Quiet Reflections on a Growing Polyamorous Community

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I've been thinking a lot lately about how much the conversation around love, relationships, and identity has changed over the years—even in spaces like this one. More and more, I see people exploring different ways of connecting, including those who identify with or are curious about polyamory. It's not something that used to come up all that often, especially not in neurodivergent spaces, but lately it's been appearing more, gently, here and there.

I think it's worth reflecting on how this shift might mean something—maybe for some of us more than others. Being autistic or otherwise neurodivergent can make romantic relationships feel like navigating a maze where the walls keep changing. Sometimes we struggle with societal expectations, sensory needs, emotional intensity, or simply how we experience attachment. So it's interesting to see that, just maybe, the world is slowly becoming more open to relationship structures that don't fit the usual mold.

Polyamory, at its heart, is just one path among many. It’s not a better or more enlightened way to love—just a different one. Some find strength in the freedom to form multiple meaningful connections, while others may find comfort in monogamy, or even choose to opt out of romantic relationships entirely. There’s no right answer. But the fact that more people feel safe enough to even have the conversation feels like progress.

I’ve noticed a few posts and comments around the site that hint at this quiet shift—a subtle openness to exploring love in broader ways. It makes me wonder how many of us have been thinking about these things privately but haven't quite known how (or if) to bring them up. There's still a lot of stigma out there, and even in spaces meant for support, talking about something as personal and nuanced as relationship choice can feel vulnerable.

That said, I do think this forum is one of the rare places where these conversations can happen with a little understanding and kindness. Whether you're polyamorous, monogamous, asexual, aromantic, or somewhere else entirely on the map, I think it's worth acknowledging how complex, diverse, and valid our emotional worlds can be.

I'm not really here to pitch polyamory or argue for any "ideal" way to love. I just wanted to reflect, quietly, on how the conversation has been changing—and maybe open the floor a bit. If you’ve been seeing the same trends or thinking about these topics, feel free to share your thoughts. How do you feel about relationship diversity in neurodivergent communities? Do you feel there's more space now for people to be honest about what they want or need?

Thanks for reading. No pressure to reply—sometimes it's enough just to feel seen.

I clicked on number 5

I chose Choice #2

I don't really understand the appeal of polygamous relationships, although I DO get how a monogamous relationship can get repetitive & boring!! !

And some people like my brother aren't even interested in romantic relationships at all which is perfectly valid!

My vote is for~ 2, I prefer monogamous relationships. All three of my relationships have been monogamous. I find it extremely difficult to get close to & feel comfortable with one person & having another person involved could make things a LOT more complicated & worse.

However I might be open to considering a three-way relationship thing with my current girlfriend. Cass is bi & the only people we've been sexual with has been each other. We're both majorly bad at sex due to our inexperience & health issues. Cass finds it easier to avoid sex which would be mostly OK with me except she keeps talking about various sexual stuff & also says she wants to have sex at some point but that point almost never happens. Some others would probably consider that teasing. Me & her both think it might be good if an experienced bi woman were to help teach us but it takes a lot for me & Cass to feel comfortable & close with anyone & some random person we barely know would be too much.

Another problem is probably that me & Cass don't really have any in person friends. Me & her both tend to be very passive homebodies in general. There's various places Cass would like to go & do things but she needs someone to lead her into things. I'd readily agree to go most anywhere & do most anything with her but I need to be directed with it. Having a friend or someone a bit more who was a tad more outgoing might be good for me & Cass. Plus Cass spends a bit of time visiting her family & I get bored & aimless after a day or two. Cass says I need someone to talk to & spend time with besides just her.

I def would not actively seek someone else. Cass has better social skills than me & I'd be branded a creep if I were to try making a move on anyone. It's a lot easier & safer for me to not try.

Hahaa bring out your taboo's... Nice topic Sable Noctis

Monogamie all the way for me, but I understand that this is a personal matter of capacity and preference.
I can understand polygamie as analogous to having multiple children. More children, does not mean that you have to subdivide your heart and limit. it means your heart grows bigger.

But, for my personal limbic system, I can but give my all to one person when in a partner-passionate-love relationship.
And I expect them to do the same, not because of jealousy. But because I cannot passionately align with/or commit to someone if mentally we're offset.

kind regards,
Kada

I have only been in monogamous relationships but I wish that I was confident enough to an open relationship.

When you look at monogamy: 'okay, we're together now and neither of us can't have sex or share love with someone else for the duration of this relationship' it seems a little old fashioned and restrictive. But I still prefer it over an open relationship.

The fact that it's now more acceptable to discuss, or be in, open relationships is great. In the UK there's even a tv programme in which couples who are willing to open up their relationship can try doing that in a special kind of retreat. It's great that it's come to this level of acceptance.

Honestly I just got to thinking. Not really sure what else to do with my time. I just wish I could find that second special someone . Alas I'm looking for a needle in a hay stack, I don't mean I'm being picky I just haven't found anyone who would understand or accept and not get Jealous or start fights over nothing.. and I don't watch TV that most certainly isn't worth my time Sensationalist Nonsense but then that's most of Daytime or Reality TV, its always painted in a certain way and it doesn't reflect real life IMO.

I'm a boring monogamist

But each to their own...