Bisexual ladies <3

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Lay-deez! okay, jokes aside.

I'm bisexual and I have been for a couple years now, but I've never really had a girlfriend. My best friend and I basically came out together, and we've had a pretty close relationship ever since, but not actually dating.

Right now I have a boyfriend, but I've been leaning more and more toward liking girls ever since I came out. Here is my confusion: physically, I like girls a lot. Personality-wise, I don't really have any clue because I haven't ever been around any lesbians or been that close to any girls to know what they're like - the ones who aren't preppy and self-centered and extraordinarily mainstream, that is. And relationship-wise, I'm like a dog with catnip. I have no idea what a relationship with a girl would be like.

One of the reasons I like men is because of the comforting feeling I get from them. I think with women this might not be so readily present, and especially because of the fact that I tend to have a motherly or caring instinct, I might end up being the one who provides the comforting feeling without realizing it. I'm a little afraid of that because I think it would mean I'd end up on the giving end and I wouldn't get any comfort in return. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I like girls but if I were to try a relationship with one, I wouldn't want to be the 'masculine' one in the relationship.

There are lesbian relationships where both girls are the 'feminine' component, right? There doesn't have to be one 'masculine' and one 'feminine' partner? I know this is a concept but I want to hear from people who actually have or had a relationship like that.

[... I suppose I'm wondering, just a little, if there's any girl out there around my age who would be my first girlfriend and sort of debrief me. (for lack of a better word) but at the same time, as I said, I have a boyfriend right now and I love him, and I don't want to leave him anytime soon. I'm terrible that way; wanting to have my cake and eat it too... ]

Hi. I'm too old for you (25 as you can see) and I'm bisexual but never been with a girl. But I'm fairly certain that there can be any combination of femininity and/or masculinity in any relationship.

I myself would prefer relationships that are "equal", ones where both parties are both masculine and feminine though maybe in different ways with a net effect of neither being "the man" or "the woman" if you know what I mean.

Just my idle thoughts on the matter!

well, as a tomboyish lesbian. I probably don't qualify to answer the question. But seriously, as long as it feels right to you, why would it matter? Being an Amazing mess is awesome, btw

I can relate. I've never really had a gf, and I'm with a man at the moment. I'm a bit frustrated. My bf said he wouldn't mind if I saw another woman, but I don't know how he would really react.

I've been on dates with girls and had one night stands with them, but that was a few years ago. They were drunken, desperate affairs. I don't have any real relationship experience with women. I don't know what'll happen to me in the future. I guess I'll just love whoever I love. Que sera, sera and all that.

I find my 'natural' approach to relationships is not to think too much about gender.

thanks (:
I don't see why being tomboyish would disqualify you. I'm a little tomboyish myself, although I'm keeping my hair long right now for my boyfriend ( ), and I personally think tomboys are extra cute.

purchase - thanks, that makes sense. equality is good. (:

puddingmouse - (I love your name by the way ) I would probably try taking a 'natural' approach like that too, although I don't have enough experience. basically I'm only used to dating guys so if I were to think about dating a girl, it's not on equal ground with me yet.

My friends sometime think that i shouldn't be count as a girl. lol. I think I am a girl, just a tomboyish one, but i just don't want others to feel cheated you know. I am happy to debrief you with whatever. It's just that I don't really have a lot of experiences. Inbox me if you want to.