KT67 wrote:
... should not be feeling like I am feeling.
I understand how that expression is used and its meaning in that use.
In another sense the expression is illogical; the feeling you are having is a result of its causes, there is no other way for it to arise except to arise from its causes & given its causes, be they known or unknown, it indeed is the feeling which should result from those causes.
So, the adventure quest now becomes locating and identifying those causes.
_________________
"There are a thousand things that can happen when you go light a rocket engine, and only one of them is good."
Tom Mueller of SpaceX, in Air and Space, Jan. 2011