Younger man dating older women

Page 1 of 1 [ 13 posts ] 

dt18
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 11 Mar 2010
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 413

25 Oct 2012, 12:50 am

Ok guys, so I have a bit of a situation right now. I took this girl out for coffee, then she told me she was 27 - I'm 21. Needless to say, we ended up hitting it off, and we're pretty into each other. Surprisingly, she wasn't taken aback by my social awkwardness associated with my autism. First girlfriend I ever had and first girl to actually like me and accept me for me. The only thing is...my parents. My dad asked me about my coffee date and asked me how old the girl is and I told him. And he's like look for someone your own age, and I had to lie and tell him we are just friends. We both agreed we had to hide this from our parents, but I really don't want to break this off. Gotta love taboos. Any of you ever been in this type of a situation?



eric76
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 31 Aug 2012
Gender: Male
Posts: 10,660
Location: In the heart of the dust bowl

25 Oct 2012, 3:18 am

A six year age difference is meaningless since both of you are adults.

When I was 20, I took out a woman once who's kids were my age and older. If I had known her husband was asleep on the sofa, I wouldn't have done it.

She ticked me off when she insulted a friend of mine that night because he looked like he was about 10 or 11 when he was actually 18. I never saw her again after that.



JesseCat
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 26 Dec 2011
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 228

25 Oct 2012, 4:02 am

Honestly I don't see what the big deal is. The age difference isn't large at all and you are both young and in your 20's. If you like her I say keep dating her.



Stalk
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Jul 2012
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,136

25 Oct 2012, 6:03 am

I guess your dad is trying to say that when she reaches her 30s, she will want to have kids and settle down, and you will be the one that wants to party. That is a generalization that most people make about women and men. I found that some men want to settle down in their 30s and their girlfriends/wives want to go party all the time. If the relationships become serious, you will have to have the talk about kids with your GF and then tell your dad about your own decision. That is if you are ready to have that conversation.

Your dad would most likely think in the lines of, why would he want to tie himself down now when he still has his whole life ahead. Some guys just want to, some don't. You will have to be clear to your dad that what ever happens, it was your decision and that you are happy with that, nobody manipulated you into making that decision.



Stargazer43
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Nov 2011
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,604

25 Oct 2012, 7:05 am

That's not that big of an age difference, I don't see anything wrong with it



Prof_Pretorius
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Aug 2006
Age: 66
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,520
Location: Hiding in the attic of the Arkham Library

25 Oct 2012, 7:51 am

Not a big deal.
The Missus is 14 years older than I am. Work on the relationship instead.


_________________
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow. I feel my fate in what I cannot fear. I learn by going where I have to go. ~Theodore Roethke


curlyfry
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 13 Jun 2010
Age: 55
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,502
Location: Latitude : 45.373. Longitude : -84.955

25 Oct 2012, 9:07 am

That's not a big age difference and seems a bit sexist since I hear of a lot of guys being 6 yrs older then their girlfriends. I was thinking the post was about cougars :lol: Just don't let her be controlling (unless you prefer that).

Congratulations and have fun.



blueroses
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 Feb 2007
Age: 41
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,168
Location: Lancaster, PA

25 Oct 2012, 12:16 pm

What Curlyfry said.

It might not hurt to take it slow and not get too serious about this relationship too quickly, though. I say this just because you seem to really like this girl so far and sometimes women date younger guys because they are looking for something light. (Or eye candy. :) )

This isn't always the case, of course, but it can be sometimes. Actually, just last weekend, my younger brother called me up and was really upset because he'd been head-over-heels-in-love with some college instructor he was seeing and, as it turned out, she was just looking to have some fun and enjoy his company for a little while. (They had a much bigger age difference than you guys do, though).

Still, it's never a bad idea to enjoy taking the time to get to know someone and let things develop over time, if they are meant to.



IrishTusk
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 3 Sep 2009
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 239
Location: Leven, Fife

25 Oct 2012, 3:22 pm

Hey, She has more Experiance than women your own age unless they're loose.

Nothing better than a Girl that knows what she is doing ;)


_________________
Your Aspie score: 56 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 144 of 200
You are very likely neurotypical


dt18
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 11 Mar 2010
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 413

26 Oct 2012, 12:58 am

Thanks for the feedback! I appreciate it, this really helps. The furthest we've gone is making out and that's the furthest I intend on making it stay for a while. I, personally, am taking a wait and see approach with this relationship. There's definitely some chemistry there, but time will tell if this will last or not. I'm just taking this a day at a time. But, so far, I like what I see in this girl and hopefully it works out.



richardbenson
Xfractor Card #351
Xfractor Card #351

User avatar

Joined: 30 Oct 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 13,553
Location: Leave only a footprint behind

26 Oct 2012, 8:31 pm

There's nothing wrong with those age ranges. I wanna marry a cougar myself, perferbly a rich one! :D



LeeAnderson
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Oct 2008
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 936
Location: Cookeville, Tennessee

26 Oct 2012, 8:33 pm

I just gotta say congratulations, man. I see nothing wrong with it. Introduce the girl to your parents and have her introduce you to hers and all will be fine. Love will find a way. :D



lostintime
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

User avatar

Joined: 18 Oct 2012
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 23
Location: Canada

27 Oct 2012, 8:11 am

I dated a girl for a little while who was 30 when I was 24. Age is just a number. But be aware that older girls often are looking for marriage or a long-term commitment. See where it goes. I got the feeling the she wanted to be much more serious but I wasn't ready for that at the time. Why not date this girl a little longer and when you both are comfortable then you can just go hang out with your parents and they should get the idea.


_________________
Male, 25, Canada