Corrupt A Wish

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Granted, you are immediately shipped to live there on your own with enough air to last 24 hours.

I wish it was Christmas tomorrow.

Granted, but since Christmas Eve has not existed this year, there won't be any presents.

I wish there weren't any bugs outside that sting.

Granted! They all turn into red ants who now bite you.


I wish for a cup of coffee now.

Granted, but its a day old, so to reheat it, I put some more coffee in the machine and ran it through again!

EDIT: Also, its decaf.

I wish my room had a awesome radio in it and soundproof walls.

Granted, but it's so awesome, it only plays extremely loud. You not only lose your hearing but the loud music causes you to have a heart attack. You scream and yell for help, but no one can hear you.

I wish I was famous, but for a good reason.

Granted, you become the most famous actress ever. You go girl!


I wish I could fart in tune to the anthem 'Scotland the Brave'?

Granted, but oh dear what a mess. Not sure if it was a good or bad thing not to wear anything under that kilt. You really shouldn't have eaten that Vindaloo curry last night.

I wish for a bowl of soup.

Granted you get a bowl of water soup with a lump of something breadish on the penal colony of Devil's island.

I wish I was immortal?

Granted, just like Higlander (3?) you spend many years trapped in the cave of Mecano in Japan, and after your eventual escape you are head hunted.

I wish Highlander 2 had never been made.

Granted, you go back in time and assassinate all the cast and crew. However you get caught and will be only up for parole in the year 2072.

I wish I knew the name for the part of your body behind your knees?

Granted, but since no one cares what that part of the body is, the knowledge is useless.


I wish I had some tea..

Granted! No corruption. Drink it while it's nice & hot.

I wish for a new pair of shoes.

Granted, now you have yourself high heel shoes.

I wish I could have myself a set of TV glasses?

Granted, but you can only watch soaps as it's all it gets and gets jealous when you use another TV.

I wish the world would just end all ready. So I can take over the world.

Granted, the world ends followed by it exploding, leaving you with no world to take over.
(Or you could dominate Mars, oh joy!)

I wish I had more dumplings to eat.

Granted, but they aren't fried.

I wish I could live off canned spaghetti, frozen pizza, and top roman for the rest of my life.