Moromillas wrote:
League_Girl wrote:
Moromillas wrote:
Nonperson wrote:
I'm not saying the captain was right, but:
"“I just kind of said, ‘You know what? Maybe after she has a meltdown and she’s crying and trying to scratch, then you’ll help us,'” Beegle told the station."
This was incredibly stupid on her part. After 15 years this mom should realize that threatening others with your autistic child's behavior is a really bad idea. Hell, even someone without an autistic kid should realize that. And yes, it would only possibly be taken as a threat in that context: "give me what I ask for or my daughter will misbehave!". It's a completely irresponsible thing for any parent to say. Other people hold you responsible for your kid's behavior, and won't respond positively to a parent who tries to shift that responsibility. I'm autistic and I realize that!
NT parents can be so stupid sometimes. I get the impression they're just trapped in this view of themselves as martyrs to their autistic offspring and the rest of the world somehow owing them - the parents - special treatment. Autistic people don't have a right to get violent on planes if we don't like the meal, and I doubt anyone here would say we do, but that seems to be what this mom was thinking when she made threats on her daughter's behalf. It's disgusting.
Except that quote is not a threat, but something that elicits sympathy...
“I just kind of said, ‘You know what? Maybe after she has a meltdown and she’s crying and trying to scratch, then you’ll help us,'” Beegle told the station.
Has a VERY different context to...
"give me what I ask for or my daughter will misbehave!"
Yes it was stupid for her to say that, but it shouldn't be stupid to talk about that stuff. The same can be said for alluding to being gay, many years ago. Yes it's quite stupid, but it shouldn't be stupid.
I used to do the same thing as you. Say something and deny saying the other because I did not say that. For example I would tell my brother he is chubby and then say I never said he is fat, I said he is chubby. Or the time I said in 7th grade I wish I could slap the art teacher and I got a day of suspension for that threat. I said I never said I will slap her I said I wished I could.
Now I realize there are different ways of saying things that mean the same thing.
There is no mincing of words, there simply isn't a threat here. That's why the family was so shocked and befuddled when they were kicked off, because they made no threat.
The hedging is coming from people that want to believe it's a threat, contrary to the facts.
People seem interested in gross misquoting, well here's an analogy that's comparable:
"Perhaps after someone slips and cracks their head on the tiles, then you'll put down a wet floor sign."
OMG! They're threatening to make people fall over, to crack their heads open! Er, no ... no they're not, that's nonsense.
In no other situation would that phrasing be considered a threat. Yet when you mention anything AS related, it's suddenly a cause for alarm. All you have to do is mention stimming along with the word 'meltdown' and that's more than enough for people to warp reality, and distort the facts into a situation where AS people are going to become violent and someone is going to get hurt, and it's disgusting. Disgusting and monstrous that they can't even check what the family meant by scratch and meltdown should they not know what she's talking about. No, they just assume, then make up their own definitions, and their own context. Just fill in the blanks with made up crap, so you can use it to discriminate. Or worse still, get the idea from the various propaganda sites that portray a meltdown as a kind of Berserker trance.
That actually does sound like a threat to me.
And while I think "Perhaps after someone slips and cracks their head on the tiles, then you'll put down a wet floor sign." DOES essentially mean the same thing as "If you don't put a wet floor sign down, people are going to slip and crack their heads on the tiles", I actually find the first one to be MORE threatening than the second one because it strikes me as passive aggressive. Maybe "threat" is *NOT* literally the right word, but it's definitely passive aggressive and has an unpleasant tone.
Please think twice about telling me that I "don't have the capacity to understand what's going on here" (as you told jrjones). I'm not an expert on logical fallacies, but that strikes me as an ad hominem attack, which is something you are accusing others of doing. It is possible for two intelligent people to disagree.
*I added the word "not" with stars around it- it was a typo.
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Mum to two awesome kids on the spectrum (16 and 13 years old).
20 May 2015, 8:57 pm
