my speech is impaired-I am not stupid

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Hi. I have suffered through life with depression, anxiety, and social phobia. My ability to articulate has always been difficult and is just getting worse. The inabilities to articulate does not reflect a person's smartness, ability to reason. People have always treated me like I'm stupid, "dumb". And that look they give me!! ! like I'm insane!! !

I know in my head what I want to say, it just comes out all stumbled and I also loose my train of thought when I speak and because I have social phobia I feel under pressure to speak correctly in a timely, which, of course impedes my thinking and speaking.

I feel trapped inside my body! I want to break free and be myself again. I just don't know how else to explain what I'm feeling and going through. it's just hell and i can't escape.

btw, I've seen specialized physicans and they can't find anything with me, so I'm alone in this agony.

I can't reach out to anyone, including family members, they just find me annoying and don't want me around or hear about my issues. I'm glad I have a place here to vent.

Are you taking any meds? You mention it getting worse & some meds can sometimes make it harder to speak.

People don't understand things they have no experience with; that's the way it's always been.

Perhaps not a great solution, but have you tried just writing notes to people instead of talking? That will indicate that you have a problem with speaking rather than a cognitive problem. Some people may assume that you are mute, so that's another misconception that you may have to deal with if you decide to try my suggestion.

I hear ya. I have schizophrenia, which causes a psychotic speech disorder. Conversing, or rather, being *expected* to converse is a major pain.