I do have quite a bit of trouble with theory of mind or cognitive empathy. I have learned that I can be insensitive as a result.
The best way for me to be able to feel empathy is see what a person is feeling, by their facial expressions or by other means. If someone can describe for me their feelings, I will feel empathy. Emotional empathy I have no problem with at all.
I just have a lot of trouble imagining what a person may be feeling in a situation, or being able to put myself in their place, unless it's something that I have experienced or have a lot of knowledge about.
I have no trouble feeling empathy when reading a book or watching a movie because I don't need to try to imagine the situation. It's very clearly explained, in one way or another.
If I have time to imagine what another person may be feeling in a particular situation, I can do it. But it takes a lot of concentrating and effort.