body odor and insane stress preventing job-retention

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I've had this problem with body odor for over the past ten years. It's been at the point where I'll be nervous simply going out to the store. People give me the usual signals, which I can only imagine are strong because the odor is every bit as much. I started having this problem as a chronic condition when I turned eighteen. People began sneezing, gagging, or coughing around me. My hygiene is fine, I'm not as idiotic as I feel when I'm going to work and people treat me like a ret*d. I know all the areas to soap up and clean in order. I use deodorant, my oral hygiene is okay. Sometimes I don't even feel like taking care of myself because when I do the reactions don't lessen in intensity at all. I do sweat very excessively, but I don't think this is the main source of the odor.

This is all compounded by a catastrophically dismal set of social skills. I just can't hack it among other people. Too much of it just drives me insane, and my family was so counting on me making it this time.

I'm pretty much at my wits end, having gone off the job in a nervous fit. I'm at the point where I no longer see the point of criticizing myself for my being devoid of work ethic since I never can hack it among real people.

How's your diet?

One POSSIBLE thing, too, I don't know if it'll work necessarily for you, but for some people it does. Cut out soap and/or shampoo, and just take an extra long shower with water. For some people, the soap strips off too much natural oils and whatnot, and your body makes too much to compensate for them being chemically stripped off. Again, some people have good results, some don't, IE, I've not used soap in the shower in about a year now (outside of removing grease from car work) and I've got less back acne than I used to. It's something to consider, not gonna work for EVERYONE, but it's a possibility to try. Just make sure to shower with water everyday, and usually extra long.

Worst case scenario, to cover your odors up, that's why there's cologne. Some people will complain your cologne is too strong, but at least you won't stink as much.

have you seen a doctor about the odor?

Knives: I've heard that tip too, to wash with only water and all the natural hygiene stuff. I'm pretty well read on it all. I've considered dieting and fasting, but the lack of results after a few months or days of either respectively, I just go with food that makes me happy.

As for the cologne, if you have a body odor that can be detected at over ten feet's distance, it isn't going to do much. It was one of the first things I tried when this problem was relatively new. This is going to sound funny, but the cologne seems to turn into a airborne delivery mechanism for the odor, intensifying it and carrying it all at once. I wonder if weaponized BO would have military applications

Cathy: I've seen doctors, some psychiatrists as well as general practitioners. They all deny that there is an odor, but I get clear signals still even at the doctor's office that it is present. I can't really say they're lying, and I don't know afterall, but I've gotten to where I think they possibly need more information from me before they can help. I've even been diagnosed with schizophrenia, and if I wasn't before all of this weird medical practice mumbo-jumbo has me on the edge of being schizo. There's almost nobody I trust, and the trust is even less when it comes to the medical practice, which is a contradiction given how much I have to go to them. I've become much less rational ever since this was getting to be a problem, and now I feel like a total dolt.

Why would all the professionals deny the odor if it was really there? Has anyone ever actually told you there was an odor? Is it possible you're misinterpreting the signals from people? I don't want to say I don't believe you or anything, I'm just trying to understand.

Medical professionals take an oath to do no harm, and are ethically forbidden to lie to patients. I find it very hard to believe that multiple doctors would lie to you like that.

I'm wondering if there is something else going on or if your misinterpreting whats going on.

Now that I've calmed down a bit, I can take more time to think for a reply. Thanks for the comments all, I appreciate them.

I'll start with the initial part, how I'm convinced I have a persistent odor. I think I mentioned the signs people give when I get close or open my mouth to speak. They cover their faces or act like they can't breathe. Sometimes I'll hear someone say behind me, "What's that smell?" And another will go "It's that guy." Since I don't smell anything unusual myself, I can only deduce that maybe they're referring to me (persistent odors lessen in intensity with time of exposure, eventually you get used to it and you won't even know if you have it.). I do have problems with hyperhydrosis, but the quality of feedback, as voluminous and vehement as it has been, leaves me with little to consider in the way of details. Sometimes they'll hint at a crappy, sewage smell, so I guess that's what it is like. I've tried colon cleansing products, probiotics, long-term changes of diet (I went vegetarian for a year, although a few months before breaking it began taking dairy again.). The diet seemed to help a bit with the odor although not completely eliminating it, and of course I had crazy amounts of energy compared to before.

