eating disorders

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I have problems with binge eating. 1ce I start eating it's hard for me to stop if it's food I like. I make a pig of myself & it's one of the reasons why I've gained weight & why my blood sugar & cholesterol are kinda high. I was a very picky eater as a kid & teen(I still am but I was worse) & I would eat only one big meal a day because the food I wanted wasn't available. I'm eating 3x a day nowadays partly because of meds & supplements I take & because I get more of the food I want but I still have that tendency to eat too much when I eat. I didn't have a binge eating problem when I 1st started eating 3 meals a day but after a couple years I fell back into my old habits. It doesn't help that my girlfriend has depression & eating is a comfort thing for her. Her eating snacks makes me want to eat even if I just at a meal or other snacks. I really lack self-control 1ce I started binge eating again & the habit is hard to break. I really need to try & work on this more for my health before I get put on meds for cholesterol & diabetes.

i've been Dxed anorexia nervosa type 1 a few years ago...currently i am weight restored.

when i was a kid ages about 9-12 i started purging. i didn't realize what i was doing was disordered at the time, though. i was a gymnast and really intense about it. things were also rough at home and there was some extraneous abuse as well. controlling my own sickness was a sick comfort i guess.

funny thing is after i stopped i became emetephobic.

i can list a few reasons why i think my ED and my AS feed each other.
-food sensory issues
-deep, obsessive focus
-need to do things the "right"
way, habitual
-the numbing effect of starvation
-being small is much more comfortable and from an external perspective, being small makes people accept my awkwardness more