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Sweetleaf
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25 Jun 2011, 7:49 pm

Gallowglass wrote:
If you think you are cr*p people will treat you as such.

If you think you are good people will treat you as such.

Having a high perception of your worth is good for you and helps you to be successful.


I am crap by this societies standards, think about what people refer to as trailer trash sure my parents finally got an actual house before they divorced but that is how I grew up. I'm just not in denial about it like my mom is and I have not managed to make it out of that like my younger sister.......I don't have a job and I'm going to college with loans and grants, because I don't know how else to make a living right now. But the funny thing is people where treating me like crap before I was old enough to make any judgements about myself......so I think your theory is a little bit flawed.

And I am not sure what your definition of sucess is but mine may be a little bit different.



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25 Jun 2011, 8:39 pm

Sweetleaf wrote:
Gallowglass wrote:
If you think you are cr*p people will treat you as such.

If you think you are good people will treat you as such.

Having a high perception of your worth is good for you and helps you to be successful.


I am crap by this societies standards, think about what people refer to as trailer trash sure my parents finally got an actual house before they divorced but that is how I grew up. I'm just not in denial about it like my mom is and I have not managed to make it out of that like my younger sister.......I don't have a job and I'm going to college with loans and grants, because I don't know how else to make a living right now. But the funny thing is people where treating me like crap before I was old enough to make any judgements about myself......so I think your theory is a little bit flawed.

And I am not sure what your definition of sucess is but mine may be a little bit different.


Perhaps what Sweetleaf was getting at is that if you b!tch and moan about your circumstances, and say your life is unfair, or if you think you don't deserve better than you have because you're not smart enough etc etc, people will pick up on that. And they'll treat you accordingly.

Growing up in a trailer park and being treated poorly because of it isn't fair. But if you carry it around with you like old stinky baggage (even when you've moved away from the trailer park) people will smell it on you and treat you like you still are (in their minds) trailer trash.

If you leave it behind you, and acknowledge you have the chance for a fresh start and that you deserve it because of all of the work you've put in to work / school / etc., people will sense that you deserve your place in the world (or more) and will treat you accordingly.



Gallowglass
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25 Jun 2011, 8:58 pm

Sweetleaf wrote:
Gallowglass wrote:
If you think you are cr*p people will treat you as such.

If you think you are good people will treat you as such.

Having a high perception of your worth is good for you and helps you to be successful.


I am crap by this societies standards, think about what people refer to as trailer trash sure my parents finally got an actual house before they divorced but that is how I grew up. I'm just not in denial about it like my mom is and I have not managed to make it out of that like my younger sister.......I don't have a job and I'm going to college with loans and grants, because I don't know how else to make a living right now. But the funny thing is people where treating me like crap before I was old enough to make any judgements about myself......so I think your theory is a little bit flawed.

And I am not sure what your definition of sucess is but mine may be a little bit different.


Starting in a trailer park and going to college and making a success of your life and sounds a bit like the American dream to me.

Stop putting yourself down!

I grew up in similar circumstances, broken home, foster care, young offender institutions but it did not stop me!



Sweetleaf
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25 Jun 2011, 9:03 pm

cave_canem wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
Gallowglass wrote:
If you think you are cr*p people will treat you as such.

If you think you are good people will treat you as such.

Having a high perception of your worth is good for you and helps you to be successful.


I am crap by this societies standards, think about what people refer to as trailer trash sure my parents finally got an actual house before they divorced but that is how I grew up. I'm just not in denial about it like my mom is and I have not managed to make it out of that like my younger sister.......I don't have a job and I'm going to college with loans and grants, because I don't know how else to make a living right now. But the funny thing is people where treating me like crap before I was old enough to make any judgements about myself......so I think your theory is a little bit flawed.

And I am not sure what your definition of sucess is but mine may be a little bit different.


Perhaps what Sweetleaf was getting at is that if you b!tch and moan about your circumstances, and say your life is unfair, or if you think you don't deserve better than you have because you're not smart enough etc etc, people will pick up on that. And they'll treat you accordingly.