In response to the doubt about doctors lying, I used to think I would be able to trust a doctor to be up-front about this, too. It took me four years to work up the courage to even ask a doctor about the body odor issue, and when I did she looked aside and gave a pointed shrug and expression to say she didn't notice anything. I think if a doctor thinks telling the truth will have a harmful effect, the Hippocratic oath may go the other way. To me, having lived an irresponsibly reckless adulthood, getting hired and quickly fired or quit and on welfare for most of the time, I can see how harmful being left in doubt is to me. I simply can't get past the signals I get from people on a daily basis. It just seems unlikely that I'm misreading these signals when they've been clear short of telling me point blank to my face that I stink. I really hope for the day that someone says with kindness that I have this problem. But since I've known it for sure all this time, and been unable to solve it, who's to say I'd make the most of that?

I just need a job or way of making money where I don't have to stay in the same location with people for an extended time. I have potential and some intelligence (though I'm rather slow and clumsy when it comes to physical work) that I'm wasting. And I really can't stand that I consistently let my family down after getting their hopes up. I'm gradually destroying myself, and approaching a point where I won't be able to fix my situation at all.

Okay, that sounds like a solid and valid poker read to me.

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Reading your post kind of put me in mind to share something perhaps similar about myself (similar in that it leads to some degree of social exclusion)

I have a nasal voice, perhaps like people speak in Boston or France. Enough particular incidents have occurred to convince me that some people classify me as a "flamer" (flayboyantly gay, or in flamingly gay). Whereas I don't think a nasal voice is a stereotypical "gay" voice at all, but apparently 25% (?) of people seem to make this classification.

Some people don't notice my voice, and yet a third group of people think it's kind of neat (I think). I do support full and equal rights for gay, lesbian, and transgendered persons, I just don't happen to be gay myself. I think if I was gay, I'd still object to this blatant, one-dimensional, and inaccurate stereotyping.

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Everyone's body chemistry being a little different, it seems to me that a series of medium scale experiments may be your best bet. Different deodorants, antiperspirants, even the detergent you wash you clothes in (residue might intereact with body chemistry).

I'm sorry doctors have not been helpful. Some doctors can't talk worth sh*t and can't listen worth sh*t and that's just the fact of the matter. And then I think they get in this mindset that since it's not a strictly speaking quote "medical" problem, it's a waste of their time. Of course it wouldn't be a waste of their time. It would be something that would significantly improve the quality of your life. Sometime a doctor only wants to focus on the main stated purpose of the visit, and isn't open when the patient brings up other things (obviously, the doctor should be, for these other things may be among the most important).

There might be some positive upside to scheduling a visit with a general practitioner (now often called family practitioner) or an internist, where the specific purpose of the visit is listed as body odor. Or it might be another dead end. And you'd have to feel comfortable spending the co-pay or the money for the visit whichever way it goes.

And perhaps even Asian medicine as an adjunct. Now, I do believe in Western medicine, but as an additional track to run, sure, and the Asian practitioner may listen to you longer and may be more open to these medium scale experiments.

I have both struggled with jobs and have had my successes. Right now, it's a low ebb and I'm unemployed. I'd be happy to talk more about jobs if you're interested.

I know there's a lot of sweat glands in the groin area between the anus and the genitals, the area I heard an acting coach call the 'twain't'. And if a person sits a lot on a favorite pillow, the pillow often gets this smell. I mean, what it is, is what it is.

In addition, E. coli is one the (?) neutral or harmful bacteria in the human intestines (and I'm sure you know many perhaps most of the bacteria in the human gut are in fact helpful). It seems to me that it would be entirely possible for E. coli to colonize the outside of the body and live off these active sweat glands.

Besides some kind of antibiotic soap or cream which might kill these bacteria (or might not), another strategy might be another version of the probiotic strategy. For even if you get rid of one bacteria, this real estate won't be empty for long. Might as well plan what friendly bacteria you want living there who will also help keep out other bacteria.

