You made an entire post about how everyone you've met isn't a true friend and then said that if we're lonely it's our own fault because we need to go out and make friends? For example, you said to go get a job but then went on to say that people at work aren't really friends. That makes no sense whatsoever.
There were a lot of assumptions made in that post, too - namely that none of us go out and make friends. That is far from the truth, at least in my case. Another one is that we "make excuses." Also not true in my case. I consistently go out of my comfort zone and put forth the effort. All one can do is go out and meet people. You cannot FORCE friendships to happen. They occur naturally between two people who can relate to each other in some way. If one is already meeting people and can't make friends, then that's just the way it is. I'm a good person worth knowing AND a good friend to those who are my friend, and I don't believe for a second that AS, or whatever my quirks are, should be blamed. I know that I'm an extremely unique person and a lot of people don't resonate with me - I don't resonate with them either. I'm not a hermit in my home complaining that I don't have friends.
A partner is not something you can pick up at the market. Also not easy to obtain.
Socializing with animals IS one solution for me. It helps me a lot and eases loneliness. I don't "need" social interaction. I greatly dislike a lot of social interaction and it would make me feel worse. Since we are on an AS forum, that probably goes for some of the other posters, too.
Just because some people are lonely doesn't mean they aren't "trying hard enough". That's very condescending.
Also, I wouldn't suggest bars or clubs as far as making "real" friends.
There tends to be extremist thinking on this forum. If someone has friends they aren't an aspie, but if they don't, they aren't trying hard enough. What is with the dichotomous thinking around here?
15 Apr 2013, 9:36 am
