Is "You'll find love one day" BS?

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Odds against US(????) I'm not sure I actually HAVE Asperger's...I mean, I have a lot of the traits albeit some of them are in a milder form than what an outsider (NT) would consider CLASSIC Asperger's. Whatever I have, it has been DEBILITATING and I feel beaten down by it and the circumstances I've found myself in.

Where am I meeting these women?

At work and in the social situations where I can interact with others. I particularly detest the clingy, needy types. Someone once had a siggy that read something like, "Do not lead, for I may not follow...Do not follow me, for I might not lead...Do not walk beside me - yadda, yadda, yadda." I couldn't have worded it BETTER!

For some reason, people seem to think I'm the type of guy to settle down with. They fail to really know who they're dealing with and get HUGELY disappointed. Or they get angry and vengeful because I won't fall into their preconceived notions of who they think I should be.

One female friend of mine said people always assume I'm so nice and "bake cookies everyday...lalala." Then she said, "No you AREN'T...you can be a mean f#@$er!"

My best way to describe me is to tell someone to go down under, climb a eucalyptus tree, and TRY to pet A HUNGRY KOALA BEAR." Lemme know how THAT works out for ya'.

Does THAT sound like sombody LOOKING FOR LOVE?

And you constantly put yourself down about how worthless and unlovable
you are and you don't do anything to improve your lot in life.

I have what I like and I am happy with it. You whine all the time and need to be validated.

I saw what happens to people who care more about validation from strangers than themselves and it doesn't turn out well.

That's a fallacy. Your observation, though true, does not challenge Toad's accusation of Roissy's blog being misogynistic.

What is misogynistic about looking out for yourself?

When 'looking out for yourself' is actually self serving self indulgence at the expense of women.

At the expense of women? Please. You can have something they want (alpha traits, money,etc) and they have something you want. It is a simple exchange.

Misogyny is hatred of women. Perhaps you mean chauvinistic or selfish?

Selfish and chauvinistic are just synonyms for realistic.

Sure, I don't dispute that.



Yes, possibly. Misogyny being, I suppose, a state of mind or a feeling, not a behaviour.

Just don't treat people badly, whether male or female. That's all I wanted to say!

May you all be happy.

I don't like mistreating people either. I just got sick feeling used and put into the friend zone hence why I prefer escorts to "real" women.

I'm the same. I'm 42 this year and I've NEVER had a lover. I don't even know what it's like to be loved or to love. I've fallen in love tons of times but all to no avail. I've never even got close to finding out what it's like. Everybody says you'll find someone one day, but it's all BS. I wish it wasn't and I can't stop wanting it, but it is all BS. Then again, there's a book called Aspergers in Love by Maxine Aston [I've not read it yet] about couples when one of the partners has AS. So I suppose it is possible on many occasions. It just hasn't happened to me yet. I can't imagine it ever will, to be honest. I will always be alone. I always have been, and I always will be. That's just the way it is.

Where are you? I'm male and nearly 42 and I've never known love. To be honest, I've come onto this forum thing to find love. I've looked everywhere else! ha ha

You just have to embrace being single.

Ultimately, unless the person telling me this has invented a time machine, traveled to the future, witessed me and my girlfriend/wife in love and returned to tell me about without somehow negatively affecting the timeline, I take their statement as BS.

I didn't until last year, and really until this year. However, love found me from the weirdest town.

Embrace it. Read the horror stories of guys who have been divorced and lost nearly everything. Love sounds nice on paper until you read the fine print.