Corrupt A Wish

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Granted, but he isn't used to gas cookers and turns it on but doesn't light it, soon after BOOM! Your house has gone.

I wish my work was done by Friday.

Granted; Ub Iwerks is done for on Friday.

I wish to WHIP IT. INTO SHAPE. SHAPE IT UP. GET STRAIGHT.

Granted; you've only got 2 days to train for your solo around-the-world sailing trip, so you'd better whip it into shape fast!

I wish I were leaving for the beach in the morning.

Granted, you were leaving for the beach in the morning, now you are leaving for work instead.

I wish to sit outside this evening and meditate for a while under a tree - and not be pestered by flies.

Granted, you get these Asian Tiger Mosquitos instead. The ones that drive me CRAZY.

I wish for a small dish of dark chocolate ice cream with almonds.

Granted, but it sounded so delicious I ate it myself.

I wish for a glass of red wine to wash it down.

Granted, but you must first listen to the song Red, Red Wine by UB40, before receiving your wine.

I wish the person with whom I've been messaging on Facebook would hurry up and respond to my latest message.

Granted; they already have, but the message got lost in cyberspace, and now they're pissed that you haven't responded back.

I wish the old abbot will have time to talk with me today.

Granted, he catches a virulent strain of the flu and nobody else wants to talk to him today.

I wish my dog would stop farting.

Now he cracks fart jokes instead.

I wish for the seven Super Emeralds.

Granted, but then you find you need 100 megga super diamonds too.

I wish someone else would dig up my potatoes.

Granted, but the person who digs the potatoes up will keep them, leaving you with no potatoes.

I wish that I could drive an IndyCar.

Granted,but, for some reason, it causes the world to end (I'm not in a very creative mood today).

I wish I could have 3 more wishes.

Granted, but each corruption shall be worse than the last one.

I wish that all of my wishes were granted without corruption.

Granted. But oh dear, the things you wish for in your dreams!

I wish I were not obsessed.

Granted. You now can't figure out what to do with all that extra time you have which was previously filled by obsessing over things.

I wish for a fun time at Dinosaur Valley tomorrow.