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Do I have schizotypal disorder or schizophrenia?
Definately yes 7%  7%  [ 2 ]
Rather yes 50%  50%  [ 15 ]
Rather no 23%  23%  [ 7 ]
Defnately no 20%  20%  [ 6 ]
Total votes : 30

nca14
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06 Dec 2014, 3:36 am

I wonder if I have schizotypal disorder (F21 in ICD-10) or even schizophrenia (F20). Some of my "symptoms":

- I had magical compulsions (often with arithmomania) which started in early childood and were quite severe when I was about 12 - 15 years old (it might be magical (schizotypal) OCD without insight); it may be similar to ideas of influence.
- I also had weird, somewhat absorbing fantasies (such as about special powers, "grandiosity" and something omnipotence-like) such as fantasies about being fully black, headless, very powerful being composed from spiky triangled named Megamon; I even prayed to become Megamon, maybe with arithmomania (such as conting to 64 (2*2*2*2*2*2)); I remember that I had temptation that I am the Creator when I was 17 and I might believe in it for some seconds.
- I feared spce aliens when I was about 6 - 9 years old. I am interested in paranormal phenomena since (early) childhood.
- Sporadically I had (para)hallucinations when I was about 17 years old (usually auditory).
- I had marked suspiciousness since I was about 16 years old ("obsessive" fear that people who are not from my family want to poison, kill, harm me); I have the closest relation in my grandmother in my opinion, rather not with people wo are not so "close" to me.
- I had also "derealisation-like" ideas since about 16 years old, maybe I had also some depersonalisation (but maybe rather later). I may have also other bizarre "delusional" ideas.
- I had blatantly bizarre ideas (such as peculiar shame of having head or some other parts of the body), I might "not want to believe" that I have face, need micronutries for health; I even said that I "do not have head" because it was something "ugly" - I like spiky triangles, but round shapes might appear to my mentality as "ugly".
- I liked to fantasy that I am a female (it was associated with bizarre sexual perversions in my opinon), maybe wit some sort of imagining that I am a female, I might even have something like pleasure from imagining to be a female. It is bizarre, but it may be associated (also) wth some sort of peculiar developmental paraphilia
- I do not think that they are schizophrenia spectrum traits, but I had strange "psychopathic" or "sadistic" tendencies in childood; also tendency to "stupid" behavor, to make "clown" of myself; I have rather "idiosyncratic" sense of humour
- Now I really "like" neologisms, metaphorical and stereotyped thinking (but I think that there may be a talent in it, not schizophrenia spectrum disorder symptom); now I may have many ideas of reference (but I think that they may be signs from spiritual beings, not symptoms of F21 or F20 or other mental disorders).
- I do not think about the job; my fears are rather "physical" (such as fear of pain) or "existential" (such as fear of being damned (eschatological)); I may "firstly philosophize, then live", not "firstly live, then philosophize"; im my mentality there may be strong division to "mine" and "not mine" (for example, people with conditions similar to mine may be "mine", but "NTs" may be "not mine")

Maybe I have McDD? I have Asperger syndrome diagnosis since more than 6 years. I have marked dyssemia, "idiosyncratic mode" of social interactions and "obsessive" interests. I suppose that I have also ADHD and SCT, mild NLD. I was told that I had "bookish case of OCD" when I was 17. I get paroxetine to relieve OCD and "obsessiveness".



nca14
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07 Dec 2014, 7:45 am

I think that I am "kooky". My thinking is so weird and idiosyncratic.



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11 Dec 2014, 4:17 am

Symptoms of what I described in first topic? On Polish AS forum I got 5 votes, all "rather yes" or "definately yes". Someone even do not see ASD in me, but something from psychotic spectrum.

Do I have for example only NLD and anxiety? I may have it, but they do not make me so "nerdy", "kooky" and "twitty". I would name my disorder as a schizoautistic, dysexecutive PDD. Name without "wrapping in cotton" (Polish: owijanie w bawełnę). I have idiosyncratic mentality, it is my problem. Not learning disorder.



