Have you ever exaggerated or lied about having anxiety....

Post Reply New Topic

in order to escape situations that are complicated by your ASD or AS?

For instance, I can't handle driving directions for some reason.
So, I lie about having a phobia of or extreme anxiety with driving to get out of it. It's embarrassing and weird, but less weird than explaining why you can't get somewhere that you have been a hundred times when you are a perfectly intelligent individual. Also, people seem to understand phobias and anxiety whereas a lot of people have no clue what ASD is. And, with a phobia, people assume you are relatively normal outside of the trigger situation. If you disclose your ASD/Asperger's, people will always look at you funny and wonder if your behavior (any behavior) is ASD related.

Plus, I started exaggerating my anxiety before I even realized that I probably had Asperger's or even what Asperger's was. I just felt like a freak. I am up for evaluation soon. If I get a confirmed diagnosis, I may have to confess to the Dr. that I see for bipolar/anxiety/panic that I might not even have anxiety or panic.

Do you get overwhelmed by driving directions, or no sense of direction?

No, I haven't, but that might actually work in some situations. That's a good tip!

Only problem I see is that they might expect you to go to therapy and be cured of the phobia, or get meds for the anxiety

I sometimes pretend to be "totally overwhelmed" when I'm not. Mainly because people like to push me and no one really acts appropriately when I actually am overwhelmed. They either do nothing or do everything they shouldn't do. They do stupid stuff like constantly talk to me, ask me questions that make me anxious and tell me to calm down. I hate when people do that stuff so it's better if I can leave the situation before I get to that point.

Nope. Never lied or exaggerated about it. Unfortunately my anxiety is quite real.

Devil Kisses, I can relate to that. It's like there is no doubt the storm is coming, it's just a matter of whether you are going to take shelter before it gets there or wait it out to the last possible moment.

Androbot01, I hope you don't feel offended. I do have an abnormal level of anxiety, it's just that I may not have enough to have a dx. And now I am kind of self-conscious about trying to explain how things that were previously thought of as my anxiety probably had to do more with AS.

I think it's probably not that uncommon to feel anxiety at your executive functioning begins to shut down. I know that has happened to me.

No, I am rather prone to belittle my issues than exaggerate them. When I am overwhelmed by something I rather say that I simply don't like it instead of saying it scares the hell out of me. I can't just play a victim because I have ASD or whatever. I often end up in a situation that gets me into meltdown or shutdown but before it happens I am thinking everything is fine and I can deal with it somehow. Until I reach my limit, the point without going back I overdo myself because I am convinced I am stronger then I really am and I can deal with the situation somehow. And surprisingly most of the time it actually works. I stand the situation till it is over(unless I break down at a point ) and then there is no longer need for escaping because the danger is no longer valid.

And about hard, confusing situations: I just say what my problem is. I tend to get into a long, detailed arguments about it. For example I avoid public transportation and I rarely use it since I find it confusing so when someone tells me to use it the conversation gets like this:
- You just go there.
- Yeah, but how do I get there?
- You take a bus.
- Which bus? What ticket should I buy? Where does the bus stop? At which bus stop should I leave?
- You take bus this and this, buy simple ticket, get out near this and this.
- What kind of ticket is simple ticket?
- Just any ticket.
- Is any ticket OK? When I was a kid I got wrong ticket and I had to pay 80PLN punishment.
- Then buy a ticket at the driver and tell him where you go. He will give you the right one.
- How do I ask him for one?
- You say "I want to buy a ticket to xyz".
- Don't I have to say the price of ticket? They are sold by price, not destination.
- The driver will know which ticket you need since it is his job.
- Ok. But how do I recognize which bus stop should I leave? What if I miss it?
- You might ask someone to tell you.
- How do I ask a stranger to tell me?
- You just ask.
- How? What do I say?
- You say something like "Can you tell me when we get near xyz please?"
- That sound weird. Shouldn't I say why I want him to tell me? It doesn't implicate I need to get out there and thats why it is important.
- Gosh, you are a pain. Just say "Can you tell me when we get near xyz please? Because I need to get out there and I don't know this route." then.
- What if the stranger doesn't know either?
- You ask someone else.
- But I should end the conversation somehow.
- Just say "thank you".
- But I will have nothing to thank for because the stranger will do nothing for me if he doesn't know.
- Man, whats wrong with you? Stop asking such stupid questions! Thats just common sense you thank in situations like this.
- It makes no sense.
- Stop looking for problems when there is none. You make it too complicated.
- So you see what I mean. It is too complicated.
- No, its not! It's easy, just just make it hard.
- Never mind, I just got an idea what I am going to do. I will just google map the bus route, find all bus stops near the place and remember them. Then get out on 1st one in the area and walk to the destination point. Even the ticket prices are listed by areas.
- Isn't it easier to simply ask someone in the bus?
- No, its not.
- You can't possibly remember the whole area map!
- Yes, I can. Don't worry about that. It's easy.
- It's not, you will get lost.
- I will not. I am going to have the map in my head.

I honestly piss people off when I get into conversations like this.