Online dating is hopeless.

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I could never be with someone who was my exact opposite. It would be a disaster.

Tim

Is it just me or is OKCupid so attractive because the 3000+ question personality test that can match you up with others so you can avoid a lot of the social experimentation to find the right person? (Getting together for coffee, talking on the phone, etc). Are a lot of people on WP also on OKCupid??

The quizzes were the real attraction. Signed up in a vain hope that they would somehow manage to accumulate into one grand personality test. Still, the huge question base is kind of like that.

Anyone want to compare results?

I'm calandale1.

Once, just for fun (and because I was bored) I signed up with eHarmony. Even though I set it so that I was interested in matches only within my own city metro area, the only match they found for me lived in a small town 600 miles away (in the next province, no less), someone who liked hiking and camping and the outdoors (none of which I like at all). Some "match".

Obviously you have not figured out the rules of the internet. Social interaction is not done in real-time, thus eliminating the need for certain responses and allowing time to formulate a better response. I think if you actually interacted with another human being (this is possibly why you are such an ass) you would find that this one of the attractions of the internet...that the same social rules do not apply. If someone does not reply to an e-mail I send, no harm/no foul. If I walk up to someone and say hi and they ignore me, I am deeply offended. Please go online more often and research the differences between the internet and real life.

And if you have AS YOU should know by now not to be so god damn judgemental.

Very true phenomenon, though a bit harsh. However, people can be offended online also - they've put themselves out there and you're letting them hang. They made the effort of contacting you and clearly want a response. You should make it known that you are shy or may not reply to them for whatever reason - the problem with the internet is that you don't know if you're being ignored or not.

I think it really comes down to a matter of opinion...if I wrote someone I found interesting I would MUCH rather have them not reply at all (and allow the possibility they are no longer on the site, never got my message, etc) than have them write back saying they weren't interesting in speaking with me. I have had both happen (and even being written back in a polite, civil way) and I MUCH preferred not being written at all.

I usually just hide from them. But recently, I've started writing back, explaining that I don't want to deal with IM's until I understand them a little better (motivations ect). It seems to keep them away, which I guess is ok. I can't imagine why I'd want to have an IM discussion with anyone I didn't know, and am frightened of the kind of person who would.

IMs with strangers are the realization of the dreaded Small Talk. If there is something particular about their profile that makes me want to know more about them or something in specific they want to ask or talk about with me, that's one thing...but the IMs that say "hey I like your profile, what's up " I just don't know what to do with. That even goes for friends as well, just IMing me to say what's up...do they really care or do they have something in mind they'd like to get around to talking about??