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11 Dec 2014, 5:44 am

I do not have so much "unusual sensory experiences". I suppose that in America I would be diagnosed rather with NLD, not schizotypal diosrder or AS(D).

But I have magical, grandiose, derealisational, suspicious and blatantly bizarre thinking. It is kooky itself. Not "NLDish". I rather surely did not confused fiction and reality as a child. I have not anedonia, rather even something opposite :)

Some examples of my "delusional ideas" from my life:

Magical or reference - for exmple thinking that if I do not do something (for example do not step at the pile) something wrong will happen (for example somebody will go to Hell)

Grandiose - suc as thinking that I am the Creator etc.

Derealisational - thinking that other people do not exist in fact, doubts about it

Suspicious - thinking that people outside my family want to kill, harm, poison me.

Bizarre - for example not wanting to believe that Aspies defecate, earlier I do not ant to believe that I have head, face etc. because it was "shameful"; "imagining" to be a female who is sexually attrctive earlier

I do not feel tht anyone observes me. I had fear of space aliens as a child. It looks for me nutty.



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11 Dec 2014, 4:45 pm

We cannot diagnose you here. Please see a mental health professional.


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11 Dec 2014, 5:44 pm

You sound pretty schizotypal.

I was also a bit like this when I was younger but I was not paranoid, my thoughts were not so bizarre and my experiences and beliefs were different than yours(but still delusional and unusual). I am diagnosed with just AS and the schizotypal traits are long gone, I apparently simply grown up of them. Kids are kids.

I still have some unusual views on life (compared to community I live in - but not unusual when you face them logically) but I don't regret the years when I was delusional (13-18). It was actually keeping me sane no matter how weird it might sound now. Some people just need to believe they are special. It's a decent way to gain a nice amount self-esteem when you don't fit into society expectations. I wouldn't be myself now if I didn't believe I was a incarnated demon or an alien-hybrid when I was a teenager. In fact I would be dead by now if I didn't. The beliefs saved me from suicide - they were explaining my issues and giving me a reason to live as well as the ability to stand for myself so bullies couldn't hurt me anymore.

The question is how much it interferes with your life in a negative way. Since there is nothing wrong in thinking you are Creator, believing in supernatural and having derealization episodes as long as it gives no negative impact to you or your surrounding.
You sound worse than I was though.



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12 Dec 2014, 6:04 am

My thoughts were kooky for me. I consider myself a "kook" and "crackpot". I do not want them, but I have problem with severely idiosyncratic mentality. When I asked my psychiatrist about schizotypal disorder in October 2014, I heard something like that: "next diagnosis is not needed for you" (Polish: "kolejna diagnoza jest ci niepotrzebna"). Psychiatrist may think that it is just a symptom of AS or OCD. I had also bizarre sexuality since childhood. My family may look at me as someone who is gifted. I have appreciable talent to getting good grades in schools, but I do not see so much "marketable skills" in me.

I read much about a person from Poland who wrote much on this forum (nearly 4000 posts), who had marked traits of gifted child in childhood, was excellent speller and learned how to read really early, but now is unempoyed (is 30 years old) and lives with mother who markedly ignored her AS symptoms and comorbidities (which caused dysexecutiveness). I do not want to end like her, but I am quite similar to her. My mother appears to ignore my problems. My family is a bit pathological. I suppose genetic origin of many of my problems. I do not know what will be with my job. I think that I have (even not so mild) SCT/CDD (sluggish cognitive tempo/concentration deficit disorder). It is almost unknown in Poland. I have not so strong visual thinking. I do not like complex tasks, such as writing essays, making projects on studies. I had severe scrupulosity. I may never be able to marriage due to my disorders and immaturity. I want to live in wifelessness all my life, but I do not want to live lonely. I sometimes may feel as someone with intellectual disability. Sometimes have dreams about having the Aspijka who is markedly similar to me as my only one wife.



Paukipaul
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12 Dec 2014, 6:29 am

I have several schizos in the family.

I live in germany. I heavely advise you to seek treatment. Experience in my family show that, if untreated, you'll have problems in the future.

