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When's the last time you had the courage to ask anyone out?

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When's the last time you had the courage to ask anyone out?
Within the past couple months 31%  31%  [ 27 ]
Within the past year 10%  10%  [ 9 ]
Last year 7%  7%  [ 6 ]
Two years ago 7%  7%  [ 6 ]
Three years ago 3%  3%  [ 3 ]
Four years ago 1%  1%  [ 1 ]
Five years ago 9%  9%  [ 8 ]
Never 32%  32%  [ 28 ]
Total votes : 88

LePetitPrince
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03 Jul 2009, 9:24 am

MissConstrue wrote:
2 years ago.

I was overly confident in those days. It was at a jazz club and after having 6 shots of vodka and feeling dead sexy, I asked this guy friend whom I frequently talked to if he wanted to go out some other time. He gave me a weird look like wtf is wrong with you?

I'd forgotten it was him and his new girlfriend that drove me at the club in the first place. There she was staring at me like a cat ready to pounce on its prey.

It was the most humilating experience in my life.... :cry:


Her reaction was very normal, don't expect asking out taken people without having aggressive reactions from the person in question and from his/her partner.

And alcohol just make people way more honest, so because of this she has realized your real intentions and that that you are a direct threat to her.



LePetitPrince
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03 Jul 2009, 9:29 am

It's not about courage, I never really asked out anyone , it just happened few time automatically. It's about being accepted, if the person obviously admitting her admiration whether verbally or non-verbally(and this is the hardest part) then things become easy.

I never ask out a girl that I have no idea what she thinks about me.



MDD123
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03 Jul 2009, 9:39 am

LePetitPrince wrote:
It's not about courage, I never really asked out anyone , it just happened few time automatically. It's about being accepted, if the person obviously admitting her admiration whether verbally or non-verbally(and this is the hardest part) then things become easy.

I never ask out a girl that I have no idea what she thinks about me.


I've learned that the hard way myself, all I have to show for my experiences is the same advice you have.



Kenjuudo
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03 Jul 2009, 10:13 am

About 4 years ago. She accepted and we were together for about 2 years.

I don't really have a problem asking girls out. I just don't do it, because I don't want to.


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MONKEY
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03 Jul 2009, 12:55 pm

About 3 years ago, I asked my best friend out through email, he said no, I had to pretend it was a joke because I was so embarrased.


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03 Jul 2009, 1:34 pm

As an NT, this is an interesting thread for me to read.

This Aspie I knew in college over 20 years ago - I could tell he wanted to ask me out, but I was sure he never would.

He actually did. I was so shocked, I ended up marrying him a few years later.



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03 Jul 2009, 1:38 pm

I've never asked anyone out, simply because I have never noticed anyone being interested in me. Doesn't necessarily make me a "coward"...



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03 Jul 2009, 3:13 pm

MONKEY wrote:
About 3 years ago, I asked my best friend out through email, he said no, I had to pretend it was a joke because I was so embarrased.

Aww, sad. I probably would've covered like "Aww, you should've said yes! Then we coulda had pancakes >:3" or something like that XD;



MDD123
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03 Jul 2009, 6:57 pm

What helps me ask people out is having a good concept of why I like them. I mean just because she's an attractive girl doesn't mean you need to ask her out, that's the peer pressure talking, if she's an attractive girl and I can enjoy her company, I have a good reason for asking her out. Unfortunately for me, I usually enjoy the company of boss or instructor types and end up in an ackward situation for that, you'd have to admit though I'm in a pretty good setup for a challenge.



HamOfCydonia
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03 Jul 2009, 9:57 pm

If I am interested in someone, I always ask them out rather than waiting to see if they ask me. It makes it much less confusing. If they say no then it is over with and if they say yes then it has a good outcome without having to undergo all the 'aaargh'



Blasty
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04 Jul 2009, 12:50 am

January 10 of this year, and I'm still with her! :D



MissConstrue
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04 Jul 2009, 1:55 am

LePetitPrince wrote:
MissConstrue wrote:
2 years ago.

I was overly confident in those days. It was at a jazz club and after having 6 shots of vodka and feeling dead sexy, I asked this guy friend whom I frequently talked to if he wanted to go out some other time. He gave me a weird look like wtf is wrong with you?

I'd forgotten it was him and his new girlfriend that drove me at the club in the first place. There she was staring at me like a cat ready to pounce on its prey.

It was the most humilating experience in my life.... :cry:


Her reaction was very normal, don't expect asking out taken people without having aggressive reactions from the person in question and from his/her partner.

And alcohol just make people way more honest, so because of this she has realized your real intentions and that that you are a direct threat to her.


Yeah I know, still sucks though huh...


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04 Jul 2009, 2:58 am

MissConstrue wrote:
LePetitPrince wrote:
MissConstrue wrote:
2 years ago.

I was overly confident in those days. It was at a jazz club and after having 6 shots of vodka and feeling dead sexy, I asked this guy friend whom I frequently talked to if he wanted to go out some other time. He gave me a weird look like wtf is wrong with you?

I'd forgotten it was him and his new girlfriend that drove me at the club in the first place. There she was staring at me like a cat ready to pounce on its prey.

It was the most humilating experience in my life.... :cry:


Her reaction was very normal, don't expect asking out taken people without having aggressive reactions from the person in question and from his/her partner.

And alcohol just make people way more honest, so because of this she has realized your real intentions and that that you are a direct threat to her.


Yeah I know, still sucks though huh...

BRAVE!! !

I asked a guy friend of mine out on a date but he turned me down and proceeded to stop hanging out with me. He kind of freaked out because we are both guys.



Tohlagos
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05 Jul 2009, 12:15 am

Chair wrote:
When's the last time you had the courage to ask anyone out?


Over three years ago. The anxiety associated with it all can be to much (even if the venture is successful).

After a string of not-so-nice relationships many years ago, I finally arrived at a place in my life about three years ago that being alone was more fun/interesting to me than seeking social interaction with a woman on any given level.



Keeno
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05 Jul 2009, 7:24 am

Interesting how the poll answers are bunched at both extremes (within last couple of months, and never). With the "never" in mind, this seems a good time, again, to plug the Love-Shyness book online at http://www.love-shy.com/Gilmartin/toc.html.

Which reminds me also, Jessica Kingsley Publishers have brought out a book about love-shyness, and Asperger's, which I keep forgetting to order. Dr Gilmartin's original book has obviously been influential in the Asperger world.

I have fallen somewhere in between the two extremes - last three years when I capitalised on the opportunity to ask a co-worker out on a date. It was only one date as I didn't really know how to develop things further. Neither has it been more recent, because the opportunities to meet women whom I'd be able to ask out on dates haven't come up.



littlegreenleaf
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11 Jul 2009, 5:39 pm

Never have, though the one time I was in that sort of situation, I think it was more of a pride issue than a courage issue. And at that point, it didn't look like it was going to work anyway.