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AudaciousLarue
Blue Jay
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28 May 2012, 7:42 pm

Is this good character development as an opening to a story I've been working on?


“Destruction was like freedom to us. Once we felt its seductive charm, Hell itself couldn't keep us from doing what we did to forever hold onto its grasp.“ I peered defiantly out towards the front of the court room at a jury of my peers. As a result of living in a small town since childhood, I must have been able to tell who each and every juror was.
The prosecutor gave me a disgusted look, frown and all. He really was an uncaring bastard. “Mr.-” A nervous laugh escaped my mouth. I knew right then that he was from out of town. I let him suffer for it.
“Mr. Shcharansky, your little stunt ended lives. Families are grieving. You're-” I laughed once more. What he was about to call me, a criminal, was far from the truth. Of course, most out-of-townees like him didn't give two shits about what the difference between a nice guy and a bad guy was. I was a nice guy. I saved many lives by ending just a few lives on accident.
“Screw you, grandpa! My actions saved those kids' and their parents' lives, and you act if I'm the bad guy here.”
“Well-” I had him feeling in the dark for a firm reply. I smiled. Not only did I make him out to be the bastard that he was, but I made him out to be a no-good liar as well.
“Those criminals would've killed everybody if it wasn't for what me and the gang did. The needs of the many outweigh that of the few.”



edgewaters
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28 May 2012, 8:58 pm

It's good characterization, or depiction of characters, I'd say, but it's much too short to be character development. Character development usually refers to a longer process where the character is involved in various situations and somehow changes as a result. Basically it has to do with making characters dynamic and ever-changing.

A really great example of character development is the television series Breaking Bad. Every one of the main characters is constantly undergoing profound changes, except for one (which appears to be deliberate in that case).



redrobin62
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28 May 2012, 10:08 pm

What Edgewater wrote is correct. Also, in screenplays and movies, there's a specific form of character development called an arc. The difference here is the answer to these question: what must my character do to win a conflict? What weakness must he overcome to be the victor?

Another thing. You HAVE to learn writing format. Try to place speech on their own lines. Also, children say they do things "on accident." It's "by accident."