"Xylophone is spelled in 'X'. That's wrong. Xylophone...zzzz...'X'. I don't <bleeping> see it! It should be a 'Z' up front. Next time you have to spell Xylophone, use a 'Z'. If someone says, 'Hey, that's wrong!' Say, 'No it ain't!' If you think that's wrong, then you need to have your head Z-Rayed. It's like 'X' didn't have enough to do, so they had to promise it more. Okay, you won't start a lot of words, but we will give you a cool starring role in Tic-Tac-Toe. And you will be acquainted with hugs and kisses. And you will mark the spot. And you will make writing Christmas easier. And incidentally, you will start Xylophone. Are you happy you <bleeping> 'X'?" -Mitch Hedberg
What I eat depends on the sport. Baseball, it would be a Footlong Fenway Frank and a Souvenir Coke. At home I do normal hot dogs with BBQ sauce, cheese, and garlic. For football, it varies even more depending on College or Pro. Bratwurst are usually good for Pro Football. Lemonade and maybe something Cuban for College. Hockey I like a nice sausage. Basketball I like nothing, as professional basketball tends to make me hurl since Larry Legend was forced to retire. I pull for the Celtics, but have trouble watching.
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I won?t tell anyone else how to be
You can be yourself, but just let me be me