Letting abusive parents go

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I had recently gotten an e-mail from my mother this afternoon basically harassing people about the endtimes in Christian prophecy. She goes around and harassess people nonstop about The Bible and all the bad things that will happen to those who sin and how she is a good Christian. She also has a very bad fly mouth and pops off whatever she wants to people until they want to attack her. So I sent her an e-mail and asked her not to contact me anymore if all she was going to send in her e-mail were negative religious things and that I really didn't feel like hearing since it didn't seem to mean anything to me and that she was acting more like a fanatic than a Christian. In response, my Mother wrote back and she said that God loves me more than she does and then went on to ask me how school was going and I didn't really feel like responding back if she was going to feel that way towards me. She has also called me her punishment, embarassment of the family, or that she really doesn't owe me a thing and has often compared me to my younger sister and always mananges to put me down and has also used me for things in the past.

On the other hand, you have my Dad who has a very bad temper and he has been known to also put someone down whenever he feels like it and has used profane words with people whenever they confront him back or for no reason at all. There has been a lot of verbal and some physical abuse from him and my mother as well. He has managed to say, "Shame on you for talking to your mother like that, just who in the world do you think you are?" I wrote back to him and mentioned that I appreciated his concerns but that he had no right to talk to me that way and that if he was going to swear at me in the next e-mail not to respond because I wasn't taking it anymore.

Has anyone else in here who has matured fully ever been in the same boat that I am in?

I had some issues with my dad but I've got 2 good moms, so I can't relate too much if at all . But if I were you, I'd just delete/ignore all negative comments/messages you get from them and decide if while doing that what kind of contact (if any) you can handle with them w/o having your self esteem crushed more than it already has been.

hi MIYAH....sorry about your problem. it is possible to let go.

my mother was severely manic-depressive and was not capable of taking care of me as a child. i felt like i never knew her. my father literally hated me and did everything he could to hurt me, in every way possible. as a young child i ended up with a grandmother who was schizophrenic who did all sorts of bizarre things to me. i never felt loved or even liked. as strange as it seems, i never had even the shortest conversation with a family member.

it has been hard to try to come to grips with what happened to me as a kid...and i haven't. can't, too much damage.

let them go. do not let them drag you through their craziness any longer. you are not anyone's punishment. i was much better off when i finally broke free at 17 and joined the military right after high school. it was the perfect thing for me to do and gave me a new grip on what somewhat nominal people are like.

they're both dead now. did not feel a thing when i found out they had died. did not go to the funerals. they were strangers to me. they had always been strangers to me.

don't let your parents destroy you like mine did me. save yourself. it's a big step and you must be certain. do you have someone you can talk to about this? someone who is not caught up in religious fanaticism. good luck.

I feel like wanting to write nasty threatening comments to her about that she is a fat cow and how she is as ugly and masculine as a lesbian. I also would love to mention that I think her favorite daughter is a slut and a failure like her mother and that the three of them can rot. I also have thoughts of writing them threatening e-mails or even sending them telephone pranks and making fun them.

However, I told me mom in another e-mail that I am not the same person anymore and I am not letting her walk all over me. I also told her that I didn't appreciate her openly telling me that she doesn't love me that much and that really hurt. I also mentioned that I am not the same person that I was 10 years ago for her to cut down every time she had some insecurity about herself. Finally, I told her that I wasn't her scape goat for her to take things out on and that I didn't care to be compared to my sister who I also do not get along with.

My dad is schizophrenic, and abused me greatly when I was a kid. I live on my parents' property now, have for 5 years, and he still screams at me. I try not to let it affect me too badly, since his bad karma is biting him in the butt big time now. I have a good relationship with my mom, but she's always been smothering, she views me as a helpless little baby and wants to protect me from the big bad world. She whines and complains whenever I want to assert my independence. I try sending her articles about disabled people who were never allowed to grow up and be independent and who now live on the streets since their parents are dead, and she says she understands, but she can't stop. Not at 65. I really need to get away from them but rent is too expensive here, and I live on SSI. I will have to earn some income first, and I've failed at everything I've tried.

I live alone and I used to deal with their abuse for years and I let them control my emotions for years and let them walk all over me. I just got tired of letting them walk all over me and talk any way that they want. They get everyone mad at them and it's aways been the other person's fault for years and never their own. My mom, for example, gets someone mad at her and you try to tell her to stop and she just will not shut up or even listen. I had told her not to send me those e-mails and she didn't listen. She had also responded by telling me that God loved me more than she did which I thought was a little odd.

They are both as F'N nutz as mine are. I stay away from them because since I have been doing so, I NEVER want to commit suicide. Before I wanted to kill myself every day of my life.