Any other autistic spectrum folks with This dilemma

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Hi i am new here. I have a miserable family life and live in the country where it's rural and folks are non friendly. I am wondering if there are any people with alcoholic family member or other dsyfunction. I have low iq but i am on the autism spectrum and this is killing me. Don't get me wrong i am not suicidal but have not been in clubs or activities or anything for the longest time. I have met folks around and have had a few bf's here and there. When i meet people i almost always meet Criminals ( I am SERIOUS) alcoholics OR just BAD people. I get attention online i guess becasue people aren't afraid to message me. the Saying goes you attract what you are. I don't believe it and My MOM is constantly blaming me. I hate the store where i work at and she Expects me to find A roommate there. That is totally not probable in my situation since i don't talk to folks Unless they talk to me. Guess who i met at this DAM store: a nasty Dirty pervert old man who Harrassed me for months because i didn't stand up for myself. I have been talked down to at every single job and have not Worked FT yet unfortunately. I also have AVPD definitely from all the years of emotional abuse. I am wondering does the Alcoholism/family dsyfunction make the autism/disability worse? My mom HAS threatened to 302 me for BS that is not serious. She constantly says my sister moved out because of me which i don't believe. These autism "Services" are a joke and I want rid of them. Anybody Out there that Can Tell me Something Good? ANYONE here have any advice for me or anyone who Can relate i would Appreciate some Response. ( SERIOUS INQUIRIES PLEASE) Thanks all

Welcome to Wrong Planet.

I do not know what to say. It is horrible when parents have alcohol issues. I am fortunate that though my Dad could have easily become one, my Mum handled the money (In Wales it is the woman and my Dad did not have a clue with money!) My Mum kept alcohol for special occasions, which was good.
Some peoples character tends to have them become easily addicted to things. I generally stay away from alcohol just incase, other then a single glass of wine on a rare occasion.

Some areas people tend to copy each other so if you happen to live in an area where people often get drunk, it can be difficult.

I don't have answers. Hopefully others will have some advice.

I am sorry your situation is awful. Family dysfunction makes any way of being worse, including ASD. Something good: Life can get better. You very clearly articulated your dilemma; you have many folks here with similar struggles currently and many in the past (past, because life got better).

I am of ASD type that has few emotional boundaries --- this both caused and/or was caused by my mom who gaslighted me (blamed me for things WAY outside my control). I am easily gaslighted to this day --- and take fault for others people's transgressions. Based on your writing I'd say perhaps you see this a bit more clearly with your mom. Establishing a mental shield is important. I'm in my late 40s and now able to do this (more).

Predators seem to have radar for the vulnerable, which ASD can be. I am not vulnerable for physical abuse, but I am vulnerable for emotional abuse. I'm an easy "mark" somehow. When given time I can figure out situations, but in the moment I don't process what's going on (so don't react, or I react badly) - and some folks take advantage of that.

All that said, it's getting better for me. I am practicing taking my time, coming back to things, standing up for myself (albeit after the initial fact). I am in an awful work environment and am shoring up my resources so I can get out. In this age of the pandemic a lot of resources are now available nationwide (e.g. AANE support groups recommended to me here) --- so perhaps you could get (productive) resources from outside your (unsupportive) community that way...

Hang in there, keep taking those steps that are within your control, in the direction you want, and you'll get there!

Try to get services for intellectual disability if the autism services are not working out. Tell them you have an abusive/stressful home environment and they may be able to support you moving out.

Try to get disability income so that you can afford your own apartment.