Thanks for the advice Aardvark, I appreciate the long, well-thought out response. I think I'm going to try and do without soap for now, and take longer showers. I've been doing that the past few days and if it makes no measurable impact on my scent at least I'm feeling a bit cleaner. I do tend to get stronger reactions when I use soap, especially body wash.

Right now though, the emergency is my job situation. This problem, compounded with some difficulties at work, and general paranoia prompted me to simply leave my job in the middle of a shift. And then I took an absence the next day. I'm not fired/quit just yet, but I feel like I can't do this job. There's just so much involved and it's incredibly physically demanding. I thought I would want to do jobs online if it's at all possible, so that this problem highlighted here wouldn't be much of an issue unless I meet a client in person. I wanted to be a freelance writer, or some such. Possibly publish a novella on smashwords to see if that can generate me some money. The problem is that I have trouble sometimes organizing my thoughts, which isn't exactly conducive to long-inducted projects.

You're welcome. Glad I was able to potentially help, if only a little. I try to be a pretty good listener, although I can at times end up laser-beaming on my own particular topics.

Okay, well, it sounds like this job is probably at an end. Maybe if you could leave with a single vague "family situation" (even if it is a face-saving lie) rather than several reasons, even if the several reasons is inevitably real life. With the goal of being able to use them as a reference in the future.

I wish you all the best at art. I myself have tried my hand at screenwriting and novel writing, even though I think I'm at my best on short journalistic pieces like what I often write here at Wrong Planet (just that journalism is a contracting business yet to be invented afresh!). Now, I do think anything artistic has luck factors and external factors and typically takes longer than a person might initially think. Of course, as soon as I say that, six months down the road you'll have something successfully published and selling and be thinking not so hard at all, don't know what this guy is talking about, and more power to you. I think you can probably do it with more of a light or medium touch if it's not something where you're heavily counting on a particular time frame.

So, I really encourage you to run multiple tracks, and I mean in kind of a casual and sloppy way (as far as time frame, but not necessarily quality of the work). Maybe look for okay and good jobs at the same time you pursue freelance writing and novellas.

Update: I was able to keep the job.

At this point, I'm seeing no relief from the odor problem, so I'm just going to try and tough it out, and wait for it to become a problem (i.e. management takes me aside). If that means I just have to not give a damn about strangers and what they're doing or saying, while I'm doing the right thing in working a regular job, then I guess that's the healthier route than putting my family through hell. My mind has often been inclined to concoct reasons not to live like a responsible adult. Seeking validation from medical professionals and such isn't a good way, since in the end all they ultimately care about after providing quality of service is getting the business.

So staying a little angry and not giving a damn whether they fire me is going to be how I play it. Another mantra I'm sticking to is I'm not there to make friends, because worrying about who doesn't like me adds to my stress ten-fold. I want to thank the people who replied.

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Last edited by SpiritBlooms on 09 Jul 2012, 6:58 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I admit to having not fully read all the replies, but I will chime in and say its very likely being caused by your diet. You might want to try what some refer to as a "detox" diet, temporarily and revert to a very natural, raw one. No hotdogs, sausages, red meat, chicken and fish is fine (I think, I know chicken is fine). Try to avoid a lot of sugars, this includes fruit. Some fruit is fine, of course, just don't over do it. Drink lots of water and if you don't already, try to start some kind of exercise plan. Walking or jogging is fine. This has helped people with body odor.

I would avoid grains and starches too (you will during detox). Dairy products are a no-no too.

Could very well be something going on with your colon or intestines, its why I mention going with foods that are more sensitive and natural on to them.

I saw a TV show about a woman who struggled with body oder for years until they found the cause.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trimethylaminuria

Bad and persistant body odor can be a sign of medical problems, so I find it hard to believe that your concern wouldn't be taken seriously by a doctor. Also, it would be something that they might bring up to you.

This caught my eye though:

If you've been diagnosed with schizophrenia, could the above experience be part of the disorder?
There's a really interesting series of articles about the experiences of people with different diagnoses: NY Times Lives Restored Series


In particular, I thought this bit was really interesting:


Full NY Times story