Say Something Random: psychological Conditions Version

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I wonder if a traumatic experience at a very young age can make you have delusions of grandeur

Well I have delusions of grandeur (I obviously keep it under control) and I think it's down to childhood trauma.

I'm gonna speak to my shrink about this next week

I'm able to sustain mindfulness for... About an entire day. Yes, even for something like watching TV.

Downside is that it will give me a day long headache the day after. The headache is radiating dead center in my head.

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I struggle with mindfulness

I'm wondering if mindfulness can be helpful for people with adhd.

Been dealing over the years with things associiated with the last few posts..And have had to have extended experiences with nutrition and supplements geared toward primarily brain function. Primarily due to some very serious health "setbacks" to put it much more mildly than , it deserves, but With directed sttention to soecific supplements and nutriets
And given the dituation , have on the average done far better than any doctor could have anticipated . but a high price was paid. Healthwise the the experience could not be replicated. But the psyche stuff about mindfulness was a helpful thing , but nothing compared to targeted supplementation.. Just my experience. And many yearsof therapy of msny sorts .

I now meditate to give myself a sensory rest, make myself fall asleep in some way, or as an emergency sleep alternative if my sleep schedule clashes with an appointment.

I think it went better in the BCPs I'm taking now that I don't feel that painful stupid inertia crap whenever I end up falling asleep.

Else, at one point, when I was a newbie at it, I got so lucky at meditating that it rose my consciousness and had the weirdest week of my life so far that changed the way I see things.

But eh...
Yeah I know I'm 'not my thoughts', that I'm 'not my feelings', etc.
That still did not made me just get over all the unwanted subconscious shite and it somehow pisses me off that it cannot be directly influenced and just damn change the way I want to go about with this life, damnit.

And it's always indirect and had to be consistent; and the only widely available route is a literal pain trial and error that had to be with the right people, with the right place, with the right time -- therapy is supposed to do that but I cannot afford that.

The rise of awareness did not made me 'love humanity', their life and existence; it made me too forgiving to a point that I hate being one even more of it because of how much of a pain it is, and yeah, I can 'see' how easy it is but damnit I also understand the so called excuses more than people who just say 'just do it'.

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15mg so far so good

Thanks man