Prank phone calls

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If anyone has anything good to say to someone during a prank call, please let me know. thanks, starrsy.

I once was working at a answering service at night and got a "heavy breather" call. I said without thinking "I'm sorry, but I'm not interested in this" with no emotion - no annoyance or anything, just conveying information - and he apologized! He was actually a nice kid, although somehow screwed up enough to be making that type of call. Don't know if that'll work as anyone's standard response, though.

Oh, Starrsy, I'm sorry! I just noticed you're 12. The kind of prank calls I used to get as a kid, I would now say to just hang up on them quietly. (As opposed to slamming the phone down). This will tell them you caught on that it was a prank, that they didn't manage to upset you, and it will keep you from saying something dumb that they can tell their buddies. Getting into a war of words will just backfire on you and clever responses usually can be turned against you, IMO.

I'm happy to learn you have good enough self-esteem to want to defend yourself, though. That's excellent!

make some strange sounds like "brrrrrr" "pffff" "giiiii" try to sound a bit electronic and then go on with a computer like voice:
automatic FBI interception system. recording of phone call started by usage of suspicious word: [fill in any word the caller may have used]...
brrr fzzzz switching to mode hazard analysis
brrr fzzzz caller identified as well known suspect.

ok, from here on let the automatic FBI phone hazard detection system take over and alarm a special task force, give the caller commands like "stay in your house", "don't move" and so on.
if you know who is calling, let the "system" search it's database for information on the suspect (which can include any amount of insult and defamation (sorry guy, that's what the FBI has in it's files about you...))

Prank callers.

Cold calling sales people.

And wrong numbers.


Three reasons why I'm scared to answer the phone.

How about ...nothing at all? I've been getting a lot of those these days.

hello!

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have a nice day...