Should I be with an older woman?

Post Reply New Topic

I dumped Mary. It was th worst breakup in history, she said she's sitting in the corner of her room crying. I feel really guilty for hurting her.

She's so much better off. No more orders on what not to eat! No more never-met fiancée who has zero desire for kids when she already has one .

To me it sounds like he is begging them to take advantage of himself to get in the country, Idk. And he knows it and is fine with it, sounds like he wants a hot maid with benefits rather than a loving partner.

Do not delude yourself into thinking that this woman wants more than a green card.

I see it here in England, beautiful Asian women with older or less attractive men. Accept that it is a business arrangement and be prepared to spoil her with large amounts of money.

Like the others have said, even if you have no (or little) relationship experience you still have an extremely unrealistic and incorrect idea of women in general and what relationship are supposed to be about.

But, I actually have no judgements of you whatsoever. I'm just regurgitating what the other's have said.

I agree with what they say but I'm not going to be one to tell you how to live your life.

In the end it's all your choice, and I'm not actually sure what you want.

Do you want to pay the money to bring her over or could you honestly not give two damns about her?

It seems you'd rather rectify the situation with Michelle more than anything else. How is that going?

If things don't work out with Michelle, are you trying to tell us Mary would be your last resort, and if she should be your last resort? Again, that's up to you, but it seems clear you don't particularly feel for her the way she does for you.

EDIT: Oh, seems you've dumped Mary. Well, what's your plan of action now is a better question?

I understand that you don't like my attempts to pick up girls who live in the Philippines and I don't blame you, maybe you are right. The thing is, Michelle also lives in the Philippines, she's really like a younger, prettier version of Mary with a more interesting personality (I found Mary's constant submissiveness to be kind of boring)

No probs, if I had a beautiful Asian woman, I'd love to dote on her and shower her with gifts.

Maybe she can do those things and love me too. Would she not love the man who rescued her from poverty?

I get that but I work long hours and the girl is unemployed.

Here's a not so hypothetical scenario for you. If a guy is working up to 12 hour days and his partner is unemployed, should they split the housework 50-50 or should the partner do it all?

I told Michelle that if she gets a job, we would split the housework 50-50, until she got a job, she could do it. I told her this and she said she was quite happy with it.

Ugh. This post is so, so gross. Just ugh.

You never even met her and you've known her for a short time, and you two were talking about marriage. Come on dude...

I don't know, man. I don't think the age gap is that bad. (after all, it's only 3 years) The land gap doesn't seem all too bad either, since she seems to be willing to travel and it seems that you are doing fine vocationally. So, in that regard, you're fine. However, there are some things to consider here.

She seems to be acting pretty suspicious behavior that, at least to me, drips with the term "Gold Digger". You know, how she was so eager to marry you. How she keeps emphasizing that she loves you. How she follows your every whim. How her proclamations of love seem devoid of passion. Even if she isn't in it for the money, these things suggests she has an alterior motive. You implied that she's more mature than you, so it seems doubtful to me that she is doing it all out of blind love, as that sort of thing fades with maturity.

I'm not sure. I could be totally wrong, but I feel her motives are questionable.

To be fair I talked about marriage with Mei La a very short time after I met her and I was dating her, as in we lived in the same city and saw each other IRL. Mei La actually got a lot more interested in me after I said I would marry her and this made me think that maybe commitment was an aphrodisiac for some women.

And when I asked if a woman would love me for rescuing me from poverty, I wasn't referring to Mary specifically, just third world women in general, which ever one I end up with.You are right, Mary was passionless and said she wanted to marry me within hours of contacting me.

Michelle took about two months to go from friendship to wanting a relationship with me and afterwards she sounded muuuch more passionate about it than Mary.

I don't mean passionate in a lustful way, the love-starved Michelle kept saying she needed to be hugged and kissed but said she had little interest in sex. Mary talked about sex a lot, usually she was the one who brought it up, either because she's a nymphomaniac or more likely because she thought it would appeal to me.

I suspect Michelle was a demisexual, since after a certain point she went from being anti-sex to being pro-sex.

I see, but marriage is a serious thing man. It is just my humble opinion, but it doesn't seem wise to me to use it to hit on girls that you don't even know well.

You are right, marriage is a very serious thing. With Mary, who I didn't like that much anyway, I wished I could date her for a few months before committing to marriage (or better yet, date her for a few months before not committing to marriage) but an unfortunate downside of trying to get with a Philippine girl (one of many) is that the class 300 Visa requires marriage.

I might find marriage agreeable but I hate weddings, including my own.

What do you mean with this?