what women want

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Once again riley your neglecting your status as a female. Yeah, society SAIS you should dress up to impress men, but you don't need to in order to fulfill your womanly desires... You are the prize, men line up for you. Try actually having competition and actually having to make the approach and courting a man. The whole attraction system is one sided. Go around and ask how many aspie females on here have a partner, then ask the aspie males.

I certainly blame them too. That's why I've asked before what the heck is so great about confidence and so forth.



So you're saying that "nice guys" don't act like grown ups? I'm insulted.

You blame everyone but yourself. The way people perceive your lack of confidence and poor sense of humour can't possibly be something to do with you? It has to be womens' fault?

snake: I agree with riley and I'm not a female. I think it's horrendous that you'd dismiss her thoughts on the basis of her being a female. Going by that reasoning, should we then not dismiss all your thoughts on how people with AS are treated because you have AS?

I don't. I dress up for myself and because I can.. and please do not tell me what my 'status' as a female is.. it's always changing.
As for my 'womanly desires'... all those fullstops you added kind of creeped me out.

womanly desires...

A guy has to be actually desirable first.

No they don't.. contrary to popular opinion attractive women can sometimes be too intimidating to approach. Intelligence can also be off putting. I've been told I should 'dumb myself down' but I've decided if I have to do that they aren't worth my time anyway. I'm also not a 'prize' to be won.. you will notice that most married men have married friends.. not some girl behind curtain no3.

Yeah. Women have to figure out which guys are after them and which ones are after sex.. that takes alot of energy.

I don't have a partner.


I'll give you a heads up.. if you think something is wrong with you.. and behave accordingly; women will pick up on that. Why would they choose you if even you don't think you measure up? You've lost before you've even left the gate.

but I don't recall calling you either..

What I'm saying isn't an attack on anyone, I'm just pointing it out... The woman is the "object of desire", basically a woman can usually get a dick whenever she wants it. Those who are single are either between relationships or have chosen to remain single for their time being. It is us men who have to line up for rejection... There are a few slight exception in women who look more masculine or don't look very female, but as a society we've always put the favor in to the woman in socialising and finding potential mates. In the wild 2 men always fought for a common woman.
I'm not attacking women here, but what I'm saying is true. This is why men have lower standards than women, because women can afford to have higher standards. I've even had women admit this to me. And when I said you were the prize, I didn't mean your a total object... Society makes you the object of the game, meaning men line up for you, or even if not you can find Mr. Right Now without too much of an effort. This is why 90 % of sexual predators are men (and I am NOT condoning them, I repeat I am NOT condoning them). I wouldn't be surprised if there were alot of misguided aspies amoung those numbers.
But I will critize men where it's due too, I think it's stupid that men who get alot of action are honored and treated as heros and such, but women who get alot of action are treated as sluts.

This is where you fail miserably at understanding women.
Women don't want just any dick.. if there are 5000 guys cueing up she might reject them ALL if they aren't her type .. even if she is feeling a need to fulfill her 'womanly desires'.

Well perhaps if you were actually interested in the woman and not just 'vagina' you might get a second glance. You seem convinced that if a woman is horny enough she should accept anything.

I've seen women fight over men.

Read carefully:
Women have higher standards because women, compared to men who can walk away, are extreamily limited in how much offspring they can have. They have to invest an incredible amount into birthing [I know thats the wrong word] and caring for those children. When a woman is looking for a potential mate.. she is subconciously contemplating pregnancy to him. To go through 9 months of carrying a human being in her belly, then squeezing it out in agonising labour, to raise it and provide for it, to ensure it's gentically healthy.. the father would have to be pretty darn special and not just 'any' dick.

I'm sure they would if I started sitting on their laps acting like I might put out.. but they don't right now.
Tell me.. why would turning into a slut be advantagous? If I was REALLY desperate in fulfilling my 'womanly desires' with Mr. Right Now.. I'd be better off meeting Buzz than risking countless stds or unplanned unnamed pregancy. Indeed.. I am not the 'object' of the game. I am not playing the game.. that does not mean I will miss out completely.. it just means that I believe relationships can be built on things other than just sex.. if you weren't trying to 'play the game' you might start seeing women as potential friends as well instead of something that will ease that RSI.

If you mean by 'alot of action' where are young woman screws as many guys as she can so she can feel some sort of affection only to be kicked out of bed in the morning.. no I don't condone it. If she is just asserting herself and is emotionally secure and not being harmed, used or disrespected.. best of luck to her.

Last edited by riley on 09 Jun 2006, 1:03 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I'm a woman, not an object. Society does not makes us objects. Misguided men making stereotypes about how women can have any guy they want do. Women are not the only ones that ignore members of the opposite sex, so quit putting it all on us. If I did not know some genuine nice guys in real life, some of these posts would make playing for the same team much more appealing.

