31
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 7,028
Location: Alberta, Canada

25 Mar 2015, 8:55 pm

If you have spots on your TV or computer monitor, Windex will help give it a nice clean shine! Also, if your computer is making a lot of noise, try disconnecting all the fans, then, you'll hear nothing but the sweet sound of silence! :P