Growing up in a trailer park and being treated poorly because of it isn't fair. But if you carry it around with you like old stinky baggage (even when you've moved away from the trailer park) people will smell it on you and treat you like you still are (in their minds) trailer trash.

If you leave it behind you, and acknowledge you have the chance for a fresh start and that you deserve it because of all of the work you've put in to work / school / etc., people will sense that you deserve your place in the world (or more) and will treat you accordingly.


Well that is not the only thing and its not like we kept the place filthy or anything but yeah it was rather obvious that I my family had financial problems.....I also got picked on for being socially akward, and coming off as a bit unusual. And I really don't feel like there will much chance for a fresh start I already tried that by going to college, dropping out of college to try and find work and now being back in college because there was no work and I needed some form of income. I don't really have any skills that are very useful and even when I do I don't have the resources or knowledge to find out how to get into any jobs I might want.



Sweetleaf
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25 Jun 2011, 9:06 pm

Gallowglass wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
Gallowglass wrote:
If you think you are cr*p people will treat you as such.

If you think you are good people will treat you as such.

Having a high perception of your worth is good for you and helps you to be successful.


I am crap by this societies standards, think about what people refer to as trailer trash sure my parents finally got an actual house before they divorced but that is how I grew up. I'm just not in denial about it like my mom is and I have not managed to make it out of that like my younger sister.......I don't have a job and I'm going to college with loans and grants, because I don't know how else to make a living right now. But the funny thing is people where treating me like crap before I was old enough to make any judgements about myself......so I think your theory is a little bit flawed.

And I am not sure what your definition of sucess is but mine may be a little bit different.


Starting in a trailer park and going to college and making a success of your life and sounds a bit like the American dream to me.

Stop putting yourself down!

I grew up in similar circumstances, broken home, foster care, young offender institutions but it did not stop me!


I don't think you understand, I am likely to have no way of paying back the loans I've taken out for college.....it feels more like I am kind of trapped doing something that is not going to really benifit me that much but I don't want to drop out because I don't have a job or anything. If I found a job and especially one I thought I could keep I would think about dropping out to be honest. So yeah I am not making any sort of sucess of my life.



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25 Jun 2011, 9:16 pm

Sweetleaf wrote:
Gallowglass wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
Gallowglass wrote:
If you think you are cr*p people will treat you as such.

If you think you are good people will treat you as such.

Having a high perception of your worth is good for you and helps you to be successful.


I am crap by this societies standards, think about what people refer to as trailer trash sure my parents finally got an actual house before they divorced but that is how I grew up. I'm just not in denial about it like my mom is and I have not managed to make it out of that like my younger sister.......I don't have a job and I'm going to college with loans and grants, because I don't know how else to make a living right now. But the funny thing is people where treating me like crap before I was old enough to make any judgements about myself......so I think your theory is a little bit flawed.

And I am not sure what your definition of sucess is but mine may be a little bit different.


Starting in a trailer park and going to college and making a success of your life and sounds a bit like the American dream to me.

Stop putting yourself down!

I grew up in similar circumstances, broken home, foster care, young offender institutions but it did not stop me!


I don't think you understand, I am likely to have no way of paying back the loans I've taken out for college.....it feels more like I am kind of trapped doing something that is not going to really benifit me that much but I don't want to drop out because I don't have a job or anything. If I found a job and especially one I thought I could keep I would think about dropping out to be honest. So yeah I am not making any sort of sucess of my life.


Try being a bit kinder to yourself.

Are you in jail? No
Have you got five kids by different fathers? No
Are you a drug addict? No
Is it realistic to expect to get a good job without a degree or a completed apprenticeship? No
Are you trying to get ahead? Yes
You are 21 nobody has money at 21 (unless you are a sports or rock star) and you need to complete a degree or apprenticeship to make money.
I served an apprenticeship as a plasterer and made a good living from that but I was on crap money until I was 23.
Things will come good if you believe in yourself and keep going.You need to see yourself as others see you instead of listening to, and believing the negative loop tape that is running in your head.
The best advice I ever got was "you need to change your internal dialogue".



