Is there much that a romantic relationship can add to your life that would actually make it better? Even if there are a few nice things that go along with a relationship, are they worth it?
Alla wrote:
Are you in it for the sex? You can probably get the sex without being in a relationship
sex is better in a relationship. much, much better. i've done it both ways. so maybe it is possible to have it without the relationship, but the quality suffers.
Alla wrote:
Are you with someone because you need him/her to support you emotionally? Friends and family can do that?
my family is dysfuntional and friends jump ship after no more than 2 years, so that it defnitely not true for me. for some reason, i can make romantic love work in a way that i cannot do with friends or family. and i would not trade it.
Alla wrote:
Do you need someone to help pay part of your rent/bills? A roomate can do that.?
financial reasons are important when raising children.
Alla wrote:
Do you need validation that you are smart, beautiful, etc.? Again, family, friends, colleagues can do that.?
no, they can't. the level of validation from friends and family can never, ever approach the feeling that someone out there deeply, heartachingly loves you for being you.
Alla wrote:
Do, what would a romantic relationship add to your life that you can't eassily find in any other person or group of people?
all of the above. each item is improved by having a relationship. also, there is the aspect of doing these things for someone else. to really connect with someone on a relationship level is deeper than any friendship or family relationship i've ever seen. the man i am married to knows everything, really
about me, and we are fully joined together in a perhaps inexplicable way. but it took years to get there.