Corrupt A Wish

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Grantd, but people think you are annoying because you know everything.

I wish I was high.

Granted, you are in an elevator in the worlds tallest building nearing the top. Oops the cable has snapped.

I wish I had a slice of cheese on toast.

You get cheese on toast, but then you vomit non stop for the next three hours.

I wish I could have a late growth spurt.

Granted. At age 67 you will increase your height by 50% within a year. Is that late enough and growth enough for you? Oh, and growth is a bit uneven. Your feet will double in size.

I wonder about the purpose of this thread. Is it to put you in touch with your inner evil fairy godmother? Or godfather, as the case may be?

I wish I were an orchid.

Sadly your fairy godmother has poor eyesight, and misreads your request as orc. I hope you like your brutish new life !

I wish that my dogs would go on their hind legs and start to do the twist each time happy music was playing in the house.

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Health is a state of physical, mental and social wellbeing and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity I am not a jigsaw, I am a free man !

Diagnosed under the DSM5 rules with autism spectrum disorder, under DSM4 psychologist said would have been AS (299.80) but I suspect that I am somewhere between 299.80 and 299.00 (Autism) under DSM4.

Granted, your do the twist as directed. However, sad music makes them whine. Heavy rock makes them aggressive and bite you.

I wish my dog didn't have a bad leg.

Granted, your dog doesn't have any legs at all (just a bunch of octopus-like tentacles).

I wish I was eighteen again.

You are now 18 days old again, so you have to go thorugh childhood all over again.

I wish that my dogs would do the twist as before, but when they hear heavy metal rather than getting angry and biting me. I wish that they would change the station on the radio or the record to something else which is more gentle. How about gentle waltz or cha cha music, I then have visions of the dogs grabbing each other before waltzing or cha chaing around the room.

_________________
Health is a state of physical, mental and social wellbeing and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity I am not a jigsaw, I am a free man !

Diagnosed under the DSM5 rules with autism spectrum disorder, under DSM4 psychologist said would have been AS (299.80) but I suspect that I am somewhere between 299.80 and 299.00 (Autism) under DSM4.

Granted. As a side effect of this wishes granting, your dogs have metamorphed into rabites. Cute limbless, yellow rabbit like things, that well, are actually rather hard to describe, but they don't bite. They bounce/hop to move. Did I mention that they only have 18 hp?

I wish I had a walk on cameo role in a movie.

Granted, you get a cameo walk on roll in a murder flick movie. You get stabbed, then pushed into a lake, and while you drown you are shot! As this is a cheapo movie none of the special effects are actually effects. You really have been stabbed, drowned and shot! If it is any consolation you played a great corpse.

I wish I could visit the International Space Station for a week.

OK you get to visit the space station but there is a problem, the Vogons turn up. Rather than just killing you they force you to spend a week at a Vogon poetry reading event. Rather than killing you to end your torment they then send you back to earth where you then have to spend the next few years in a mental hospital while you get over the nasty attack on your sanity which the Vogons call their poetry.

I wish I could have a babel fish to stick in my ear.

_________________
Health is a state of physical, mental and social wellbeing and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity I am not a jigsaw, I am a free man !

Diagnosed under the DSM5 rules with autism spectrum disorder, under DSM4 psychologist said would have been AS (299.80) but I suspect that I am somewhere between 299.80 and 299.00 (Autism) under DSM4.

Granted, no corruption.

I wish I also had a bablefish.

Hehe, good. Granted. You get a monitor with the bablefish online page burned into it grafted to your ears. How is that for a twist, eh?

I wish less games would be held back at the border, and released into the US. As a side note: With excellent translations.

Granted! but every "cool" game is still held back

I wish I had a million dollars worth of neoprene wetsuits

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check out my website at {redacted by admin - domain taken over and points to a porn site}

When in doubt, ask an autistic. Chances are, they're obsessed with what you need to know.

Autism Speaks will NEVER speak for me

CLASSIC AUTISM

Fine you get your neoprene wet suits, but then the bill arrives in the post. You can not pay it so you get sued for every dime you have.

I wish Strapples would make more wishes related to lead (or perhapes bismuth would do just as well).

_________________
Health is a state of physical, mental and social wellbeing and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity I am not a jigsaw, I am a free man !

Diagnosed under the DSM5 rules with autism spectrum disorder, under DSM4 psychologist said would have been AS (299.80) but I suspect that I am somewhere between 299.80 and 299.00 (Autism) under DSM4.

Granted!

I wish my harness on my wheelchair had lead in it so its heavier

_________________
check out my website at {redacted by admin - domain taken over and points to a porn site}

When in doubt, ask an autistic. Chances are, they're obsessed with what you need to know.

Autism Speaks will NEVER speak for me

CLASSIC AUTISM