Sweetleaf
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25 Jun 2011, 9:24 pm

Gallowglass wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
Gallowglass wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
Gallowglass wrote:
If you think you are cr*p people will treat you as such.

If you think you are good people will treat you as such.

Having a high perception of your worth is good for you and helps you to be successful.


I am crap by this societies standards, think about what people refer to as trailer trash sure my parents finally got an actual house before they divorced but that is how I grew up. I'm just not in denial about it like my mom is and I have not managed to make it out of that like my younger sister.......I don't have a job and I'm going to college with loans and grants, because I don't know how else to make a living right now. But the funny thing is people where treating me like crap before I was old enough to make any judgements about myself......so I think your theory is a little bit flawed.

And I am not sure what your definition of sucess is but mine may be a little bit different.


Starting in a trailer park and going to college and making a success of your life and sounds a bit like the American dream to me.

Stop putting yourself down!

I grew up in similar circumstances, broken home, foster care, young offender institutions but it did not stop me!


I don't think you understand, I am likely to have no way of paying back the loans I've taken out for college.....it feels more like I am kind of trapped doing something that is not going to really benifit me that much but I don't want to drop out because I don't have a job or anything. If I found a job and especially one I thought I could keep I would think about dropping out to be honest. So yeah I am not making any sort of sucess of my life.


Try being a bit kinder to yourself.

Are you in jail? No
Have you got five kids by different fathers? No
Are you a drug addict? No
Is it realistic to expect to get a good job without a degree or a completed apprenticeship? No
Are you trying to get ahead? Yes
You are 21 nobody has money at 21 (unless you are a sports or rock star) and you need to complete a degree or apprenticeship to make money.
I served an apprenticeship as a plasterer and made a good living from that but I was on crap money until I was 23.
Things will come good if you believe in yourself and keep going.You need to see yourself as others see you instead of listening to, and believing the negative loop tape that is running in your head.
The best advice I ever got was "you need to change your internal dialogue".


Well I could be in jail as I use cannabis, but I need to relieve the depression and anxiety and PTSD related things...as for getting ahead what is there to get ahead of, wealth is not something I crave. And actually a lot of people are graduating from college and finding no work because there is a job shortage and I certainly have no competitive drive going for me. I don't want what society sees as sucess, but at the same time how else is one supposed to survive in this society if they don't make it there? it's just very frusterating



cave_canem
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25 Jun 2011, 9:25 pm

Sweetleaf wrote:
I don't think you understand, I am likely to have no way of paying back the loans I've taken out for college.....it feels more like I am kind of trapped doing something that is not going to really benifit me that much but I don't want to drop out because I don't have a job or anything. If I found a job and especially one I thought I could keep I would think about dropping out to be honest. So yeah I am not making any sort of sucess of my life.


It sounds as though you are making excuses.

It is true that I don't know your situation fully, but it sounds to me like you have already decided that you will "fail" - never get a good job, never pay back your loans, never find usefulness in your education. Have you heard of self-fulfilling prophecies?

There are many things you may be able to look into. Becoming a skilled tradesperson may be an option - a plumber, electrician, welder. You can get paid apprenticeships, and once that's complete, transition into a full time career.

What about joining the armed forces? I'm not sure what it is like where you live (I assume in the US) but in Canada you can go to the Royal Military College free of charge provided you agree to join the armed forces for a certain period (5 years maybe?) after you graduate. An option such as this would eliminate student debt, and guarantee you a job after your schooling.

Your current situation may not be "fair" when you look at others around you, but you can't compare yourself to anyone else. All you can do is focus on making the best of what you have. If you spend your life concentrating on what you don't have, you'll never see what you do have.



Gallowglass
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25 Jun 2011, 9:26 pm

Just do your best, its all any of us can do and a bit of 'erb don't make you a crim lol



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25 Jun 2011, 9:28 pm

androbot2084 wrote:
I once had an English teacher that boasted that he would blackball any student that plagiarized Shakespeare. However Romeo and Juliet was a plagiarism of Samson and Delilah.


