Please diagnose this disease????

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Joined: 14 Apr 2011
Age: 47
Gender: Female
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Location: Hindustan

17 Jan 2012, 5:01 am

I want to share some incidents I have witnessed in my life

1) I was sitting and reading loudly from my school Text book. My mom came running with red chilli powder in her hand and she was about to smear it in my eyes she was yelling and shouting loudly. I just covered my face with the book she was cussing me badly.
She thought i had said something bad about her actually i was just reading the text book.

2) Another time i was completing my maths homework. My father took out his slippers and started hitting me badly and my nose broke it started bleeding profusely. My father was eating some wafers and he thought that i had eaten the wafer so he hit me badly...whereas it was my brother who had eaten from the plate.

3) I came back from school. My brother started slapping me badly. He was yelling on top of his voice that why did i touch his cupboard. His clothes were overflowing and falling down so i was just arranging the cupboard.

4) My sister in law asked me why i used to bring food from hotels and eat daily. i was taken aback i told her that my mom used to give me very less to eat which was not sufficient since i used to work whole day and my mom used to just give me 2 pieces of bread at night....so i used to buy some more bread and bring for myself when i reached home. My mom was giving wrong impression about me to my sis in law.

5) The water tap was left on and water was flowing continously i switched off the tap yet again the tap was left open. I asked my mom why she was keeping tap open. She said that the walls are getting damp because of some seepage problems so she is emptying the entire buildings taps so that her walls dont become damp

6) My mom hurls abuses at my hubby. She says that im a cheat and tried to take over her property. I was living in her house and later when i moved out i gave it on rent. I informed her before giving on rent and also asked for her bank account so as to transfer the amount that i recieved from tenant. But instead she started hurling abuses to my husband about me.

7) i was 8 and half month pregnant my mom was calling me to another state for my brothers wedding. I told her i cant come because i was pregnant and it was my first time. She started cussing me, my brother started giving abusive words, they called up my in-laws and told all vile about me. i had to travel 18 hours by train for his wedding in 8 months of pregnancy and walk all the while during the wedding session.

Can you diagnose whats wrong with my mom, dad and brother or is it wrong with me????????

Last edited by namaste on 17 Jan 2012, 5:37 am, edited 1 time in total.

Phonic
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17 Jan 2012, 5:25 am

namaste wrote:

I want to share some incidents I have witnessed in my life some of them were done by me.

1) I was sitting and reading loudly from my school Text book. My mom came running with red chilli powder in her hand and she was about to smear it in my eyes she was yelling and shouting loudly. I just covered my face with the book she was cussing me badly.
She thought i had said something bad about her actually i was just reading the text book.

This suggests emotional erracticism and paranoia.

Quote:

2) Another time i was completing my maths homework. My father took out his slippers and started hitting me badly and my nose broke it started bleeding profusely. My father was eating some wafers and he thought that i had eaten the wafer so he hit me badly...whereas it was my brother who had eaten from the plate.

This is physical and emotional abuse and is probably not due to any disorder in particular, he was probably rasied badly and abused by his own parents - when you abuse your kid you tend to make that kid an abusive parent when they become parents themselves.

Quote:

3) I came back from school. My brother started slapping me badly. He was yelling on top of his voice that why did i touch his cupboard. His clothes were overflowing and falling down so i was just arranging the cupboard.

extreme territorialism and difficulty in mantaining his own emotions, but not suggestive of one particular disorder.

Quote:

4) My sister in law asked me why i used to bring food from hotels and eat daily. i was taken aback i told her that my mom used to give me very less to eat which was not sufficient since i used to work whole day and my mom used to just give me 2 pieces of bread at night....so i used to buy some more bread and bring for myself when i reached home. My mom was giving wrong impression about me to my sis in law.

Sounds like you came from a very abusive family, If I were you I'd check myself for disorders first, like PSTD.

Quote:

My mom hurls abuses at my hubby. She says that im a cheat and tried to take over her property. I was living in her house and later when i moved out i gave it on rent. I informed her before giving on rent and also asked for her bank account so as to transfer the amount that i recieved from tenant. But instead she started hurling abuses to my husband about me.

7) i was 8 and half month pregnant my mom was calling me to another state for my brothers wedding. I told her i cant come because i was pregnant and it was my first time. She started cussing me, my brother started giving abusive words, they called up my in-laws and told all vile about me. i had to travel 18 hours by train for his wedding in 8 months of pregnancy and walk all the while during the wedding session.

Can you diagnose whats wrong with my mom, dad and brother or is it wrong with me????????

have a look into "Borderline Personality Disorder" and "Antisocial Personality disorder".

What's important now is for you to just stay away from these abusive people till they get their heads on straight, and keep your kid away from them.