I don't agree with how society makes women out to be the object, I don't agree with it one bit. But, it is as it is, and because of this women have an advantage over guys.

I agree it's degrating, but it also provides you an advantage. I mean, seriously, lemme give you an example... A male cop pulls over a female driver for speeding, and she gets out of it by flashing her tits or offering the cop a bj, now lets see this the other way around... Lets say it's a female cop pulling a male driver... The man flashes his penis at the woman, she gets terribly offended and files charges, the man is lucky if he doesn't get the doodoo smacked out of him.

Females have even admitted this to me.

I'm going to leave this thread before I say something I won't regret.

He's talking about not having to put up with the same level of rejection and lack of companionship, many women get into relationships for many reasons OTHER then because they 'really dig a guy', many women cannot stand being alone. This is where he's coming from: Most women do not have problems finding companionship and sex, and yes, women do get into relationships with guys even if they don't really dig them that much: It's called relationship of convenience. Many men are more alone then women. Just go look at the number of guys looking for women online compared to women looking for men.



Again what's wrong with relationships based on sex and attraction and not much else? I've seen it countless times. I know girls who have the "guy who gives them fantastic sex" while they are with the "boyfriend" who supports and helps defray her cost of living, or they have relationships with boyfriends that are totally based on their own lust and they think its "love". Then the guy could be drinking ou every night, be poor, cheating on her with multiple women and she will still say "But I love him!". Many women keep men around to use them, or as "fall back" guys, open your eyes. I'm not accusing women or saying they are bad, I'm saying that : Most men are whipped by their lust and loneliness, hence they get used, and women know this. Ever see women just reject guys and laugh at them getting and ego boost? What if the situation was reversed and the custom was for girls to approach guys and get rejected? They'd start to understand the dynamics better.



True but the man has already been "screened" or selected for.




Come on, it's not about pregnancy at all, we have condoms and birth control... he's still fundamentally correct. But I do not think it is a negative thing, nor should it be used as justification to "hate" on women or whine about the situation.




Again with men, they don't want just p****, many are so lonely they are dying for any kind of human companionship. You have to understand many men are alone for much longer periods then women and this is an unhealthy thing and it fuels depression and other negative things.

Most sociological stuff I've read says clearly that women dress for other women. Most men have no interest in womens clothes.


Could you tell us which list this is?;)

In spirit of reconciliation, I think that again this is all just showing how male and female have very different experiences, hence differing opinions. Riley, you appear concerned about just being treated as a sex object. Well thats understandable and perfectly reasonable as I assume this is based on your lifes experience. Then we have some men who appear concerned about NOT being treated as a sex object. And that is also reasonable given the typical AS male experience. There's no right or wrong in this, it's like a cow and a lion arguing about whether grass or meat is the best food.

However, I don't think anybody, male or female, should feel any shame about wanting sex and not much else. After all, it is one of the most pleasurable activities we can indulge in. And apparently vital to a healthy emotional state. My personal experience is that if you think it's something to be ashamed of and 'nice men don't behave like that' so you pretend you're not interested, you get judged as asexual, hence wierd, hence ignored and potentially very emotionally disturbed indeed.

I could be wrong, but I believe that more relationships start sexual quite early on, then become deeper partnerships, than those that start as friends and eventually become lovers.

Love is about accepting someone as is; for who they are. It's not my problem if people can't accept me for who I am. It is actually a show of confidence in myself to believe that I am an adequate enough person that people should accept me. If I accept myself for who I am, then there is no reason why someone else shouldn't accept me.

I wish I had thought of that when Mockingbird was here. She said the same thing as Enigmatic_Oddity but with a lot more bitchiness.

Last edited by ELLCIM on 09 Jun 2006, 8:42 pm, edited 1 time in total.

See my comments above.

Women are definitely not objects, although they are often treated as such. The PROBLEM we have here, though, is that obviously Snake has grown up in a similar region to myself, where women are significantly outnumbered by men in their age group - 105 men for every 100 women where I live, for example. Assuming there are 30,000 women in my age group in this community, there will be 31,500 men - therefore there will always be at least 1500 single men. That is a hell of a lot of competition. I am repeating this statistic because it needs to be repeated to help some of us understand why women are sometimes percieved as holding all the cards. No matter what, and assuming of course that everyone is hetrosexual (for the sake of argument ONLY), there will always be at least five single men and potentially zero single women in a group of 105 men and 100 women. And, when you have that situation, women have a greater choice than men. That is simple mathematics and if you want to dispute that, then maybe you need to go back to primary school.