The Wrong Planet Limerick Thread!

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its dulcet not ducet
don't try to duck it
you having a laugh?
he's having a laugh!
or am i extra-emly moronic

My scansion is perfect I trow.
My rhyming is just "In the know".
My poesy's fine
I craft ev'ry line.
My spelling? - now that I can blow.

There once was a boy in my class
with testicles made out of brass.
In dark stormy weather
they'd bang together
and sparks would shoot out of his ass!

That boy with the balls bright brazen,
When he swallowed chocolate raisin
Upped his voltage to double
And he blew out a bubble
That fizzed and sparked quite amazen'

Have you heard of the girl with glass tits
So you could see all the small inside bits.
If you tickled her nipples
Stuff inside would make ripples
That would give her audience fits.

There's that fellow quite quick in love
Since he wore a thick woolen glove
That maintained his heat
'Til he was complete
Which worked, when push comes to shove.

I've been told of an amorous mouse
Who loved to drink and carouse
With his most eager wives
Who led fun filled lives
And made babies that filled the whole house.

It's said that love makes one blind.
But it just takes one bump and grind
To stimulate vision
With one provision:
There must be a nice round behind.

Haha! You should make that a rap song.

A girl with very nice eyes
Was, at end, very wise.
"It's not my great face",
She said,"in the race
Where sex can be a surprise".

Men who can't be alone,
It's clear, can be shown
Possess a good system
So girls can't resist 'em
With tons of testosterone.

My mind, girls complain, never makes it.
It's something else that takes it.
Whatever it is,
Makes men's eyes fizz
Whenever I shows it and shakes it.

People who are overweight
Complain about their extra freight.
"When I try to read scales,"
They say with loud wails,
"My belly frustrates looking straight."

A fellow who worked at the zoo
Remarked, "It's a nice job to do
With tiger and pheasant
The time spent is pleasant
If you don't mind stepping in poo."

Appreciation threads are very well said
It makes their particular subjects well fed
Although some of them go down in pieces
Because they were rejected from Reese's
Some of them continue to be well led.