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namaste
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17 Jan 2012, 5:46 am

Phonic wrote:

namaste wrote:

[quote[

This is physical and emotional abuse and is probably not due to any disorder in particular, he was probably rasied badly and abused by his own parents - when you abuse your kid you tend to make that kid an abusive parent when they become parents themselves.

ya i was abused badly i used to abuse my son earlier but now i have completely stopped doing that infact i am a very loving and understanding parent. I changed so why didnt my parents changed eventually in some point in their life they could have realised that they were eccentric.

Quote:

Sounds like you came from a very abusive family, If I were you I'd check myself for disorders first, like PSTD.

I think i suffer from PTSD i have not taken treatment but i was into meditation, spirituality and also but main problem that i face is that
i dont understand social cues and often end up making social mistake, cant make long relationships, cant acquaint well with people, confused often cant take decisions properly.

Quote:

What's important now is for you to just stay away from these abusive people till they get their heads on straight, and keep your kid away from them.

I am staying away from them and also keeping my son away from them...but is it right that we avoid such people??? do such people need help and compassion???
I lam eft all alone after i cut off from them....because i cant build long lasting relationships.....im reclusive so i cant make friends....
They were only family available to me and cutting off from them as sorted many of my problems but yes during emergency i wont have anybody

The-Raven
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17 Jan 2012, 5:53 am

I would guess your mum has this
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paranoid_p ... y_disorder

and your dad was just colluding with her, lots of data suggests partners of paranoid/delusional people collude with them.

If so she wont change as she is too old and personality disorders only tend to get better with treatment when youngish, you are not like that as you dont have a personality disorder and just did things before as you did not know better because of how you were brought up, but changed when you realised it was wrong.

If i was you i would avoid your parents as much as possible.

namaste
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17 Jan 2012, 6:06 am

The-Raven wrote:

i read that link....many of things mentioned are there in her personality.
I agree that my mom was colluding with my father not directly but indirectly she was quite scared of him
since he was a alcoholic, abuser and used to beat her up extremely badly.

The fear in her mind for him made her become just like him.

Also you are right that i did not have personality disorder i just kept doing wrong things because of the home environment and i changed immediately when i realised those things were wrong.

I do avoid my parents but feel guilty of avoiding them.....i have a soft heart

Phonic
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17 Jan 2012, 6:08 am

Please do not feel guilty over avoiding your parents, in an emergency these are not the people you want to rely on.

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Rob-N4RPS
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17 Jan 2012, 6:35 am

Hello!

Funny, my reply to this post generated a site error...

YOU are NOT the problem. Your family is. You are the victim, not the villain. I, too, have been in situations where, like you, I wondered if *I* was the one with the problem.

I can see your point: What can you do when your whole family is an undiagnosed insane asylum? I am glad that you avoid them, lest you follow them down that same path.

To close, let me say that my heart goes out to you, your husband, and your child(ren). May you find the peace you seek.

Have A Great Day!

Rob

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namaste
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17 Jan 2012, 6:45 am

Phonic wrote:

Please do not feel guilty over avoiding your parents, in an emergency these are not the people you want to rely on.

i dont have anyone else or much of any other people around me to rely on during emergency.

namaste
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17 Jan 2012, 6:52 am

Rob-N4RPS wrote:

You got the right word I am not the villain but I am a victim.

And living with mentally insane people is quite scary :cry:

Recently there was a big fire in my mom's house, the entire house was charred there were black smoke residues left all over the wall. luckily the fire was extinguished in time as neighbours saw the fire.

jamieevren1210
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17 Jan 2012, 9:23 am

Delusional disorder?

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namaste
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17 Jan 2012, 9:54 am

do victims usually rebel back someday or they continue to act as if nothing happened?

Because for many years i was living with them and acting like nothing happened but there used to be daily beatings, cussing, mental torture. They never expected me to cut off from them they thought i will continue putting up with their @&**

169Kitty
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19 Jan 2012, 3:41 am

namaste wrote:

Yes it is right to keep your son away from them!! It's called good boundaries. If they can't act responsibly then they don't get the privilege of seeing you or your son.

Try to find a spiritual community near you. I go to a place where we study and honor all sacred pathways. These kind of places tend to be very accepting of any differences. The people in my spiritual community don't see me as defective and I've never felt judged or looked down on.

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19 Jan 2012, 4:29 am

169Kitty wrote:

namaste wrote:

i was earlier into spiritual paths i joined some groups but then the guru turned out to be a fraud it was telecasted live all over news channel i felt cheated.
i did join a healing circle but they used to demand money etc sometime for promotion work....over a time period i felt wrong signals from them so i quit.

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