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pyramus_and_Thisbe

Wrong story, bro.


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Sweetleaf
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25 Jun 2011, 9:32 pm

cave_canem wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
I don't think you understand, I am likely to have no way of paying back the loans I've taken out for college.....it feels more like I am kind of trapped doing something that is not going to really benifit me that much but I don't want to drop out because I don't have a job or anything. If I found a job and especially one I thought I could keep I would think about dropping out to be honest. So yeah I am not making any sort of sucess of my life.


It sounds as though you are making excuses.

It is true that I don't know your situation fully, but it sounds to me like you have already decided that you will "fail" - never get a good job, never pay back your loans, never find usefulness in your education. Have you heard of self-fulfilling prophecies?

There are many things you may be able to look into. Becoming a skilled tradesperson may be an option - a plumber, electrician, welder. You can get paid apprenticeships, and once that's complete, transition into a full time career.

What about joining the armed forces? I'm not sure what it is like where you live (I assume in the US) but in Canada you can go to the Royal Military College free of charge provided you agree to join the armed forces for a certain period (5 years maybe?) after you graduate. An option such as this would eliminate student debt, and guarantee you a job after your schooling.

Your current situation may not be "fair" when you look at others around you, but you can't compare yourself to anyone else. All you can do is focus on making the best of what you have. If you spend your life concentrating on what you don't have, you'll never see what you do have.


Well I guess I cannot fathom how I will get a good job with my social akwardness, lack of competativeness and general dislike for the corporate world not to mention there is not a specific trade I am any good at. Also you are getting the wrong idea I don't care about what I don't have there is not even a lot I want I am just frusterated that with all my intelligence I cannot think of any other way to afford to live other then giving into that.



Sweetleaf
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25 Jun 2011, 9:33 pm

Gallowglass wrote:
Just do your best, its all any of us can do and a bit of 'erb don't make you a crim lol


Well I agree, but my best just does not seem to be good enough for survival in this twisted society we have.



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25 Jun 2011, 9:35 pm

Sweetleaf wrote:
cave_canem wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
I don't think you understand, I am likely to have no way of paying back the loans I've taken out for college.....it feels more like I am kind of trapped doing something that is not going to really benifit me that much but I don't want to drop out because I don't have a job or anything. If I found a job and especially one I thought I could keep I would think about dropping out to be honest. So yeah I am not making any sort of sucess of my life.


It sounds as though you are making excuses.

It is true that I don't know your situation fully, but it sounds to me like you have already decided that you will "fail" - never get a good job, never pay back your loans, never find usefulness in your education. Have you heard of self-fulfilling prophecies?

There are many things you may be able to look into. Becoming a skilled tradesperson may be an option - a plumber, electrician, welder. You can get paid apprenticeships, and once that's complete, transition into a full time career.

What about joining the armed forces? I'm not sure what it is like where you live (I assume in the US) but in Canada you can go to the Royal Military College free of charge provided you agree to join the armed forces for a certain period (5 years maybe?) after you graduate. An option such as this would eliminate student debt, and guarantee you a job after your schooling.

Your current situation may not be "fair" when you look at others around you, but you can't compare yourself to anyone else. All you can do is focus on making the best of what you have. If you spend your life concentrating on what you don't have, you'll never see what you do have.


Well I guess I cannot fathom how I will get a good job with my social akwardness, lack of competativeness and general dislike for the corporate world not to mention there is not a specific trade I am any good at. Also you are getting the wrong idea I don't care about what I don't have there is not even a lot I want I am just frusterated that with all my intelligence I cannot think of any other way to afford to live other then giving into that.


My best mate is an accountant with aspergers and he suffers from all that but he makes $350K(200k UK) per annum.