Expierience also show, that medical treatment is very helpful.



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12 Dec 2014, 7:39 am

My bizarre ideas are not helping me. I had a lot of magical, schizotypal obsessions and compulsions before being 16 years old. They did not helped me... I might even not think about their "reality". From being about 16 years old suspiciousness and derelaisational ideas began. Now I may have all sorts of bizarre ideas (magical/influential, grandiose, suspicious, derealizational/depersonalisational(?), other bizarrities)... And I have a lot of stereotypical, metaphorical, weird, repetitive thinking, maybe also speech. Sometimes I might feel mild "odors" (rather pleasant, weak olfactory parahallucination?). I can have ruminations about sexuality, aggression, "dysmorphophobia-like". I rather do not have closer social relations outside my family. Criteria of schizotypal disorder in ICD-10 are concerningly similar to my "symptoms" in my opinion.

But my weirdness did not start in adolescence. I was at the psychologist or psychiatrist when I was about 6 years old. They wrote that I had "emotional disorders". I was sometimes noticed as "hyperactive (psychomotorically)". I rather did not think about looking at the face when I was younger. I had stupid psychopathic inclinations (such as temptations to cause very tragic road accident for "nutty" fun and "joke" and fame of my loving place in country, not to cause someone's pain or take revenge).

When I read about cases of AS from Poland, some were "strangely" similar to mine in many aspects. They have more cognitive or neurological, environmental problems, but they were not so idiosyncratic and were not "nutty". I think that I fit to Aspies well. But now I am not a high-functioning person. I do not have classical form of AS, mine may be not related to Kanner's autism at all. I do not have so sensitive hear, can work when I listen music or TV (it may even motivate me). I have rather appreciable amount of NT traits.



Paukipaul
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12 Dec 2014, 8:39 am

If you want help, seek help. IF you are schizo, then you have a high chance of it to show itself to a harmful degree when you are in your late twenties.



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12 Dec 2014, 12:07 pm

I do not know what it is exactly. I might suppose that I have in fact just NLD with anxiety... But I would rather name it schizoautistic PDD. There is large weirdness in my case, not learning problem. It may be described by comorbidity of Asperger's and schizotypal disorder. Many of my OCD symptoms fits also to F21. I appear to have some dysexecutive problems also, such as SCT and maybe ADHD. I can control my bizarre thoughts quite well. I may have NLD profile, but the way in which the term NLD is used is really wrong in my opinion and the name is used in misleading way.



Paukipaul
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13 Dec 2014, 9:53 am

Any which way, seek help if you need to.



nca14
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20 Dec 2014, 6:42 am

Someone votes that I definately not have F20 or F21... It is interesting why.



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24 Dec 2014, 4:36 am

Hello. I am diagnosed aspergers/schizoaffective and have talked to several people with similar diagnoses. Some of the symptoms can overlap so it is important to notice what symptoms you are having that cannot be better explained by autism. The most obvious one is unusual perceptions such as hallucinations, which you said you don't experience, however some of your thought process seems atypical of autistic symptoms. I would guess it is unlikely you have full blown schizophrenia, but schizotypal may be possible. You may just have to find a better doctor to evaluate you because symptoms overlap and psych labels are simply terms used to describe a set of traits someone has. Everyones traits are different and will not fix perfectly into a predefined condition because each person has their own unique condition. Feel free to ask me any questions you may have.



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24 Dec 2014, 8:02 am

I have a lot of idiosyncratic thinking. People with full-blown schizophrenia "appear" as less idiosyncratic than me for me. Schizophrenia rather starts after childhood, I was "weird" even in childhood. Something which might be (para)hallucinations occurred only sporadically in my case. I had quite large number of whacky delusional ideas, but I do not believe in them. I might name it as "schizotypal-obsessive-compulsive cluster". I might think that I have just "nonverbal learning disability with anxiety", but that idea is dumb for me. I am too idiosyncratic, atypical and "original" to be described as a person who has just "nonverbal learning disability with anxiety". I am "nutty".