Page 1 of 1 [ 10 posts ] 

AlwaysKeepingTime
Butterfly
Butterfly

User avatar

Joined: 5 Sep 2013
Age: 23
Gender: Female
Posts: 13
Location: California

01 Feb 2014, 11:50 pm

I think that I might be lesbian, I say "I think I might" because I have never been in any kind of romantic relationship before. I've never even kissed anyone, so how can I know for sure? I know that I have a crush on a female friend(I told her about my crush, she didn't freak out but she is straight so we're still just friends), I know that lately the idea of being with a guy just isn't appealing to me, and I know that the idea of being with a girl does appeal to me.

When I told all of this to my Mom a few days ago she told me she suspected this for a while now, as I've always dressed and acted androgynous. She didn't seem to mind, so I thought everything was great.

Then I realized that I live in a rural, mostly Conservative/Christian community, and it hit me how this is probably one of the worst places I could be while figuring this out. I already felt completely alone and terrible before all this, now I feel even worse because I know I'll probably never find anyone around here, and if I do we'd have to deal with the local ignorant rednecks.

Lately I've been staying in bed all day, surfing the web and feeling sad. I know this won't help but I don't know what my next step should be...


_________________
A.K.T.


fossil_n
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 3 May 2012
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 159

04 Feb 2014, 10:19 pm

I'm glad everything is good with your mom.

Your profile says you are 17? If you are planning on going to college, all but the most conservative schools should have an LGBTQ group (if you are looking at colleges now, you might look the schools' LGBTQ group online). Otherwise, if you aren't going to college, you might consider moving to a larger town after you graduate.

In the meantime, you can look up websites for LGBTQ youth that have message boards. Also, I wouldn't completely despair about finding someone in your community. This past summer I worked at girl scout camp in a rural/conservative/christian region, and I think maybe 1/3 of the staff (who were mostly 17-22 years old) were queer.



AlwaysKeepingTime
Butterfly
Butterfly

User avatar

Joined: 5 Sep 2013
Age: 23
Gender: Female
Posts: 13
Location: California

07 Feb 2014, 6:43 pm

Thanks for telling me this, it's good to know that I'm not as alone in all this as I thought I was.

I don't think that I'll be going to collage, but eventually I'll start volunteer work at the library, maybe I'll find somebody there?


_________________
A.K.T.


starkid
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 9 Feb 2012
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,489
Location: California Bay Area

08 Feb 2014, 5:31 pm

AlwaysKeepingTime wrote:
I think that I might be lesbian


Well, if you are, welcome to the club. :wtg:



goldfish21
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Feb 2013
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 12,292
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada

09 Feb 2014, 8:59 pm

Live life. work hard. Save money. Plan on moving to a big city. Problem solved.


_________________
No :heart: for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.


DoubleCatrin
Toucan
Toucan

User avatar

Joined: 24 Feb 2013
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Posts: 255
Location: Denmark

12 Feb 2014, 10:21 am

Hei there, I know a bit what you're going through ...
it's nice that your mom agrees to it...
I think Fossil gave some good advice...
Don't expect to find anyone very soon and I suggest you be careful since you say you're in a more conservative area, not all the people around you might have the same attitude as your mother
I have the same issue too 8O

maybe we'll both find eventually the truth :D



coffeebean
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Oct 2013
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 769
Location: MN, US

12 Feb 2014, 11:17 am

AlwaysKeepingTime wrote:
Thanks for telling me this, it's good to know that I'm not as alone in all this as I thought I was.

I don't think that I'll be going to collage, but eventually I'll start volunteer work at the library, maybe I'll find somebody there?


A library will have a lot of people, so it's a good place to make new friends. I don't know how easy it will be to connect with another woman who likes women, though, since no one's exactly going to wear it on their sleeves in a very conservative town.

As you get older you'll have more money and mobility, making it easier to travel out of town to more open-minded places. You might even find it's a good idea to move. It's not much, but it's a hope.



sleepingfish
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

User avatar

Joined: 20 Feb 2014
Age: 37
Gender: Female
Posts: 22
Location: New England - USA

22 Feb 2014, 5:59 pm

I realized I am a lesbian seventeen months ago. You most certainly are not alone!
I recommend that you and your mother look up GirlfriendsTV on youtube. Arielle Scarcella is a very open lesbian who runs the channel and is available to answer questions and provide support. It is a safe community for LGBT people who have not found a community yet and full of very factual videos discussing all sorts of issues. There is nothing inappropriate about it though I haven't seen anything mentioned about Autism and Homosexuality yet. I hope this helps you!



TrippyPhysics
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 10 Mar 2014
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 67

11 Mar 2014, 7:12 am

ive been gay since i was 5 (lesbian) go for it, be happy in life trust me because my family are full of heavy catholics but doesnt mean im gonna stop myself from being myself, cheers and hope everythin gets better for u!



mizplazed
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

User avatar

Joined: 17 Oct 2006
Age: 54
Gender: Female
Posts: 21
Location: boston

18 Mar 2014, 1:50 pm

I live and went to a small liberal arts college in the obsessively liberal East Coast surrounded by millions.

My GF went to college in a Mormon-ville state school in the middle of nowhere.

Guess which place had more LGBT social events/bars, etc.?

Be smart and be safe in whatever choices you make. You a have a lifetime ahead of you. And, odds are you will be friends with at least 2 of your exes in 30 years so choose wisely. :wink: