Corrupt A Wish

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You did have but it dashed away.

I wish I was onboard the Red Dwarf.

Granted. You are the last human being alive.

I wish for my lungs to be cleansed of tar and tobacco smoke.

Granted, but during the process, they unfortunately use water, you suffocate from to much water and die.

I wish I could have dinner right now.

Granted. Suddenly you find yourself in a crowded restaurant, wearing only your dressing gown and slippers.

I wish the torrent I'm watching would stream more quickly.

Granted, it rains so fast that your house gets washed away.

I wish for a cookie.

Granted, you get cookies that are burnt to bits.

I wish I didn't have to stay home from school today.

Granted but everytime there is good thing on you will be ill

I wish i wasn't so damn awake and tired at same time

Granted. You fall asleep for a few years.

I wish I could walk across any terrain.

Granted, your legs are replaced with artificial ones.

I wish for a bowl of chocolate ice cream

Granted. Get me one too, while you're at it, will you?

I wish for scrambled eggs & bacon for breakfast.

Granted, but by a quirk of the space time continuum, they vanish from before you eyes and appear before mine instead.

I wish for a little brown sauce with that please.

Granted, you get a brown hollandaise sauce ... gee, I guess I burned the butter

I wish my feet were warm

Granted, your new shoes build up so much static electricity that they catch fire.

I wish to do some more work shortly

Granted, but your employer wanted a long program, so you get fired.

I wish I could fly.

Granted. Your wings fall off.

I wish I had a genie bottle.

Granted, you are punished by the genie for wanting extra wishes for this game.

I wish it would be Carnival this Friday instead of the Friday after that.