Corrupt A Wish

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Granted, instead people suffer a fate worse than death.

I wish that I had a non-poisoned cookie right now, which I will eat and nothing bad will happen.

Granted but you realize it is radioactive with gamma rays after you swallow it.

I wish both Latin American Literature classes would stay in their correct classes after 65 people were in one room.

Granted, but the classes are disbanded, and you are fined $200 for no reason.

Granted, but you become a mouse.


I wish people wouldn't forget to make a wish.

Granted, but instead they forget to grant your wishes.

I wish that I could do my History homework in half an hour.

Granted but all the answers are incorrect.


I wish I could read every ancient language.

Granted. But you forget how to read and speak the modern languages.

I wish Lee Scott had the fate of William Wallace.

Granted. But snce I don't know who Lee Scott is, I kill some innocent guy also names Lee Scott and you have his death on your concience.

I wish I could pull rabbits out of hats. And don't mention overpopulation, I'd only do it sometimes.

Granted, but you pull ALL rabbits out of your hat at one time and their combined weight crushes you.



I wish I were John Adams.

Granted, but since I don't knw who John Adams is either, you become some lowly toilet cleaner called John Adams.

I wish I was Arbaham Lincoln.

Granted. "Bang" Your dead.

I wish I wasn't so tired all the time

Grant, now you're only tired most of the time.


I wish I were a flock of parakeets.

Granted, but your collective IQ is 50.

I wish that I was lonely no more.

Granted, but now you're in a mental hospital.


I wish Millwood Mental Hospital would burn to the ground.