Sweetleaf
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25 Jun 2011, 9:40 pm

Gallowglass wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
cave_canem wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
I don't think you understand, I am likely to have no way of paying back the loans I've taken out for college.....it feels more like I am kind of trapped doing something that is not going to really benifit me that much but I don't want to drop out because I don't have a job or anything. If I found a job and especially one I thought I could keep I would think about dropping out to be honest. So yeah I am not making any sort of sucess of my life.


It sounds as though you are making excuses.

It is true that I don't know your situation fully, but it sounds to me like you have already decided that you will "fail" - never get a good job, never pay back your loans, never find usefulness in your education. Have you heard of self-fulfilling prophecies?

There are many things you may be able to look into. Becoming a skilled tradesperson may be an option - a plumber, electrician, welder. You can get paid apprenticeships, and once that's complete, transition into a full time career.

What about joining the armed forces? I'm not sure what it is like where you live (I assume in the US) but in Canada you can go to the Royal Military College free of charge provided you agree to join the armed forces for a certain period (5 years maybe?) after you graduate. An option such as this would eliminate student debt, and guarantee you a job after your schooling.

Your current situation may not be "fair" when you look at others around you, but you can't compare yourself to anyone else. All you can do is focus on making the best of what you have. If you spend your life concentrating on what you don't have, you'll never see what you do have.


Well I guess I cannot fathom how I will get a good job with my social akwardness, lack of competativeness and general dislike for the corporate world not to mention there is not a specific trade I am any good at. Also you are getting the wrong idea I don't care about what I don't have there is not even a lot I want I am just frusterated that with all my intelligence I cannot think of any other way to afford to live other then giving into that.


My best mate is an accountant with aspergers and he suffers from all that but he makes $350K(200k UK) per annum.


I think I am already depressed enough as it is, a job like that would not help matters......but I am sure at some point I will figure something out.



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25 Jun 2011, 9:42 pm

Sweetleaf wrote:
Well I guess I cannot fathom how I will get a good job with my social akwardness, lack of competativeness and general dislike for the corporate world not to mention there is not a specific trade I am any good at. Also you are getting the wrong idea I don't care about what I don't have there is not even a lot I want I am just frusterated that with all my intelligence I cannot think of any other way to afford to live other then giving into that.


You are talking to a bunch of people who suffer from social akwardness. You are still very young - believe me when i tell you that it gets better over time, but only if you force yourself into those akward situations - such as working in an office / jobsite with other people.

I too have a general dislike for corporations (mostly the corporate greed I see all too often).

But to get a job that pays a decent salary, you have to suck it up and deal with it. When it comes to either a) making an anti-corporation statement by not playing by their "rules" (and thus not having a job), or b) adapting to it so that I can feed my family... I'll choose (b) any day.

And you do care about making money, because you have brought up the fact that you have all of these student loans to pay off. Also, you clearly want out of the "trailer park" because you don't want to continually be labelled as "crap" by society.

Wanting to make a decent living is not the same as wanting to be a billionaire.



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25 Jun 2011, 9:44 pm

cave_canem wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
Well I guess I cannot fathom how I will get a good job with my social akwardness, lack of competativeness and general dislike for the corporate world not to mention there is not a specific trade I am any good at. Also you are getting the wrong idea I don't care about what I don't have there is not even a lot I want I am just frusterated that with all my intelligence I cannot think of any other way to afford to live other then giving into that.


You are talking to a bunch of people who suffer from social akwardness. You are still very young - believe me when i tell you that it gets better over time, but only if you force yourself into those akward situations - such as working in an office / jobsite with other people.

I too have a general dislike for corporations (mostly the corporate greed I see all too often).

But to get a job that pays a decent salary, you have to suck it up and deal with it. When it comes to either a) making an anti-corporation statement by not playing by their "rules" (and thus not having a job), or b) adapting to it so that I can feed my family... I'll choose (b) any day.

And you do care about making money, because you have brought up the fact that you have all of these student loans to pay off. Also, you clearly want out of the "trailer park" because you don't want to continually be labelled as "crap" by society.

Wanting to make a decent living is not the same as wanting to be a billionaire.


What "beware of the dog" said!