Video game logic now applies in real life. What has changed?

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I can now carry carry a gun and walk up ladders without using my hands.

plus every time I shoot a red barrel, it blows up..

Also if i have a serious wound...I can just eat a cheeseburger or something, then everything is fine.

I now go smashing every barrel and vase I see in- and outdoors, and without any qualms I now go into the houses of strangers and go through their drawers and closets in case I can find any treasure there.

RNG applies to everything?

I now occasionally die just by touching water and other times can jump from my roof without energy

There will be no more fear of death. Sometimes I can just go back to the last save point or have a priest resurrect me (Dragon Quest). If I run out of lives/ continues, there's always "start new game", which will give me a new shot in the same body and with either the exact same or very similar experience all over again.


The people around you will only say the same lines over and over and over.

The arsenal of a medium-sized army. The literal power of a god. The ability to call forth massive fire explosions and make asteroids fall from the sky.

You need a key to unlock this wooden door.

Ooh, this is fun!

Getting hit with giant swords, axes, spears, lightning bolts, fireballs, windstorms, energy waves, and so forth only take off a bit of health and does no physical damage whatsoever.

[For Fire Emblem] You can only move via a grid, and your occupation determines how far you can move. Airplane pilots [Pegasus Knights and Wyvern Riders] can move anywhere from 6-7 spaces, but police officers [Generals and Knights] can only move four. Most people can only move 5.

You can date anywhere from three to six girls or guys at once and not suffer any consequences.

Awesome powers are limited to cutscenes only...or when the plot requires it. So, in the real world...never.

Deus et Machinas are highly common for no apparent reason.

You can ride ostriches [Chocobos] like horses. Speaking of, horses can run forever and are basically automatons.

Another one that would have been awesome!

Someone might just give me a farm out of the blue.

Going to sleep fixes any health problem.

You will never just randomly come across any type of enemy that far exceed your ability to take on.

Very strange glitches might occur anywhere, and your entire world including yourself might just freeze until someone angrily hits reset and you suddenly find yourself at an earlier save point without any recollection of the event.

Pokemon: PokeCenters seem to be able to fix anything that might ail a Pokemon.
You might wake up and find that you have become a Pokemon!
Having the correct badges will make powerful monster obey you, while lacking them makes them disobey.

I can reload my gun with visibly empty magazines, and it works.

I have multiple lives.

Sniping is something that happens at targets within stone-throwing distance, and involves a lot of running, crouching, jumping and spinning.

Holding a knife makes you run faster.

Specialization is for insects; combat medic sniper engineer assault troopers can also pilot helicopters and disarm nukes.

You can jump off a mountain the size of Mt. Everest and survive by combat rolling.

Everyone used to be an adventurer, yet for some reason no one buys knee armor.

You can shout at people or things to damage them.

My health returns to full every time I advance a level.

I can beat up monsters with anything from a stick to a deck of cards to a flute to a serving tray to a pair of pizzas to plain old fisticuffs...and no one bats an eye--because they all have crazy weapons, too.

You can use swords as brakes when going at superspeed, and the sword doesn't snap in half. You can also stand on a sword blade with perfect balance.

You can fall through the roof of a building and still be fine after going to an inn; only cutscene deaths count.

If you collect all 100 coins in a certain area you get this lovely magical star (mario 64)

If you commit a crime you'll only have to pay a fee and forfit your weapons (GTA series)

Two girls will become lesbians just because you tell them so for your own sexual amusement
(The sims) (I wish this could happen in real life)

Even without x-ray vision, I can tell there's a dangerous person behind a closed door because his gun and half of his arm are poking through it.

I now only need naps to feel fully refreshed, or the healer can just give me potions and I'm good to go.

I can always stand and walk/fly home after every fight unless I'm dead or unconscious.

I think of where I want to go, say a few magic words, and bam, I'm there. Awesome!

I get poisoned a lot, but usually I can just tough it out.

When I see something I want, I usually try to take it.

I'd prefer to have food and water, but I can battle for a long time without them if I have potions.

Despite years of military training I can't vault this knee high fence.