dealing with repercussions of a late diagnosis

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In a better informed world, such treatment would be deemed prejudicial and illegal, wouldn't it?

I can sort of relate to this. I struggled with maths pretty badly at school and dreaded social interaction so never asked for help. I was fine to good in other subjects though, so my teachers/parents thought nothing of it though. I did well at uni, but like you have never managed to get anywhere with work, I've worked in call centres for 6 years and have reached breaking point. I would basically go to work and that was it. I've never been a social animal but completely stopped meeting up with friends and basically slept most of the time on days off. I lost the energy and motivation to pursue hobbies that had once interested me.

I went to the doctors in March and have been signed off sick since (I couldn't cope with the noise and stress and it triggered a major depressive episode). I don't 'get' social interactions in the workplace and got through my time there by staying quiet and keeping my head down and I don't see how I would progress in that sort of environment. I've found since being a teenager I've had depression pretty constantly, I always have a feeling of being lost and not knowing how to interact/deal with the outside world. I've not had any diagnosis yet apart from clinical depression, though I did see a social work a few times who mentioned Aspergers, and from what I've read it does seem to fit. Waiting to see a psychiatrist (been 3 months so far) but I understand the NHS works slowly with these things. I don't have any answers at this stage, but one thing I have decided is I'm going to use this time to try to do something different with my life. The way I see it is the worst that can happen is I'll lose my job and the psychiatrist won't be able to help me. If that happens I figure I'll just have to look into whether I'm eligible for ESA or JSA whilst I try to find a job which won't make me lose my mind. Not ideal but at least I'll know what help is or isn't available. Do you think you might benefit from seeing your Doctor and asking for some support from them?

I did well at school academically, not socially.
But trying to find good work has been hard. When I have got a job it's been farm, retail or simple office tasks. I have been passed over for promotion when I knew I could do the job just as well because my social skills were poor.
When I was younger I could cope with the stress of retail, but I don't have the energy for it now. Being nice to people all day is exhausting. So many job adverts ask for the candidate to be able to "work well under pressure". Last job I did the other staff kept telling me to slow down because I was working too hard, so I know I can do well, just not in a loud or pressured environment.

Depression and loss of confidence make finding work harder but I just need to find a comfortable niche. I don't want responsibility or to be in charge. Just to do the work well and be able to learn more as I work.

Yes I can say that my life has been affected quite permanently. Directly by loss of 4 management level positions in my career and the inability to "learn" or "know" in the same manner as others. No less than 4 times I have lost higher level positions because of communication issues. I seem to be able to grasp tasks if allowed to learn in my own way and am diligent in doing them once I know what needs to be done. Things that impede that are (1) the idiot in the workplace that wants to make life miserable for everyone (2) people who "know" your job better than you do (3) not asking questions, I try to figure out what I need to know without input from others (4) Not communicating issues clearly to others, expecting them to know things that seem obvious to me. (5) Asking for help or clarification from the "wrong" people.

Thing is when you get these things at the worker bee level and move on up there is much more focus on the communication and interpersonal skills which we innately lack so there is a whole new set of challenges and throw in being closer to a new set of workers, management. Maybe not entirely new but relations change.

Having said all that, I am not going for an official diagnosis because I have been given a physc referrral to 2 of the lowest rated professionals. "Cast not your pearls before the swine, lest they trample them under their feet and turn and rend you"

For people on the spectrum I think you could say we learn things extra naturam instead of secundum naturam. Instead of learning things by the typical natural route we learn things in a way that is outside the that "natural" route or we don't learn them at all in many instances.