Mimicking others...

Post Reply New Topic

"Can a f'd up life be celebrated?"

Nicola Tesla was in love with an imaginary, rainbow colored pidgin who had laser eyes.

Messed up is in the eyes of the beholder. Often, those eyes are others'. Sometimes, our own.

Me, I have a tendency to semi-voluntarily, semi-consciously imitate people. Basically, when I'm interacting, I'll often get the image of a person pop up in front of me and they will move and speak a certain way, and I will imitate both the way they move and speak without even thinking about it. I'll often have a positive, familiar sense as I do this.

Yes, I do this myself. Also, since no one actually knows me, they can't tell when I'm being me, or some other character, or recreating something that caused me trauma.
AspiePower has described my case too.

Wow I can relate to you 100%.

Growing up I would constantly mimic characters in movies or tv shows or books that I found cool or attractive in some way. To the point where I feel like I modeled my personality around them. (and similarly, it even extended to physical habits, such as how I stand/walk)

And similar to you I had a particular... affection for "f*****d up" lives or people. I modeled myself on self destructive people because I found a certain glamour in it all. In their struggles.

Here's a piece of advice though. I don't know how much you take it, I know I certainly wouldn't have back before I know what I now know, but honestly it leads to nothing good. When you reach your goal, ie have some kind of f****d up issues going on and self destructive behaviour to go with it, that's when you realise the true meaning of when they said their lives were a "struggle."

Honestly, it's a complete nightmare. Not only do you feel you've become this pathetic person who can't do things right, or achieve your dreams or idk whatever it is, but you live with the sickening knowledge that you put yourself there.

You didn't end up that way due to some kind of negative external factor, you made yourself unhappy. And then suddenly you've got no idea how to reverse it. And let me tell you, making yourself a happy and healthy person again is a heck of a lot harder than sliding into destruction.

I do honestly hope that some of this advice is helpful, but I have a feeling you might glamourize it or sth anyway lol

yehhh I used to do this alot* not so much anymore, but alot of my mannerisms were derived from others. For a period of a year in fact I became someone else. This was the first year of my A levels when I realised that suddenly all my peers had "grown up". I felt like a child among adults, so I watched the "Most mature" members of my peer group and sub/consciously imitated their mannerisms dress sense speech patterns etc. That was not* a good year for me and I subsequently failed most of my A levels after which my life really went down hill