Is it possibe...

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I was interested as to whether anyone here has had a successful relationship with someone who is also aspergic. Can 2 aspergics have a relationship? I'm asking because I've recently met a guy over the web and thought it could be difficult if we both have soical difficulties. Has anyone got any thoughts or experiences?

It would be much appreciated

o ya of course its possible it could be fun

I mean you would understand each other better I think it could be really good cuz you would be a better couple i think

I think we are as varied as everyone else as far as individual personalities and such, but overall I'm not saying it would be better or worse, but it would be very very entertaining. I'm not saying it would be a trainwreck but more like a star going supernova. Really really intense. I think I'd rather enjoy it.

Tell us more about this guy from the web, because their personality can have an effect. Depends how far which way on the spectrum they are...

I believe it can work. Be aware that interaction online/text vs. in person/verbal with someone on the spectrum can be two different things. Would need more information to reply more specifically.


M.

I went to a "special school" for a few years (sorry I don't have cooler words for it)
and usually got along with almost all the others there.
It was like paradise compared to public school which was more like hell.

Internet relationships seem very deceptive to me, especially in the NT domains,
so I don't seek them, nor do I often see success in others with them.

I don't know if private schools for learning disablilities are nicer in general,
because some things have changed since then, and those things have put mine
out of business. New bureaucratic formality structures have eliminated caring, I'd say.

Think it could work out great, was with a girl with ADHD for some
time, she was like a tornado wrapped in a storm, she wore me out
like you wouldn`t belive and we were comlete opposites, but it was
great. If that worked i guess anything is possible. I would feel very
comfortable being with someone with some of the same "quirks" as
myself i think, i would really understand it anyway and maybe the
other person would also

It can work, sure. It just requires you to have a lot more in common than your diagnosis, if you share some interests and if your characters attract each other than the fact he has AS or not becomes just a detail. So if the relationship (should this develop) succeeds or not will more depend on his general personality than on his Aspieness. But yes, it can work, there are several AS couples I have met, I don't know them in detail but I have met a few who were seeing another aspergic and whom have a great relationship.

I do think it can be a benefit maybe because you both understand each others' difficulties better without the need to explain anything, and also shared pains can bring you closer together (hence why people with psychological issues often get along well, even when their diagnosis is slightly different). I am not saying being AS or NT will be the decisive factor in the relationship's chances of success, but I would definitely not say that being both Aspergic would be a negative factor.



Good luck with it

Thanks everyone. He's a few years older and seems rather introverted, I don't know him that well yet. He seems nice though, and its the fact that he seems more "sensitive" thats attracted me to him. But it takes him forever to reply to any messages I send him (which is quite frustrating). Does it take anyone else days to reply to an email?

Well, it can do, yeah. Do you know he's checked his emails between you sending it and him replying? It might be that it's only then that he got to it.

He got the messages on the day I sent them, but then waits...

I confess I do sit on emails for days sometimes. I don't know why...I guess I just get anxious trying to figure out what to say. And none of my emails are from girls, either....we're talking regular work and friend emails here.

I have a few friends who write back only once a week or sometimes it takes them longer to reply. Some of them are really close friends who write lengthy and personal mails, however they just don't access internet daily. So it does not have to be worrying. Do you actually know for sure he did read the emails the days before he replied to you? He may be not into internet that much, or maybe he has no home connection?

This is what has happened to me some times:
If i get a message for some reason from someone i like
that way, i usually start to think of what i should say back,
and then it goes downhill i think too much on it, putting
it off and suddenly 3 days has passed. I have even a few
times never answered because i felt it had gone so much
time that i would have to explain why i replied so late..
After that i feel bad about it and kick myself for being me.
So a late reply can i some cases be a guy twisting his mind
on what to say because you make him go a little blank

Thanks, thats all really heplful
Good news, he replied, what a relief! I guess he's like what a couple of you guys have said, having to think about for a while before replying.

May I ask: does the mail program you use to mail him, allow you to see if he received and read the message? Because if that is not the case, he may just not access the web everyday and this could perfectly explain why he reads your messages with a delay.

In the end he replies everytime and that is a good sign. I really hope things work out for you