Aspie women married to NT men?

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I am married from last 8 years I suffer from Aspie (I am self diagnosed)
My parents were crazy father was alcoholic, voilent, destructive gone case
Mom was narcisstic, arrogant, depressed and melancholic
Brother crazy
And after i got married i noticed people would avoid especially my husbands family side
then after couple of years i saw that his friends avoided me
Then stopped coming home they would call my hubby outside to meet at restaurants etc
I cant socialise he is invited to many events, weddings and people tease me there
that i look depressed, sad, unhappy. I have stopped going out
He doesnt seem to understand he is in denial
Things get difficult for me living in this same city where i was born, abused, mistreated
i want to move away but he wont take interest
my son studies in a school where there is lot of study load i cant cope with it and ask
my hubby to change the school but he wont take interest
I am home most of the time and would like to go out at weekends
but he finds it boring and needs rest at weekends so he avoids taking me out
Love and romance as flied out of the window long back and now its just monotonous
No one comes here, no friends, no relatives, no cousins and all his relationships are spoiled
after he got married to me
This combination as brought lot of harm then do any good.

It sounds like your husband needs to be more supportive and understanding. He's not treating you with the respect and care you deserve if he's just dismissing your AS like that. Perhaps couples counselling might help you communicate with him, and might get him to adjust his bad attitude?

I am female NT with wife Aspies. I hope that I am not abusive as has been mentioned here. I work in social care and it was actually me who told her that I thought that she had As. She took a test and within 5 mins was calling me to say that not only had she scored 34 she had calculated how each question was weighted. ( she didn't really need to tell me the score she should have just leapt straight to the weighted bit).

She is incredibly clever and we both have a higher than average iq. Hers is obviously higher than mine

I love her quirks most of the time. I struggle only when I need some support emotionally as, even after pointing it out, she has no clue what to do. I have friends tho and supplement my wellbeing with contact with them.
She is often brutally honest and has been mentioned here she does not play games at all. I love that.
I won't play monopoly with her as she is ultra competitive and I lose the will to live if someone is beating her. Lol.
I do laugh and joke with her about her quirks. And she laughs too. Although she is carefu to point out that that is because she finds it amusing thT anyone would think that she could ever be wrong.

I'm a 56 yr. old female Aspie married to a 54 yr. old NT man. We've been married now for 23 yrs. I fail at making friends with other women.

My husband is enjoying one of his hobbies (metal detecting) with his friends while I sit at home alone typing this post. I thought when we got married that once he got to know me, we would become intimate friends. That never happened. We're not enemies, but we don't communicate either.

He has never been interested in getting to know me. What caused us to become married was his attraction to me physically. That led to our having a child (he had none and wanted a son, which is what he got... an Aspie son).

For years, in the beginning of our marriage I tried my best to do everything I could to get him to be interested in me. Nothing worked.

What I learned from it all is that if you can't have what you want, stop wanting it.

Hi
I am 43. Along with having asperger's, i have the added fun of being bipolar too. I married a man with bipolar and schizoaffective disorder and boy was that a mistake. My though process was that he can understand my mood swings, since he has them too. I didnt know what asperger's was at the time. I just saw my self as a bipole that was very analytical and saw everything in black and white.
We were married for 7 seven years. Around year two, he started complaining about my analytical nature and that my thought process was very black and white. It just got worst as the years went by. I had to deny who i was and had to watch everything i did. In the end, I divorced him in 2007. Along with all the crap he put me through, the last year of our marriage he decided that he wanted to be a vampire and is still playing vampire now. LOL
I am happier now in that i can be who i am and not have to worry about what i say or do. I would like to think that i can find a special person, but who would want to deal with a bipolar aspie? sigh

Hi
I am 43. Along with having asperger's, i have the added fun of being bipolar too. I married a man with bipolar and schizoaffective disorder and boy was that a mistake. My though process was that he can understand my mood swings, since he has them too. I didnt know what asperger's was at the time. I just saw my self as a bipole that was very analytical and saw everything in black and white.
We were married for 7 seven years. Around year two, he started complaining about my analytical nature and that my thought process was very black and white. It just got worst as the years went by. I had to deny who i was and had to watch everything i did. In the end, I divorced him in 2007. Along with all the crap he put me through, the last year of our marriage he decided that he wanted to be a vampire and is still playing vampire now. LOL
I am happier now in that i can be who i am and not have to worry about what i say or do. I would like to think that i can find a special person, but who would want to deal with a bipolar aspie? sigh

So I'm NOT the only one who asks self this question???
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I'm 44 now, diagnosed 3 years ago. My dh is NT and my diagnosis was a whole lifetime in the making!

DH did NOT believe I had depression, bi-polar disorder, Adult ADD or any mental disease (because he doesn't understand them...he thought I could just "snap out of it") Well, the depression & Adult ADD I have; the bi-polar I don't have & now the AS diagnosis.

I was very afraid to come home from that Psychiatrist appt & tell him! I had things for him to read. He read 'em and HMMMD & MMMMD a lot. Then he sat back in his chair & said "Yes, I do believe that you have Aspergers". WHAT A RELIEF!

I'm sorry to say that we still have bumps in the road...but the road is a little bit straighter now that we know!

I forgot to mention that my DH is probably borderline. He's probably just on the NT side of the threshold. (He scored 29 in AQ test.) We have a lot in common and don't argue very much. I don't think I can live with a truly average NT person. He says he doesn't want a truly "typical" woman either.

Hi I'm 48 and married to a NT guy, but he is left handed and dyslexic, so has an inkling of how the world can be a strange place.

He is finding it easier since my "diagnosis" - since I'm self diagnosed. He seems a little more considerate of my quirks. He says he would be bored to tears with a "normal" person.

I think this is one of my least disruptive revelations...coming after coming out as a lesbian and transgender!

But we are still together, and determined to make some success of our marriage as we are still in love despite everything. Of course we have a lot of issues, so that's why I'm on here trying to find answers with likeminded souls.

He does get a little bored with my latest aha moment..."that's why I'm always doing..."

I was married for 17 years to an NT man. For most of that time, I considered it a good marriage. Neither of us had ever heard of Asperger's, but he recognized that I was different, and for the most part, accepted it. We had two beautiful daughters and I could have gone on like that forever, I think, until the day I found love notes from another woman in his pocket.

I don't know why I'm telling about this, really. I'm not saying his behavior is typical of NT men or that it had anything to do with my AS, necessarily. But I know this ... no negative AS experience in my entire life ever came close to being as devastating as the feeling of betrayal I felt that day.

My life is back in order now. I've discovered that being single in your 40's is not a bad thing at all. He and I are cordial, for the most part. I don't hate the sound of his name anymore, and we actually have some reasonably pleasant moments together, mostly in connection with the kids. The funny thing is that he now wants to get back together. My response? "Are you nuts?"